1, vanity:
There is a saying: the pride of death, the pain of death. Because of some personality reasons, men have more or less a psychological tendency to covet superficial glory, which is called good feeling and good face. It doesn't matter, but the problem is that although men have different social circles and communication skills, most of them have excessive vanity.
Vanity is different from self-esteem. Self-esteem is a healthy self-protection psychology, which means that while opposing discrimination and insults from others, we can attach importance to ourselves and correctly and objectively understand and treat people and things around us. Vanity, on the other hand, maintains its false status in front of others with incorrect psychological needs A vain person can't see his own shortcomings and doesn't want others to correct them. He just wants to look good. As long as his face is good-looking, he will not distinguish the real motives of people around him, nor will he make a correct and objective estimation and evaluation of himself in time.
Therefore, men's vanity, whether sometimes manifested as the pursuit of self-satisfaction, or sometimes as eager to please and please others, is essentially a show to meet their psychological needs intentionally or unintentionally.
Vanity will make men become incomplete and not calm because they overestimate themselves, which will affect their life and work. Vanity men also listen to the wind and are used to superficial articles, which leads to partial listening and partial belief, stubborn opinions (men's stubbornness is actually a kind of vanity), and finally they are deceived.
Therefore, such people are often people who hurt others and dig their own traps.
Change method: down-to-earth, seeking truth from facts, not comparing with others, not following the trend, not overjoyed, and cultivating their calm and pragmatic character and courage. As the old saying goes, there is no dispute between gentlemen.
2. Narrowness:
That is, narrow-minded Narrowness of mind is a mental illness. A man who lacks vision and is good at getting into a dead end is easy to be careful of eye diseases.
Narrow-minded men often show selfishness and indecision in their behavior because they are afraid of their own losses, are too sensitive to others, are good at asking for and being dissatisfied, and even have doubts and jealousy about the benefits that others deserve, and sometimes even do not hesitate to slander and slander.
Therefore, narrow-minded men always treat themselves and the people and things around them in a deformed and distorted way of thinking, and sometimes they are irrationally in extreme emotions such as suspicion, jealousy, hysteria and withdrawn fear.
Narrow-minded men are generally very petty, unable to tolerate and listen to different opinions. In severe cases, they may eventually go to extremes due to serious psychological imbalance.
Narrow-minded people are not only the most stingy people, but also those who overcome themselves.
Ways to change: change your worries and paranoia, be open-minded, tolerant of others, be good at self-criticism, and take "step back and broaden the horizon" as the motto.
3. Inferiority:
Is that you look down on yourself. Men's inferiority complex caused by failure and poor skills. Once you suppress it in your heart, it becomes a habit and a man with inferiority.
Inferiority will make men negative and decadent, and even commit suicide. Men who love to complain or have the psychology of "the heart is higher than the sky and the life is thinner than paper" belong to inferiority complex.
There is also a man with inferiority complex, accompanied by a strong rebellious attitude. The external performance is like the hysteria of some women. He is used to doubting others and rejecting their opinions. He often pretends badly on the surface. In fact, he is self-abased, depressed and enterprising, and belongs to the kind of person who says that "the bricks in the toilet are smelly and hard" and it is difficult to recover. This kind of person's inferiority even dare not admit it.
In addition, because the essence of inferiority is a psychological state in which psychological needs are not met in time, people are angry with themselves or the people around them, and eventually lose confidence in themselves, once people develop the habit of inferiority, it is difficult to get out of the state of inferiority, become narrow-minded and lose initiative and enterprising spirit.
This kind of person should be the most hopeless person, because he has no confidence in himself.
Change methods: treat yourself correctly, cultivate good self-awareness, do what you can, dare to learn from others, and take "shame before courage" as the motto.
4. Cunning:
That is, the surface is kind, but actually the heart is insidious and vicious, commonly known as villain or quasi-villain.
An ambitious person or a person without correct self-awareness will inevitably form a cunning psychology in order to achieve personal goals, which will cause extremely serious harm to others and society.
Cunning psychology is actually a hint of self-existence, an incorrect sense of survival orientation and a clever and lucky psychological thinking mode. However, we should have an understanding of cunning people, that is, such people are easy to judge but difficult to deal with. This kind of person is generous and narrow-minded, good at pleasing others, flattering and grandstanding. In fact, when he is flexible in the face of small interests, he longs for greater interests. Generally thick-skinned, generous, like small groups, the surrounding individual small market is very developed. They are difficult to deal with, not because of themselves, but because of the social interpersonal situation: that is, gentlemen are eager to learn but not good at selling themselves, good people bow their heads without showing off themselves, mediocre people are ambitious but unable to make villains feel that they are a climate, and only cunning people are the most economical individualistic marketers. Judging from the actual communication, cunning people will not turn their faces easily with others, but they will turn their faces most. Unscrupulous people often turn against others, but they don't. It is inevitable for cunning people to turn their faces, and it is only a helpless means for those who are not cunning to turn their faces.
Cunning people often think that they are smooth, jealous and have ulterior motives in essence, and will do whatever it takes to achieve their personal goals. If such people are seen through by everyone and attacked by groups, they will be defeated and it will be difficult to restore their influence.
Because of their hypocrisy or hypocrisy, such people are the most recommended people.
Change methods: establish a correct outlook on life and values, adhere to the correct principles of being a man, do not be smart, and do things that harm others and benefit others. Remember: cleverness is mistaken by cleverness. As the saying goes, don't do to others what you don't want them to do to you.
Second, personality and attitude.
5. Arrogance:
That is, the character that always ignores the existence of others is synonymous with arrogance.
Arrogant men like to be proud and brag, but there is deep selfishness and inferiority in their hearts. They look down on others and worry that others will surpass them.
People often think that arrogance is the patent of capable people, but in fact incompetent people will disguise themselves with arrogance for personal purposes.
Arrogance will make men crazy and unscrupulous, and when they hurt others, they will also collapse themselves because they can't get help and are disappointed in the future. So arrogant people have the duality of being strong outside and being weak inside. Once they get achievements, they will be arrogant, lose their faith because of mediocrity, and become vulgar, helpless and negative.
Judging from the appearance of arrogant people, such people belong to the most vulnerable kind.
Change method: modest and prudent, not arrogant and impetuous, not vain, tolerant and peaceful. Proverb: Do things in a down-to-earth manner, and be a man with your tail between your legs.
6. Violence:
In other words, rudeness and arrogance are often combined with violence.
Violent men often treat people with anger and bandit spirit, thinking that they are overbearing, claiming to be the boss, self-righteous, never caring about other people's feelings, and even more unscrupulous. They always play the role of destroying harmony and trampling on civilization.
Anger and arrogance are twins. Violent people have no virtue because of ignorance. They can neither know themselves correctly nor treat others correctly, so they become arrogant and deceive themselves. Arrogant people become violent and self-deceiving because of their fragile psychology or incorrect setbacks and outlook on life. In fact, both of them are intentionally or unintentionally covering up their inner hypocrisy and emptiness in an incorrect way, just more violent.
Therefore, violent men lack education and humanity compared with arrogance. Such people are often selfish but not kind to themselves, and sometimes they are loyal but not kind to others.
In any case, such people are the most unreasonable people.
Change methods: start with education, pay attention to thinking about human nature, treat yourself as a person and treat others as people. Remember: the reason is not high.
7. Impulse:
That is, when something happens, you are not calm and emotional, that is, you always treat people and things around you rashly with an inherent attitude, no matter what the reason.
Due to the lack of experience, experience, career, self-cultivation and rational thinking ability, impulsiveness is a common problem for men, especially young men.
The formation and expression of impulse is related to congenital or genetic factors, as well as the acquired learning, training and education level. For example, the phrase "a novice is not afraid of tigers" is used to describe a brave person who is not deeply involved in the world. If you think about it from another angle, it is a powerful irony for a man who has never stopped at the novice stage. Impulse is the enemy of reason, and it is also a sign that men are immature. The so-called "one short step makes an everlasting regret" is the truth.
Impulsive people are poor in rational ability, vague in right and wrong, and lack of proper judgment and analysis ability, so they are easily driven by interests or used by people with ulterior motives. What is even more frightening is that impulsive people are often betrayed by people with ulterior motives after being labeled as loyal and righteous, while impulsive people turn a blind eye and think they are Lao Tzu's heroes, so they have the "Cold Second Artillery".
In this way, impulsive people should be the people who have the least value to do a good job.
Change methods: learn self-control, be calm when things happen, learn to distinguish right from wrong, and strengthen personal rational cultivation. With the help of others, we can also stop the impulsive phenomenon by desensitization and avoid forming impulsive habits. Old adage: Look before you leap.
8, wanton:
That is, unrestrained indulgence, commonly known as tantrums, regardless of children, let the temper come.
Arbitrariness is different from arrogance and anger. Arbitrariness is a lack of control over personality, and arrogance and rage are all a disguise of personality. When men were young, they were often spoiled too much and lacked good character education. If you don't control and guide him correctly, it is easy to form a reckless character in this environment.
There are also some men who have a strong revenge. Because they feel depressed for a long time, once they meet the opportunity of being released, they will change from some long-awaited unhealthy psychological habit to a reckless character, which is called the success of the villain. Therefore, wanton personality is directly related to its subjective and objective environment.
When a bohemian person encounters blows, setbacks, failures, troubles, etc. He is generally unable to extricate himself, but he is unwilling to sink into loneliness and become depressed and helpless. Sometimes it becomes grotesque and unruly, sometimes it loses its rationality and ignores common sense, which is very destructive.
Excessive indulgence will make men self-destruct their image and give up all their previous efforts. They are people who don't know how to cherish themselves.
Change methods: learn to treat yourself rationally and dialectically, and treat life from a positive and constructive perspective. Take "accumulate wealth and make little money" as the motto.
Third, behavior style.
9. Vulgar:
That is, interest is not high, language is vulgar, and behavior is unsightly.
Such men generally lack family education since childhood, ignore traditional morality, and even specialize in grandstanding with vulgar manners and words.
Although some people have received a good education, they can't correctly reflect their personal education level, and there will still be vulgarity in language and behavior, which is called filth.
Vulgarity is not only the root of human filth, but also the scum of social culture, which has a strong corrosive and destructive effect on the improvement of human civilization.
Vulgarity will also make use of people's "normal" psychology to make vulgarity habitual, popular and even fashionable, which will lead to the spread and spread of bad atmosphere.
Vulgarity can also be accompanied by obscenity. For example, many men regard obscenity as opening up and emancipating their minds, which is really a slander on civilization.
Therefore, vulgar people should be regarded as the people with the worst influence, because they are always destroying human civilization intentionally or unintentionally.
Change methods: re-accept traditional education, identify with social morality, get rid of dirty roots and bad habits, and take elegant, solemn, healthy and humorous style as personal code of conduct. As the old saying goes, three rescues a day.
10, impetuous:
It is frivolous and impatient, doing things without depth, incompleteness and ignorance.
Impetuousness is a common problem of men who think that their life and work are very comfortable, lacking health pursuit and social responsibility, and it is the residual poison left by pot rice. In addition, in the economic society, driven by power and interests, impetuous behavior of quick success and instant benefit has often been successful or muddled along, and impetuous atmosphere is very popular in today's society, especially among men with mediocre ability but great ambition.
Impetuous men often put personal interests and personal goals first, but ignore social responsibilities, thus causing harm to economic and social development and laying a major hidden danger.
Of course, impetuous men also have the self-knowledge of worrying about failure and the consciousness of being prepared for danger in times of peace, but they generally have no belief and behavior of being prepared for danger in times of peace. Because of their serious luck and speculative mentality, they often think they are smart, and even take advantage of others' loopholes to forget to respect others and learn from them. Sometimes they make fun of other people's hard work.
Therefore, impetuous men are the designers of formalism, who go through the motions and become desperate and ambitious speculators once they encounter interests.
Because of the lack of initiative and down-to-earth spirit, such people can never be entrusted with heavy responsibilities.
Change methods: get rid of the shortcomings of being smart, eager for quick success and instant benefit, establish a firm belief in being a man, and do not copy or plagiarize other people's labor achievements. The Analects of Confucius says: a gentleman is not arrogant if he is not heavy.
1 1, selfish:
That is, it is a behavioral phenomenon under the psychological state of taking oneself as the center and considering everything for oneself from a personal point of view.
Selfishness belongs to the most primitive animal nature, so it is difficult for selfish people to become noble. In the lower stage of mankind, selfishness is the proof of human evolution and the driving force of human social evolution, but now selfishness is the enemy of human evolution.
On the one hand, selfish men are unwilling to participate in dedication activities, showing no initiative and being more afraid of hurting themselves. On the other hand, they consciously or unconsciously take the way of taking, paying special attention to personal gains and losses, which is a bottomless pit to fill their dissatisfaction.
On the one hand, it is difficult for selfish men to integrate into this society where interpersonal communication plays an important role, on the other hand, once they enter the society, they will become hidden dangers in the world, and their selfish nature will cause great losses to others and society no matter how ostentatious it is.
Selfish men will become human moths without exception, but with different sizes and ranges.
As far as the relationship between people is concerned, such people are the most difficult to approach.
Ways to change: consciously restrain personal greed, participate in social dedication activities, pay attention to adjusting one's mentality in combination with dedication activities, and take overcoming oneself as the first psychological need. We must firmly believe that if we give someone a rose, there will be a fragrance in our hands.
12, any:
It is willful and unwilling to listen to other people's opinions.
The emergence of arbitrariness is rooted in profound personal cultivation, psychological character and way of thinking. In essence, arbitrariness is a concentrated expression of vulgar, impetuous and selfish behavior.
In the face of arbitrariness, people generally care about the temper and status of the actor, but rarely directly associate with many criticisms hidden behind arbitrary sexual behavior, which makes arbitrariness very deceptive. This kind of deception often makes people feel that arbitrariness is a character without much thought, but they don't know that arbitrariness is also a vulgar, impetuous and even selfish performance.
It is observed that the selfishness of an arbitrary man appears in the form of generosity, in the form of daring to take responsibility, and in the form of firmness, which actually hides his narrow-minded, arrogant and unscrupulous side.
From the perspective of employing people, autocratic men should be regarded as the most troublesome people, because they are not good at using team wisdom and correcting their shortcomings in time.
Change methods: listen to different opinions, get rid of your own vanity, deliberately follow other people's reasonable opinions, and learn to tolerate others. As the old saying goes, there must be a teacher in a threesome.
Fourth, living habits.
13, negative number:
That is, a long-term inactive, depressed and pessimistic life and work state.
Negativity is an extreme manifestation of a man's awareness of his incompetence or inability to reach the peak. It is an unhealthy psychological and behavioral habit, which is most likely to appear when he is helpless and lacks initiative.
There are many factors that cause negative psychology and habits. One of the most important factors is the unhealthy mentality caused by individuals not working hard enough or being dissatisfied with their interests.
Men who easily become negative are also men with strong vanity, selfishness and narrow mentality, even men who wait for revenge because their ambitions have not been realized. These people are afraid of others' success, but they don't work hard. Therefore, not only do they not participate in things, they are not enthusiastic about people, but they also muddle along until they live in seclusion. Sometimes they will directly play the role of being extremely corrupt, passive and dragging their feet, and sometimes they will not hesitate to play the principal offender of sabotage activities, which will make people fall short.
Therefore, negative men are the most frustrating people.
Change method: adjust your life, value yourself and others, and form a good habit of loving to do things. The motto is "Heaven is healthy, and gentlemen strive for self-improvement".
14, lazy:
Just don't work hard, don't love labor, and don't make progress.
Laziness is a bad habit caused by pampering and parasitic psychology in childhood, and an idle and idle habit caused by spiritual emptiness and lack of confidence in individuals in adulthood.
Lazy men do nothing all day and are the most despised people.
Change the method: do your own thing right away, without others doing it for you, and put an end to parasitic psychology. As the old saying goes, industrious people are industrious.
15, sloppy:
It is a bad habit of not paying attention to hygiene, slovenly, and not knowing how to cherish your image.
Sloppy is also an uncivilized and impolite behavior habit. When it seriously affects the surrounding environment and often causes visual pollution to others, it becomes a bad moral habit.
Sloppy men are people who don't pay attention to personal cultivation and spoil their fun.
Change method: pay attention to personal and environmental hygiene actively, cherish the feelings of people around you, and completely change yourself from the mental outlook. Motto: Image is a person's first face.
16, addiction:
That is, living habits marked by bad behaviors and hobbies, such as smoking, drinking, gambling, stealing, greedy for money, lasciviousness, debauchery and whoring.
Addiction is a morbid habit, and it is easy for empty and lazy people to catch it.
Once a man is addicted to evil, it is difficult to extricate himself, and he is most likely to be used in a good way by people with ulterior motives.
Men with bad hobbies often bring bad consequences to individuals, society and families.
No matter what one's personal achievements are, he will eventually give up on himself.
Change method: quit bad habits and cultivate healthy hobbies. Remember: addiction is a time bomb that you carry with you, and people who can bear great responsibilities must never catch it. Rumor: flies don't bite unstitched eggs.