1996 1 month, my lovely daughter flew into the world in the warm winter sun 10: 55. With her loud cry, I upgraded from a woman to a mother. Of course, I didn't realize clearly that I would be a teacher at the same time. ...
As I said in one of my diaries, the girl who once loved to play the game of "going home" and held a doll as a "mother" seriously, have you ever thought about the hardships of being a real mother? Have you ever thought about being a mother and a teacher? ?
Teaching and nurturing are almost synchronous, and prenatal education is even earlier than postnatal feeding. Raising children is far from being as simple as dressing warmly and feeding well. It seems that the newborn who has been awake all day has not slept for long. I think sound (soft music), color stimulation, mother's (or other relatives') smile, expression of love, gentle caress, even gentle and unrealistic humming, are all essential for children. She doesn't know anything, but she feels the initial love of this world, and she will whine back to you …
I love books. The first habit I taught my daughter was to love reading.
Reading has benefited me a lot. From Childhood Childhood, Youth Literature and Art, Story Meeting to Readers (Reader's Digest at first), Youth Digest, Yilin and so on. From reading ordinary magazines to reading many famous Chinese and foreign books, I was addicted to the story from the beginning to being more willing to read people's minds and touch people's souls later. Reading opens a window for me, through which I can know the world and feel more light and light in my life. At the same time, this window guides me to see life further and deeper, not just the complexity and triviality in front of me. I hope my daughter can also benefit from the habit of lifelong reading.
Reading fairy tales and telling stories are my daily classes with my daughter. She never gets enough stories. She told one story after another before going to bed, but still not satisfied, pestering you to tell it again. In the process of speaking, "by the way" extends and develops with words that children can understand. If we can combine some behaviors or habits in her daily life and compare them with the people and things in the story, the effect will be better! The education in the story, the invisible truth, is self-evident compared with simple accusation and reprimand.
The selection of books must be from shallow to deep, step by step, and the content should be interesting and ideological, from pictures to words, from phonetic notation to pure words. Fairy tales, poems, stories, interesting popular science, natural knowledge, children's biographies, children's masterpieces, etc. The principle is, according to the age of the child, from shallow to deep. This requires parents to be "willing" and "patient", and of course, it is best to be "book lovers" to some extent. Reading is a habit of parents, an indispensable part of parents' life, and can also be a habit of children.
When Feifei was in the first grade, the teacher gave the children a minute to read. She read 140 words in one minute, much faster than other students in the class. At that time, most children read 70 to 80 words a minute. I am a governess full of joy in my heart! Good reading habits will inevitably lay a solid foundation for future Chinese learning, and at the same time, the understanding of mathematics and physics will also have a good start; Of course, what I value more is that excellent books, just like another invisible teacher, have a subtle influence on children's thoughts and behaviors, and it is easier to form a correct outlook on life, world outlook and values, laying the thickest and most stable foundation for her good growth in the future.
Second, persevere and talk about learning in interest classes.
Probably when my daughter was in the middle class of kindergarten, one day, she came back from kindergarten and told me excitedly, mom, I want to learn piano, too! It turned out that several children in the class were learning the electronic piano. Seeing that others could play the piano, she was envious and asked for it when she went home.
On the question of children enrolling in interest classes, my understanding is: respect their own wishes and don't force them. In other words, she must have the interest and desire to learn, not be forced by her parents. Whether it's music, art, dance, etc. Learning and cultivating any interest is not a matter of signing up for a class to spend some money, not a matter of three minutes of enthusiasm, but a matter of perseverance. Don't simply think that it is just a matter of children learning a hobby, but also a matter of cultivating children's willpower, concentration and perseverance. The most taboo is to fish for three days and cast a net for two days. Learn this today and change that tomorrow. In the end, I spent money and time and got nothing. I have also developed the bad habit of children playing with water and throwing water away, which has played a negative role in the cultivation of children's willpower.
Before I agreed to let my daughter learn the piano, I had a serious face-to-face conversation with the villain after careful consideration, and even signed a "written agreement"! I said to my enthusiastic daughter, Phyl, you wanted to learn the piano yourself, not your mother, right? She nodded; I said, learning piano may not be as simple as you think, but the most important thing is persistence, understand? She nodded again. Ok, I drafted a few words to the effect that on a certain day in a certain year, Feifei asked to learn electronic piano, and her mother agreed to Feifei's request. I asked my daughter to sign her name. I said, mom kept this paper for you. If you don't practice the piano well in the future, mom will show it to you.
The daughter later smiled and said, Mom, your "routine" is a bit deep and a bit "wily"! Although a piece of paper can't solve all the problems in practicing the piano, what I want to infiltrate my daughter is that people are responsible for their own choices. The study of electronic piano lasted for seven years. Later, I bought her a piano. Playing the piano became her specialty after class, which enhanced her self-confidence, became a good way to adjust and relax, and more importantly, honed her willpower.
Third, adolescent children, do you really understand?
Children's physical and mental health is always higher than academic performance. A happy "blue collar" who is physically and mentally healthy and constantly striving for self-improvement is far better than a so-called "white collar" who has psychological problems and is unhappy all day.
The daughter is lively, cheerful and kind-hearted, and both boys and girls are very popular. In the second day of junior high school, I took my own money and traveled to other provinces with a group of boys and girls. I just realized that the child has really grown up! That is, in the second half of the second semester of junior high school, I noticed my daughter's "budding youth". My daughter, who tells me almost everything, tells me who likes who and who likes her in my class. She said that there are many others, and she obviously has reservations about her own affairs.
In fact, when my daughter comes home from school, she always follows a tail. As soon as she left the community gate at school, someone greeted her with a bottle of milk tea in his hand, and suddenly there were many lollipops at home! My daughter dodged when she answered the phone.
Worried? It is a lie to say that you are not worried. After all, you are facing a highly competitive senior high school entrance examination. But I'm not surprised, I'm not disgusted, and I'm never stiffly depressed! Boys and girls get along with each other day and night, and have a good impression on the opposite sex at the age of youth. First, it is very normal. Second, this emotion is pure and sincere, and it is definitely not utilitarian. This is a beautiful feeling. On the basis of understanding, the guidance of breeze and drizzle is my method. Be generous and talk to your daughter about your feelings and physical changes. Never make a fuss or be condescending. Let her know that her body and mind are normal, and let her gradually put down her defensive mentality towards her parents so as not to cause excessive behavior. In this way, as a guide, you can basically grasp the "development trend" and direction of things.
I know one thing clearly: On June 20th, my "crazy" daughter began to write her "emotional diary" in front of her desk every day from June 1 day, and began to study after writing enough! Look in your eyes and worry in your heart! But I didn't interrupt her. I pretend to know nothing, even though my heart is burning! Because I think writing at this time is probably the best way for her to vent her emotions, repose her emotions and even calm her mind. On the surface, she seems to have delayed valuable study time, but after writing, she is calm and can enter effective study time; If you jump out to interfere, on the one hand, it will cause great resentment among children, and the mood will be "a wave of unrest, and a wave will rise again." On the other hand, it is most likely that people seem to be learning, but they have not actually entered their minds and hearts. In my seemingly "understatement", seemingly "unintentional" or even "laissez-faire" approach, my daughter successfully passed the senior high school entrance examination and was admitted to one of our five famous local schools (high schools) with excellent results.
After five years of hard work (medical major), my daughter with excellent grades has obtained the qualification of direct blog, and now she is a sophomore student in a famous school.
I don't want to show off my daughter's achievements in learning, but I want to emphasize that good life growth is the foundation and the effect of learning is a by-product of growth. The relationship between the two must not be reversed! In the environment of exam-oriented education, many parents simply emphasize "learning" and "achievement", which greatly ignores their children's ideological and psychological growth. Put the cart before the horse, there is something wrong with the foundation How can we have a good learning effect? Even if the academic performance is good, the direction of life is deviated and psychological distortion occurs, then once the problem breaks out, the consequences will be far greater than the problems caused by poor academic performance alone! Such examples are too numerous to mention, so I won't repeat them here.
May Bookstore said: Education is a science and an art, and with the development of the times, economic development and environmental changes, new problems and challenges are constantly emerging. I solemnly warn and remind teachers and parents to "fear" this science! ! Education rejects ignorance and blindness, but it needs learning and exploration; Rejecting arbitrariness requires objectivity and rationality; Reject arrogance and self-righteousness as a teacher or parent. What is needed is equality, respect, understanding and love. Please calm down and seriously think about how to realize the effectiveness of education, how to make the methods and ideas of education keep up with the changes of the times and environment, how to ensure fairness in the education system and properly safeguard the personality of the educated. The object of education is people with flesh and blood and feelings, not the same "product" produced by the only standard in the education factory. Life is hot and people are diverse. As teachers, we still have a long way to go, and we still have too many ways to go. ...