Zhou Ling, the author of Cognitive Drive, starts from the two aspects of the heart and technique of doing something, and unveils the mystery of internal and external cultivation for us. Everyone who wants to make a difference can find their way through the book.
Next, I will share with you the essence of this book from both internal and external cultivation.
Internal cultivation, in the final analysis, is to make yourself develop excellent qualities and become a better version of yourself.
1. The key to change is to create value.
In the workplace, many people are doing jobs they don't like, and have not resigned in order to make a sizable income each month. Can you say they don't want to change? I'm afraid that people who sell their time in exchange for payment want to escape from the work they don't like and do what they are interested in.
To create replicable value, you have to change the fundamental situation of selling your time for income and make yourself a person who is strongly desired by others.
Obviously, at this point it is clear that "I want" is not going to get us anywhere, but rather we need to shift to "I can give" and use this as an opportunity to engage in social exchange in order to get the feedback you want.
Changing someone's mind, through persuasion and control, is not wise behavior. Just think about how hard it is to change the mind of your boss or significant other in the workplace and in the family.
It's better to start from your own value, and use your actions to influence and serve others.
2. Assume an identity label and have strong beliefs.
If you like to follow dramas, you must have seen a lot of bridges that catch your eyes. Want to become another identity, the best is to have a strong belief from the beginning.
Whether you read a book, exercise or develop any hobby, you need to start from a future perspective, imagine yourself in line with the ideal state of that identity, and then work your way forward little by little, aided by your daily behavioral habits.
When you encounter a problem, you may want to tell yourself that I have encountered a situation; when you encounter a failure, you may want to tell yourself that I have encountered a challenge. Through this perspective of speaking well, mobilize your subconscious mind and ensure that your mindset is positive.
Einstein, after experiencing every failed experiment, did not recognize it as a failure, believing that he had simply found tens of thousands of unsuitable methods.
The charm of language often supports your firm confidence.
3, clear the bad mood on the way to change.
When Kazuo Inamori was making decisions, he would usually get some people for advice. If it is a person with rational thinking, usually vote against the opinion; if it is a person with emotional thinking, they are usually emotional and raise their hands in favor.
If you want to carry out the decision, you choose the emotional thinking, if you want to implement the decision you find rational thinking, their pessimism, often from the full range of solutions to all kinds of mistakes.
The "negative preference" often makes people ignore a lot of good things, and timely change of perspective, you can know what you really want. The binary theory of black and white is not suitable for the adult world. Complexity is the essence of the development of things, and we are constantly correcting the process of unprecedented growth.
If you really want to be a better person, you have to be optimistic in the long run, pessimistic in the short run, and happy in the moment.
If internal cultivation is the mindfulness of growth and transformation, external cultivation is the technique that takes one from ordinary to exceptional, and the path to serving and influencing others.
External cultivation is to use your ability to influence others and make them better off.
1. The growth path of influencing others.
(1) Set a goal, this goal and motivation must be long-term. Only a long-term goal can have a continuous impact and a fixed identity label.
(2) Write it down and tell it to yourself and others. If you want to achieve something, you must write it down, write it down through yourself, examine the feasibility of the goal; through others, in the real world to achieve the goal of closing the loop, catalyzing you into action.
(3) Determine your ability to reach this identity label, the ability needed. In The Life Efficiency Handbook, Zhang Meng proposes a 7 character alignment method. The idea is to find 7 target people in the area of the identity label you want, look for the necessary skills to become something from them, and then practice them one by one until you get them.
(4) Deep practice. All know the 10,000 hour law, where deliberate practice becomes the key to your ability to gain.
(5) Lower expectations. Often times, the reason you stop in the middle is not only because you can't stick with it, but also because it's too ineffective. Rushing is a big no-no on the road to growth, and taking your time to polish is the best way to do it.
2. The bitterness of serving others, the environment and the dimension.
When I was in school, I often envied the performance of the school masters, how can I not get good grades? Seemingly mysterious existence, in fact, they are away from the environment with temptation, with a strong self-control.
Take the English words, the same time, the same place, the results are very different, why? The key lies in the fact that when you just memorize, they mobilize a variety of senses, reading, remembering, memorizing, writing, multi-latitude unfolding, the efficiency is naturally higher than you from a single dimension.
This time, you also have to admire the power of environment and dimension.
3. Growing up requires giving yourself a deadline.
Read a lot of books, know a lot of truth, but still can not live this life? Knowing to change, knowing to grow, but the speed is slower than the ants crawling, we are confused, anxious, and can not see the sun rising the next day.
Li Xiaolai once said, if you take the seven years as a lifetime, only do one thing, what will happen?
If this is the cycle of making something happen, I believe you will be a lot more certain, no longer in a hurry, and not give up halfway. I've seen a lot of reading videos lately that tell us that they started to stick with reading for more than seven years, isn't that the same reasoning?
If you can also keep in mind this cycle of success, adhere to it, I believe you will also see a different you.
Summary: Want to change, want to grow, still can not find a way? Why not use the book mentioned inside and outside to start, I believe that in the future will be able to see a different you.