Even when she grows up, she still can't accept her incomplete self. No matter how long has passed, that despair will continue forever.
She was alone in the dark, and her feet couldn't touch the ground, which made her extremely nervous. Someone once loved her, and some people pitied her, but their eyes touched the wheelchair behind her and her legs that could not stand upright, and they all turned away without exception.
There is only one person who ignores everything about her and really falls in love with her. Just because of love, she accepts all the good and the bad and is full of enthusiasm.
From 65438 to 0955, Zhang Haidi was born in Wendeng. The arrival of a new life makes the family extremely happy. Everyone wishes her good health and worry-free growth.
Like most little girls, Zhang Haidi, who is carefully cared for by her family, likes beautiful clothes and dancing. Watching birds fly in the sky, I used to wonder if she could fly like them.
However, everything came to an abrupt end when she was five years old. That year, Zhang Haidi unfortunately suffered from hemangioma. Due to the backward medical conditions, Zhang Haidi was completely paraplegic and could no longer walk upright. Since then, she has been accompanied by a wheelchair all her life.
In the following decades, even though she was used to sitting in a wheelchair, every time she thought of the shock and confusion brought to her by her physical defects at the age of five, she was deeply afraid and powerless. It was a wound that could not heal no matter how long.
Zhang Haidi was completely unconscious from the chest down because of paraplegia. Only her still flexible hands and working brain make her feel like a living person. In addition to physical discomfort, what makes Zhang Haidi unbearable is mental torture.
At that time, Zhang Haidi lay in bed all day, completely cut off from the outside world.
The companionship of parents and not giving up are important supports for Zhang Haidi to survive.
At an ignorant age, she doesn't know how to control and ease her emotions. She doesn't understand why she is the only one who is so unlucky, sitting still in a wheelchair when the other children are skipping and healthy.
At that time, she was extremely sensitive and inferior. She needs help from others in everything, which makes her feel that she must rely on others to survive. What made her more devastated was that she could never go to school again.
Because of her disability, she can no longer dance on the ground in her dancing shoes. Because of her disability, she can no longer measure the world she loves with her feet. Because of her disability, even the school closed the door to her.
Zhang Haidi once thought, what's the point of people like her living? Dancing and crossing mountains and rivers, which she once dreamed of, have now become extravagant hopes, and everything she insisted on and pursued suddenly lost its meaning of existence.
When she sat upstairs and looked down, she was not afraid of heights or death at all. If she really falls from here, will she really be free, and all the pain she has suffered will disappear? In the next life, she will have a healthy body.
Zhang Haidi's disappointment, loneliness and helplessness made her more mature than other children of her age, and also made her begin to explore the meaning of life earlier.
In order to change her depressed life, Zhang Haidi began to teach herself primary and junior high school courses at home, trying to keep up with her peers' learning progress. After his illness improved, at the age of fifteen, Zhang Haidi followed his parents to the countryside.
Due to the backward educational facilities, Zhang Haidi began to be a music teacher, guiding rural children to learn. At that time, she had a high sense of responsibility of "serving the people as long as I am alive". Even if the world kisses me with pain, I still want to sing it back.
Rural areas are not as good as cities, infrastructure construction in all aspects is not perfect, and medical conditions are even more backward. In those days in the countryside, Zhang Haidi saw many villagers suffering from illness because they couldn't buy medicine, so she began to teach herself medical skills.
Zhang Haidi has finished reading medical books about acupuncture and anatomy, and bought some basic medical equipment such as thermometers and stethoscopes.
Because he didn't learn professional skills, Zhang Haidi experimented on his own, looking for acupoints on himself and using small animals to learn anatomy. Only after she was proficient in technology did she begin to provide free medical services to the villagers.
In just a few years, Zhang Haidi has treated the masses more than 10,000 times for free, and she has also been affectionately called a "famous doctor" by the villagers.
Unable to walk Wan Li Road, Zhang Haidi began to read thousands of books, and learned about the world she had never set foot in through books, enriching her mind that was poor due to illness.
Zhang Haidi, who had never been to school, learned four languages: College English, Japanese, German and Esperanto through self-study, and took elective courses at the university and postgraduate level, and finally obtained a master's degree in philosophy from Jilin University.
1983, Zhang Haidi began to engage in literary creation. She is not feeling well, so she lies in the hospital bed and reads books by looking in the mirror.
Through this persistent pursuit of literature, she translated hundreds of thousands of English novels, 16 overseas works, and compiled books such as Pursuing Life and Dreams in Wheelchairs. In these books, she poured out her pain, despair and hope for life.
In 2002, she even wrote a novel "Extremely Top" with a length of 400,000 words.
"I am like a meteor. I want to leave the light on the earth." Even though I have never touched the ground under my feet for decades, she still wants to prove that she once existed in a gentle but powerful way of writing.
Not only that, Zhang Haidi, which has been caught in the rain, has always wanted to hold up an umbrella for the poor.
She often goes to welfare homes, special education schools and disabled families to visit the elderly and disabled children, telling them: Look, even if we have physical defects, the sun will still shine on us, and we can still shine.
Zhang Haidi built a school in the village where he once stayed, so that the poor and disabled children could go to school.
She has also been actively involved in all kinds of work and activities in the cause of the disabled, caring for and inspiring the disabled, making them love life and full of hope, and calling on the society to pay attention to this group and give them tolerance and understanding.
Zhang Haidi is a girl with rich spiritual world. People are easily attracted to her and have a good impression on her, but they don't live in an idealistic world. When they met her in a wheelchair, those "filters" naturally broke.
However, one person will come for her unique soul.
At that time, Wang Zuoliang, a people's teacher, saw a report about Zhang Haidi on the Internet. After learning her story, Wang Zuoliang took great interest in her, asked her for contact information through friends, and wrote to tell Zhang Haidi his own thoughts.
One to two, two people found each other getting louder and louder, and later, this emotion gradually evolved into love.
Zhang Haidi, who experienced the frustration of love, accepted Wang Zuoliang's feelings bravely without timidity.
Of course, their marriage will be hindered by Wang Zuoliang's parents, but the sentence "Be mentally prepared and face many difficulties" still affirmed the son's choice.
1982, Zhang Haidi and Wang Zuoliang got married. They didn't hold a grand wedding, and they didn't invite guests to celebrate. All they want is quiet happiness, without witness or publicity.
Because of love, they always think of each other first. Even if he is unwell, Zhang Haidi will help Wang Zuoliang do some simple housework, such as sweeping the floor and cleaning the table. As for Wang Zuoliang, he fully supports his wife in everything, helping her to remit money, deliver books and draw various color frames for her.
199 1 year, Zhang Haidi was diagnosed as basal cell carcinoma. From the previous fear of death to the present full of nostalgia, it is because of the appearance of the person who infinitely tolerates her joys and sorrows.
Before the operation, Zhang Haidi said to Wang Zuoliang: It would be great if I could survive. We can still live together. But if I die, don't be sad. God gave us some time together. Then, you can find a healthy woman who is better than me to love you.
Wang Zuoliang just silently clenched her hand, and her eyes were silent and moist.
Zhang Haidi always wanted to have a child of his own, but his physical condition didn't allow it, so they adopted a puppy named "Bench", which brought fun to life and pinned their expectations on it to accompany them.
Early in the morning, Zhang Haidi had fantasized through a ray of sunshine outside the window that if they had a daughter, it would be beautiful, with long braids, and rushed into her arms to call her mother sweetly. If she likes dancing, so much the better.
Zhang Haidi used to worry about his pension. Without children, who will support them in the future? What should Wang Zuoliang do when he is too old to move?
Wang Zuoliang just put his wife's hand in his own to give her a sense of security and said calmly, "Then, we will go to the nursing home together." .
Meeting each other in this life is their happiest thing. However, Zhang Haidi once said that if marriage can be scored, her married life will have at least 890 points, which shows that she is quite satisfied with her married life.
Although Zhang Haidi and Wang Zuoliang didn't have a wedding when they got married, for them, feelings don't need to be measured by superficial ceremonies. It has always been that person who has been with them all these years, which is their most romantic commitment to each other.