Short, humorous and healthy positive energy jokes

Short, humorous and healthy positive energy jokes

Short, humorous, healthy and positive energy paragraphs, many people often feel stressed in their lives, so humorous and positive energy paragraphs are very decompression choices. Many people like to watch jokes in their spare time to relieve stress and watch short, humorous and healthy positive energy jokes together.

Short, humorous, healthy and positive energy jokes 1 "1. It is said that a boy A hurt his finger in junior high school class and shouted "I'm hurt!" " Another boy, B, immediately said kindly, "I told you not to compete with dogs for food." A replied angrily, "Oh, C, I didn't know your father was so cruel. "

2. Is this a warning from heaven?

In Suzhou, it's raining heavily outside now, and just a flash of lightning struck the ground not far from me (when smoking on the balcony). Is God warning me because I am downloading some Japanese movies? Solve! ! !

B: He is reminding you to use thunder.

Today, in order to interest my husband in ironing clothes, I bought an ironing board. This ironing board is very unusual, with a beautiful woman in a bathing suit printed on it. As soon as the board was hot, the swimsuit disappeared. As a result, he glued the board to the radiator.

Xiaohua, did you use my pencil? Xiaohua: No, I'm useless. Bug: Are you really useless? Xiaohua: I'm so useless! Bug: Alas, you are the17th person to admit that you are useless. B bug: Everyday, do you have a ruler? Tian Tian: No. Bug: Shameless person. Hey hey ~ ~ ~ "

4. "Japanese Prime Minister Mori Yoshiro never speaks without thinking. He always said the wrong thing and was laughed at by the media, which made him almost lose the election on June 25th. The following is the story of Premier Mori Yoshiro's visit to the United States.

Everyone knows that Prime Minister Sen's English is not good. Before going to the United States, reporters felt that if the prime minister of the Great Japanese Empire could not even say simple English greetings, it would make Japan, the country of God, too embarrassed to beg for help temporarily. They brainstormed: Never mind. After meeting, put out your hand and say, "How are you?" To Clinton. Clinton will definitely say, "I'm fine, and you?" Prime Minister Sen replied, "Me too!" Leave the rest to the translator. There are so many journalists who love me so much. Prime Minister Sen was overjoyed. He kept practicing on the government plane, flew across the Pacific Ocean in the night sky, and heard Mori Yoshiro mumbling to practice American pronunciation in his dream.

、、、、、、"

The famous British philosopher herbert spencer has never been married. Once, he met two friends on the road. A friend asked him, "Don't you regret being single?"

Spencer replied happily: "People should be satisfied with their decisions, and I am satisfied with my decisions. I often comfort myself that somewhere in this world, there is a woman who is happy because she is not my wife. "

Short, humorous, healthy and positive energy jokes II

1, don't be lazy with me, I'm too lazy to compare with you!

There are so many people who despise me. Who are you?

For the rich, everything is fine if the ending is good.

Most people only do three things in their life: deceive themselves, deceive others and be bullied.

5, not afraid of being used, I am afraid that you are useless.

Short humorous healthy positive energy joke 3 1, giraffe and white rabbit

Giraffe said, "Little Rabbit, I hope you know how good it is to have a long neck. No matter what I eat, I will slowly pass through my long neck, and that kind of delicious food can be enjoyed for a long time. "

The little white rabbit looked at him without expression.

"Also, in summer, cold water slowly flows through my long neck, which is delicious. What a long neck! White rabbit, can you imagine? "

The white rabbit said slowly, "Have you ever vomited?"

2. The magic white rabbit

One day, a kangaroo was driving along a country road, and suddenly he saw a white rabbit in the middle of the road, with his ears and body almost lying on the ground, as if listening to something.

So the kangaroo stopped the car and asked curiously, "What are you listening to, Little White Rabbit?"

"A big truck passed by here half an hour ago."

"Wow,,, that's amazing! How did you know? 、、"

"He XX! That's how my neck and legs were broken. "

3. Happy little white rabbit

There is a little white rabbit running happily in the forest. On the way, it met a giraffe who was rolling marijuana. The white rabbit said to the giraffe, "giraffe, giraffe, why do you want to do something that hurts yourself?" Look at how beautiful this forest is. Let's run in nature together! "

The giraffe looked at the marijuana and the white rabbit, threw the marijuana behind her and ran with the white rabbit in the forest.

Later, they met an elephant ready to take cocaine. The white rabbit said to the elephant, "elephant, elephant, why do you want to do something that hurts yourself?" Look at how beautiful this forest is. Let's run in nature together! "

The elephant looked at the cocaine and the white rabbit, threw the cocaine behind him and ran in the forest with the white rabbit and giraffe.

Later, they met a lion who was about to fight heroin. The white rabbit said to the lion, "Lion, lion, why did you do something that hurt yourself?" Look at how beautiful this forest is. Let's run in nature together! "

The lion took a look at the syringe and the white rabbit, threw the syringe behind him, rushed over and beat the white rabbit severely.

The elephant and giraffe trembled with fear: "why did you hit the white rabbit?" It is so kind, cares about our health and lets us get close to nature. "

The lion said angrily, "Every time this son of a bitch eats an ecstasy, he drags me around the forest like a * *."

4. White rabbits and ants

Walking in the forest, the ant suddenly met an elephant. The ant burrowed into the soil and stretched out a leg.

The little white rabbit was curious and asked, What are you doing?

The ant whispered to it:

Shh ... don't make a sound, watch me trip. ...