Some social research findings show that in a home where children have personality problems, most of these three situations: one is extremely busy parents doing business; two is a single-parent family; three is the mother is extremely strong at home.
Of these, the last one, is the most important cause of the child's personality problems. An overly strong mother brings not only cowardice in her son and husband, but also conflicts and ups and downs in family life. Imagine if you are a woman and your husband lives in such a family, then after marriage, I'm afraid you will have to face not only the grinding of living habits with your in-laws, but also put up with your mother-in-law's character.
Tianya had always known that Zhou Heng's mother was very strong, after all, they had been classmates from middle school to university. Since their school days, Zhou Heng was very afraid of his mother, but Tianya understood that Zhou Heng did not give up his resistance. When they grew up, the two childhood friends decided to enter the marriage hall together and be each other's soul mates for the rest of their lives, so they started to prepare for matters related to their engagement.
And both parents are very favorable to the marriage, after all, Tianya and Zhou Heng have known each other for more than ten years, know their roots and are very compatible. On the New Year's Day after the engagement, Tian Ya decided to go back to his home with Zhou Heng and spend the New Year's Day at her fiancé's home. This was originally a happy and sweet thing, after all, taking the initiative to go to her prospective mother-in-law's house represented the importance and care Tian Ya had for Zhou Heng.
But whenever Zhou Heng thought of his strong mother, Tian Ya's future strong mother-in-law, he could not help but sweat. As expected, on the first day Tianya arrived at Zhou's house, Zhou Heng's mother didn't give a single smile, and after dinner she went to do her own thing, leaving the table full of dishes for Tianya.
However, it was good that Zhou Heng and his father took the initiative to get up and clean up, saving Tianya from a moment of embarrassment. Seeing Zhou Heng's mother's attitude, Tian Ya, who had already been psychologically prepared, didn't feel very surprised, she didn't carry any dissatisfaction, but very calmly helped Zhou Heng and his father-in-law-to-be to do the housework.
Not only that, but in the days that followed, Tianya took the initiative to buy food and cook, and served tea and water to her mother-in-law-to-be. In her view, no matter what, she is her lover's mother. However, Tianya's concessions were not taken into account by Zhou's mother, who had been used to being strong at home for many years and seemed to have forgotten that Tianya was not obliged to obey her, let alone grovel for her.
One night, Zhou Heng's mother returned home from a square dance, and as soon as she entered the house, she yelled that she was sore and wanted to soak her feet. At that moment, Zhou Heng, who was washing dishes in the kitchen, offered to go and pour water for his mother to soak her feet, and Tianya, seeing that Zhou Heng was washing dishes, said, "I'll go." Tian Ya thoughtfully adjusted the temperature of the foot washing water for her prospective mother-in-law, however, without a word of thanks, Mother Zhou nonchalantly stuck her feet in.
Ten minutes passed, mother Zhou was contentedly soaking her feet, and she, who was used to huffing and puffing at home, even directly called Tianya out of the bedroom and asked her to go and pour out the foot washing water. Tian Ya was really a bit angry at this time, she looked at her mother-in-law-to-be with a puzzled face, thinking about how she could say such inappropriate words. The atmosphere was getting more and more awkward, at this point, Zhou Heng snapped first: "Mom, don't go too far, I didn't marry Tian Ya home so that she could put up with you with me!"
"What's wrong with pouring a foot wash, condescending to her?" Mother Zhou habitually showed no weakness.
"I'm your son, it's fine that you've been strong with me for so many years, but Tianya is my future wife, you didn't raise her, so who is she to put up with your excessive demands.
From the time she came to the house, in big and small things, which one thing she did not let you, which one thing you did properly. I'll put my words here today, it's fine for you to be strong with me, but with Tianya, there's no door!" This was probably the first time Zhou Heng had spoken to his mother in such a hard tone since he had grown up to such a large age, and if it wasn't because of his affection for Tianya, perhaps he would never have disobeyed his mother in his life.
However, loving someone is like this, love will make people become brave, become assertive and responsible. Therefore, Zhou Heng's years of going against the grain were all completely overturned the moment his beloved was wronged. Later, under the persuasion of Zhou Heng's father, Zhou Heng's mother symbolically gave in to a soft, Tian Ya also because of the deep love for Zhou Heng, very tolerant and generous to choose not to take it personally.
After about half a year, Zhou Heng and Tian Ya became husband and wife as they wished. Although Tian Ya was a bit unhappy with her mother-in-law for pouring foot-washing water in her in-laws' home, the two of them still became a family. For this family, in the future, they might still need to go through many conflicts and bumps in the road before they could really live their lives smoothly. But understanding each other is always the first step to a better life.
No matter how Zhou Heng and Tianya's life will be after they get married, at least Zhou Heng's words did save their marriage. Otherwise, even if Tian Ya loves Zhou Heng again, she may choose to withdraw from the marriage and no longer continue with Zhou Heng. In fact, after learning about Zhou Heng and Tian Ya's experience, Xi Mei wondered: is it good or bad for a woman to be too strong?
In Ximei's opinion, a woman should have a temper, but not too strong. A woman who is too strong is not conducive to the harmony and happiness of family life. First of all, in the process of children's growth, the father's love must contain a certain degree of majesty and solemnity, so as to facilitate the formation of children's correct values and the concept of marriage.
Secondly, in daily life, a gentle and considerate woman always knows better than a strong housekeeper how to live a good life. So, whether in love or in the family, a woman needs to control her temper and not be too strong.
It is important to know that a man with a good temper has a limit to his patience. Proper consideration for your family and proper control of your tone of voice can only add to a good life