Tell a simple joke
Tell a simple joke. Many people like to listen to jokes in life, and listen to a joke, especially good for the mood. There are a lot of jokes in our lives, so here's a look at telling a simple joke and related information.
Tell a simple joke 1
1, Grandma: your back of the ear when can be better?
Grandpa: When you talk less, my back of the ear will be better.
2, a reporter asked a 90-year-old grandfather, "moncler you have been married for 70 years, but still call your partner every day dear, baby, so many years have any secret?"
"No way, 20 years ago I forgot what she called, and I do not dare to ask her, can only call it that way"......
3, sunset, in the lake to see a gray-haired grandmother pushed the wheelchair, from time to time, bowed his head and the wheelchair on the old grandfather said something, so cozy!
I went up to ask the grandmother: how to keep this lifetime love?
The grandmother said: before he had an affair, once wanted to abandon me.
I: What did you do?
Granny: No, I broke his legs! ......
4, the other day in the supermarket, saw a pair of old grandparents.
Grandpa: old partner ah!
Grandma: Uh-huh.
Grandpa: Take whatever you want, don't be shy!
Grandma: Good old man.
What a loving couple...
Then I heard the grandfather say, "Just don't get caught.
Tell a simple joke2
A short classic joke1
1. Older unmarried men and women look like they've missed a stop on the bus. Sometimes it's because the seat on the bus is so comfortable that you simply don't want to get off; sometimes it's because you don't recognize the platform you're supposed to get off. What about men and women who never marry? They are bus drivers.
2. Those who show love are animals, and those who are loved are plants. If love is rejected, it is of course the animal that leaves, because plants don't produce feet to run away.
3, the man's biggest secret often tell confidants, not the same sex, family or wife. When the confidante becomes the wife, this part of her power is immediately canceled. It's called having something to gain and something to lose.
4, many singers who sing love songs have never loved, which is the most ridiculous thing, but also the most logical thing. If you've loved it, you won't be able to sing it with such intoxication.
5, a good woman is a man's school. Good women, however, hope that this good student will never graduate.
6, an unmarried woman lamented: why mature men, good men have become people's husbands, not married to a decent man? Someone reminded her: wives cultivate good husbands are self-produced, no man can be self-taught.
7, the deeper and longer the relationship, care is more and more specific, from elegant to vulgar, from the spirit to the flesh. When she was in love, she asked him, "Is your mood beautiful? Married, she asked him "this fish 6 dollars a catty expensive?" Or, "Is your hemorrhoid healed yet?"
Short classic laughs joke 2 1, take the train home, sleeper, to midnight more than twelve o'clock, the train came up a young mother with a small child, the child that cried ah: "I don't want to do the train, the train at night there are ghosts. " His mom: "Nonsense, the train where the ghost." Children: "You lie, our teachers have said, the train has railroad tracks." 2, two friends can not afford to hurt. Bet on the square, a friend lost, punished him and the big moms square dance. All kinds of reluctance, squirming after going to jump. And then jumped high, pulling not to go served! 3, last night after running after the leg press, a boy came over to me to micro-signal, I refused. Back to my brother and I said: hey ... do not always say that I can not get married, look at all the people accosted. Brother said: sister, I can only say that the sky is too dark, he did not see clearly. 4, I: "Mom, you remember when I was a child love to kick the quilt not?" "Remember ah, why?" "At that time, I always have a nightmare at night, dreaming that I was tied to the bed with a rope, feeling hot and uncomfortable but can not move, no one to save me..." "That's not a dream, that person is me." 5. When I got home from work, I felt that the atmosphere was not right, and my mom was sitting on the sofa with a gloomy face! Dad and nephew are bowing their heads! I asked my mom in a low voice what happened. Mom immediately exploded like a pot and yelled: "Your father, this son of a bitch actually took xx (nephew) secretly outside to eat stinky tofu! They are the most annoying of all, and they didn't even pack a bag for me. I also asked how did you know they ate the stinky tofu? Mom replied: I happened to be at the stall next to them eating skewers! Short Classic Jokes 3 1, the lower bunk roommate to bring his girlfriend back to the dormitory for the night, the latter half of the night in my sleep was shaken awake, and then heard the girl said: "You're a little lighter, don't give the upper bunk to shake down!" I returned in a daze: "It's okay, my hand grasping the edge of the bed, fell not down!" 2. "Have you ever peed while swimming?" "Occasionally." "Uh, you're disgusting!" "I can't help it, it's purely accidental, I can't control it." "How is that even an accident?" "When you have a bowel movement, you bring out a bit of urine, more or less." Nyah! 3, the morning when buying food encountered a counting over the account of the peddler, he asked me how much money? I also can not count out, we both look at the same time the sky pretending to try to think like. Later or he conceded, touch out a small calculator. My face was finally saved. 4, overtime to very late, driving a beautiful colleague to go home, in an old neighborhood door I stopped the car: "I'll send you to this, I do not go in." Colleagues came over and leaned in my ear and said: "You drive me in, but also go up to sit." I decisively refused. Looked at the back of the colleague to go, I thought: if you practice properly subject two, and now do not have to worry about pouring not out! 5, there is an old saying: "All evils are the first, all good filial piety first. So the question is, is a filial piety lechery good or bad people? Short classic laughable jokes 4 1, do not make friends with people in cities below 40 degrees, not familiar! 2, I hope you understand that I take everything in stride. But it does not affect me to hold a grudge. 3, crying if it is useful, I am a useful person, if I am a useful person, I still cry what. 4, our eight tolerance: New Year's Eve, people are dead, come to all, are not easy, or children, years old, for your own good, get used to it. 5, maturity is, know the world and not the world, is that you are more and more able to accept the reality, not more and more realistic. 6, you look closely at the flip-flops, like a thong worn by the toes? 7, "money is not everything" is the first poor people put forward, "there is no ugly woman only lazy woman" is the first ugly people put forward, "diligence can make up for clumsiness" is the As a natural weakling, we always have to make up some theories as a support to deceive ourselves to be brave. I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do that. 1, there is a polar bear and a penguin playing together, the penguin to the body of the hair one by one plucked down, after plucking, said to the polar bear: "good cold oh! 2, Xiao Ming lost a leg in a car accident, Xiao Ming lost another leg in a car accident, Another car accident, Xiao Ming lost his other leg, A car accident, Xiao Ming lost his leg, In fact, Xiao Ming is a dog, 3, One day, Cabbage walks on the road, felt very hot, so he took off one after another, and he lost himself. 4. There was a bun walking on the road, felt very hungry, and ate itself. 5, Xiaoming and Xiaohong is the same table, one day, Xiaoming borrowed a pen from Xiaohong, Xiaohong said "do not borrow" "Lend me you will die ah!" Then Red said "Oh, lend it to you then" When Ming gave the pen back to Red, Red really died. 6. Once upon a time, there was a little sheep, one day he went out to play, and he ran into the big bad wolf. The big bad wolf said, "I'm going to eat you!!!" Guess what? As a result, the big bad wolf ate the lamb. 7. Bug: Little Flower, did you use my pencil? Little Flower: No, I didn't use it. Bug: You're useless? Little Flower: I'm useless! Worm: Ugh, you're the 17th person to admit you're useless 8. When will Taiwan want unification? When you buy instant noodles 9. One day Xiao Qiang asked his dad, "Dad, am I a stupid child?" Dad said, "Silly boy, how can you be a silly boy?" 10, a three-minute steak and a five-minute steak in the street met, why they did not say hello? (Assuming they can talk) Because ...... they are not familiar with ah ~~~~~~~~ 11, the devil: God, can I reincarnation? God: Yes. Devil: I don't want to be a devil anymore, I want to be white like an angel and have a pair of wings, but I still want to suck blood. God: then, you will be reincarnated as a Lancaster 12, there is a man one day encountered God God suddenly a great deal of goodwill intends to give the man a wish God asked: what do you have a wish? The man thought for a moment and said: I heard that cats have nine lives, so please give me nine lives! And God said: Your wish comes true! One day, the man was bored, and thought, "I'm going to die, I've got 9 lives anyway." So he lay down on the railroad tracks, and a train went by, and the man died, and why was he dead? Because that train has 10 carriages, 13, Xiaoming owes the underground - money bank 200,000, Xiaoming begged him to let a few more days, The money bank people said: "tomorrow must pay back, or else ......, chopped off 2 fingers; The day after tomorrow then ...... in chopping off 4; the 3rd day then ......" Xiao Ming: "Is it not necessary to pay back" The man from the money changer: "NO, you will become Tinkerbell by then." 14, there is a person, his stomach is not good, one day, he came to the gastroenterology hospital to see a doctor, the doctor said: "I eat what pull what, eat watermelon pull watermelon, eat cucumber pull cucumber!" The doctor thought about it and said to him: "I think you can only eat - shit!" 15, the forest three small animals in the chat, piglet said: now popular with nicknames, you after you call me piggy piggy. Rabbit said: good, then I will be called little rabbit rabbit. Chicken face unhappy said: I still have things to do, first go 16, a man went to the hospital to see a doctor, the doctor said: you have to blood test, urine test, stool test After a while, he came back to the doctor said: I blood also swallowed, urine also swallowed, but stool is really swallowed