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The opposite sex produces not only love, but also friendship. The opposite sex can not only have friendship, but also complement each other, and their different tendencies will compensate each other. In other words, the benefits of communication between boys and girls are many. Pure friendship between the opposite sex is a special relationship between men and women and a neutral relationship. Both men and women need to deviate from their original gender and find a balance point, which is the core of pure friendship. This is different from love, although heterosexual friendship has many similarities, including: knowledge, interest, ability, ideals, values and so on; You can also appreciate each other, understand each other, tolerate each other, support each other and benefit from each other; Know each other better, trust each other's eyes, and even rely on each other at critical times. However, this relationship between the opposite sex is not exclusive. Both sides can have many such friends, or friends of both sides will get to know each other and establish friendship.
From the perspective of friendship, true friendship is a relationship based on mutual understanding and trust in communication. There is no gender, no distance, no distinction between high and low. Opposite-sex friendship is a relaxed and broad emotion. The establishment of heterosexual friendship only has the same ideals and interests, the same opinions and understanding. They are like two parallel rails. They will meet all the time, but they won't get together, and they will only bless each other silently. But mutual criticism is also indispensable, because the person who always criticizes you is not necessarily a bad person, and the person who always helps you speak is not necessarily a good person. False friendship will destroy pure friendship. This is true friendship. For teenagers, they are in the primary stage of life and have a preliminary understanding of everything. Everything is wonderful. At this time, friendship is easier to form. As long as it is correctly grasped and understood, the friendship between teenagers of the opposite sex will be even better.
Because teenagers are in adolescence, the rapid changes in physical and psychological development make their emotions fluctuate easily, their ability to act is enhanced, their demands for independence of personality are increased, and at the same time they have the idea of being willing to communicate with the opposite sex. These are normal phenomena, not "love". Learning to communicate with the opposite sex is a compulsory "social class" for teenagers. During this period, it is necessary to gradually establish a good communication consciousness and cultivate a healthy communication psychology. However, more parents and teenagers will not have a correct attitude towards this situation, so they will worry that once children establish a bridge of friendship with the opposite sex, it will be difficult to ensure that this bridge will not become a "magpie bridge". Therefore, some parents will mystify the communication with the opposite sex and divide it into a forbidden area. Yes, teenagers are really immature, and they will certainly encounter many difficulties and problems when interacting with the opposite sex. But people's psychological maturity can not be achieved by waiting, and the skills of communicating with the opposite sex can only be explored and improved in practice. In fact, a person who has not learned to communicate with the opposite sex and achieved heterogeneous social interaction can hardly be said to be a mature person. Some people may think that encouraging or letting go of sexual intercourse means agreeing or supporting teenagers to fall in love, but it is not. Basically, the purpose of encouraging teenagers to make friends with the opposite sex is to let them know how to make friends with "people" and prepare for future love.
Adolescence is a crucial period for the socialization of teenagers, and heterosexual friendship is indispensable. At this time, both boys and girls are attracted by the opposite sex or by the opposite sex magnetic field with their unique gender magnetic field. They didn't realize it, let alone plan it. According to the natural process of human psychological and social development, a normal person needs to learn to establish heterosexual friendship from junior high school. Communication with the opposite sex is not something that happens when you grow up. On the contrary, if you really wait until you leave school and get out of society before you start learning to communicate with the opposite sex, you are likely to become a "difficult household" in this area because of lack of exercise. It is normal for boys and girls who enter adolescence to have subtle changes in their attitudes, expressions, words and deeds towards their opposite sex parents. However, this process can't last long, so we should make teenagers' gender magnetic field shift from heterosexual parents to the opposite sex of the same age and peers as soon as possible. This is a special part of teenagers' socialization, which can be called "second weaning period" or "psychological weaning period". Both men and women are eager to get close, so they are willing to participate in group activities with the opposite sex, such as going out for an outing, singing, dancing or participating in sports activities. And show concern, consideration and willingness to help students of the opposite sex win the favor of the opposite sex. However, after all, boys and girls still don't know how to get along with the opposite sex, and most of the contacts and exchanges are not exclusive and exclusive.
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Heterosexual communication is an important part of interpersonal communication in our society. With the acceleration of the pace of life and the change of people's ideas, the friendship between the opposite sex will appear more and more frequently among people. The heterosexual communication between teenagers is not only possible, but also legitimate and necessary. It should be based on pure friendship, with the purpose of friendship, mutual assistance and progress. Adolescent high school students are very sensitive and curious about heterosexual communication. There is no need to restrict the normal communication of the opposite sex, and there is no need to force them to communicate with the opposite sex. Because different people have different levels of psychological and physical development, people's degree of socialization is also different. As long as they are within the normal range, they can develop naturally. How to communicate correctly and choose what kind of friends of the opposite sex have become skills that high school students should learn and master.
This requires a degree of communication with the opposite sex, that is to say, we must grasp the appropriateness and moderation of communication with the opposite sex. "Appropriate", that is, the ways and means of communication should be suitable for the acceptance of most people in the current society, and they should not be as casual and intimate as same-sex friends regardless of time, place and occasion, because men and women are different; "Moderation" means strictly grasping the framework of friendship, so that the nature of friendship is not beyond the scope of friendship. At this time, teenagers need to treat heterosexual communication with a correct attitude. So what should teenagers do?
First of all, in dealing with the opposite sex, we should "despise the opposite sex." The "contempt for the opposite sex" here does not mean gender discrimination, but that we don't treat boys as boys and girls as girls. We just have the same interests and hobbies as him or her. In the communication with the opposite sex, we should pay attention to eliminating the unnatural feeling between the opposite sex. Psychologically speaking, we should communicate with the opposite sex like friends of the same sex, because friendship is the natural development of feelings, and the steps of natural communication between the opposite sex can often describe the track of pure friendship, which has been proved by countless life practices. Being able to "despise" the opposite sex and not take it seriously is a sign of maturity, so put it in the first place, because this is the first step towards maturity in life. It is difficult for people, especially teenagers, and it is the only difficulty, so it becomes a symbol of maturity. To really do this, teenagers need to have a correct attitude, cultivate a healthy awareness of communication, dilute each other's gender awareness, think naively, and be natural and graceful when communicating.
Secondly, there should be extensive communication or group communication to avoid too much personal contact. This is also a new explanation to reduce the sensitivity of heterosexual communication. This new explanation means that a person must learn to associate with all kinds of people in the process of growing up, so the so-called heterosexual communication is a kind of "seeking difference communication". Communicating with the opposite sex is just the need of learning, or the discussion of the same topic.
Thirdly, be polite, that is, in the communication with the opposite sex, we should pay attention to discretion, not be too intimate, behave in a dignified and steady manner, and speak politely and nobly. It is annoying to be too formal in heterosexual communication, but it should not be too casual, such as laughing, pushing and pulling. It should be noted that the opposite sex is different after all, some topics can only be discussed between the same sex, and some jokes should not be played in front of the opposite sex. For teenagers, this is a bit difficult, because with the development of the times, many concepts are unknown to teenagers now, and more people disdain the view that men and women are not close. But the most basic thing is not to talk about gender in front of the opposite sex.