Interpersonal relationship in college dormitory is an important part of college students' interpersonal relationship. Good interpersonal relationship in dormitory is beneficial to college students' physical and mental health and forms good living habits.
However, in recent years, university dormitories have become the focus of conflicts among college students. Originally, it was a fate for universities to share a dormitory. The "good brothers sleeping in my upper bunk" are "roommates" and "good brothers" and "good sisters". Their friendship is growing day by day, which will become a beautiful memory in life. In fact, from Zhu Lingthallium poisoning in Tsinghua University to Ma Jiajue poisoning in Yunnan University, and now to dormitory poisoning in Fudan University, it is not uncommon for "roommates to quarrel" because of trivial matters ... There are endless vicious wounding incidents in colleges and universities in China. Students * * * have a good friendship since ancient times, why is it now reduced to the point of "thank you among classmates"? How to deal with the dormitory relationship of college students?
The conflict between cultural differences and living habits, the diversity of personality and interests, and various competitions between roommates make today's university dormitories often become the gathering place and explosion place of student contradictions. Careless dormitory relationships can also turn into "dangerous adultery". Therefore, it is necessary for schools and classmates to work together to build a harmonious dormitory relationship.
From an individual point of view, college students need to do:
1. Timely communication and empathy
Everyone has the right to stick to his own way of life, but it should be on the premise of not interfering with others. "There is no shortage of gold, and no one is perfect". We should respect the differences between individuals, tolerate each other's defects and deficiencies, seek common ground while reserving differences in daily life, learn from each other's strong points, and create a harmonious dormitory interpersonal relationship. A very important factor that causes disharmony in dormitory relations is self-centeredness and neglect of each other's feelings.
2. Master skills and behave appropriately.
We should strengthen moral cultivation and speech and behavior habits. A good word warms three winters, and a bad word hurts June. The same purpose, different statements, often produce different effects. Proper use of speech acts can optimize the process of interpersonal communication. Pay attention to the object, occasion and discretion of your speech, and don't hurt others' self-esteem excessively, which will lead to intensified contradictions. Try to use some interpersonal communication skills and interpersonal conflict communication skills to express your ideas calmly and tactfully.
3. Cultivate one's inner qualities
Harmonious dormitory relationship mainly depends on the internal quality of dormitory individuals, and interpersonal communication is the overall function of individual ability, psychology, thought and knowledge. Building a harmonious dormitory relationship requires everyone to work together, make concessions to each other, respect each other, help each other, and seek common ground while reserving differences. Do it: don't misrepresent others' shortcomings, insult others, pry into others' privacy (not curious), don't kill others' advantages (not jealous), don't ignore others' trivial matters (careful), don't hate others' mistakes (broad-minded), always put yourself in others' shoes and finally realize self-improvement.
From the school's point of view, we should do the following:
1. Strengthen mental health education and offer special lectures.
Special lectures and mental health education courses are held for college students to teach them the meaning, art, causes and coping strategies of interpersonal conflicts, so as to enrich their interpersonal knowledge, cultivate their excellent personality and psychological qualities such as respect, tolerance, understanding and trust, improve their interpersonal communication ability and interpersonal conflict resolution ability, and lay the foundation for establishing good dormitory interpersonal relations.
2. Establish an early warning mechanism for interpersonal conflicts.
Colleges and universities can establish a set of bottom-up interpersonal conflict intervention mechanism of "dormitory members, class cadres (psychological Committee members), counselors and psychological counseling centers" to find and properly solve interpersonal conflicts in college dormitories in time. Dormitory members and class cadres found and adjusted the contradictions at the first time and tried their best to resolve them. For complicated contradictions and conflicts that are difficult to solve in a short time, they can be reflected to the counselor in time. Counselors participate in conflict mediation in time, and after fully understanding the causes and processes of contradictions, they give necessary ideological education or psychological counseling to the parties concerned for specific problems. At the same time, you can ask the relevant teachers of the school psychological counseling center to give advice and treatment, and correct the cognitive and behavioral deviations of college students in time. For students who have serious psychological disorders and mental illness, they should contact professional psychotherapy institutions for psychotherapy in time.
3. Improve the status of ideological and political work
Although some college students are not very satisfied with their interpersonal relationships, even if they have interpersonal conflicts with dormitory members, they often choose to vent their anger on their friends or suffer silently. Only after the contradiction deepens and intensifies, do you report to the relevant teachers and ask for help. Students' ideological and political workers should take the initiative to go deep into students' dormitories, often have heart-to-heart talks with students, eliminate students' psychological worries, carry out various forms of ideological education on harmonious interpersonal relationships in time, and resolve potential interpersonal conflicts in dormitories in the bud.
4. Strengthen the construction of campus culture
Dormitory culture is an important part of campus culture construction, which is very important for mobilizing the enthusiasm of dormitory members, enhancing their cohesion and creativity, and creating harmonious and healthy dormitory interpersonal relationships. At the same time, from the perspective of management, it exerts influence on the dynamic process of interpersonal conflicts among college students and reduces the adverse effects of conflicts. For example, carry out dormitory culture festival, optimize dormitory environment and enhance cohesion; Conduct dormitory competition or psychological development training, optimize the psychological environment and promote dormitory unity.