Raising boys, many mothers are the first two. It seems that he has a permanent battery, and it keeps making noise. It was quiet for a minute, and I don't know what disaster it was. I always worry that he will get into trouble, but I still want to drive him crazy. ...
There is a boy, how to raise him?
1
Give your boy more hugs.
Some mothers think this way: the little boy who has just been born for more than a month has begun to look around, but rarely pays attention to his mother. He probably doesn't need his mother to hug him.
Fact: Boys need more hugs. /kloc-before 0/year and a half, you should not spoil your son too much. He looks at you less, seems less dependent on you, and is easily attracted by other things. He prefers to look at those moving objects on your face. But in fact, boys' brains develop more slowly than girls', so their emotions are more fragile than girls' and need more care. His skin needs to be satisfied by touching and needs enough security. He wants you to show him around, so give him more hugs.
2
Understand the boy's risky behavior
Some mothers think that this boy is very naughty. Take him out to play, he always likes to do some dangerous actions, such as climbing high and jumping from a height. Mothers stopped their behavior because they were worried about his safety.
Fact: Traditionally, people in China always ask their children to be quiet and always try to restrain their behavior. In fact, you should always think that our little boy is an ancient little hunter. They need vast space and freedom of movement. They rely on exercise and climbing to develop their brains healthily. Mom and dad, don't tie him down. You need to protect his safety as much as possible without disturbing him, and trust his natural spatial judgment. At the same time, encourage your little hunter to take part in more sports and run outdoors. Various sensory comprehensive experiences will bring him more healthy development.
three
Let the boy walk into the group
Some mothers think that most families now have only one child. For the sake of love and safety, many mothers don't like to let their children play at home or outside.
Fact: Boys are naturally gregarious animals. They are born to live in groups. They learn to socialize, learn to love, learn to live, learn to be responsible, learn to be moral, and learn to find their place in the group. If boys don't learn to deal with group relationships and lack group consciousness in childhood, they won't know how to develop good interpersonal relationships and can't maintain harmonious relationships with others in the future. They are looking for a group that can relax themselves, give him tasks and make him proud. Parents should appropriately encourage them to participate in actively competitive activities, such as sports activities, so that they can find out who they are. Parents can also design challenging tasks so that children can learn their abilities, skills and sense of responsibility in a challenging and interesting atmosphere.
four
Understand the boy's stubbornness
Some mothers think that a 2-year-old boy has always wanted to climb the tall fairy tale castle. But he is too young. Mom told him that you can't play this yet. But the boy didn't seem to hear, and still looked at the castle. The mother dragged the child away.
Fact: If you can't do something, you must try it. This is the role of testosterone. From infancy, boys don't accept setbacks like girls, and they don't like to accept help from others. Usually, he clearly knows that he can't do it, but he can't accept it quickly emotionally. He has to keep trying. Boys deal with emotions much slower than girls. At this time, mother should trust our little hunter's self-judgment ability and give him enough time to adjust his mentality. After he accepts the fact, he will leave on his own. Only when you drag him away or force him to accept your help will he feel really frustrated.
five
You know, his hearing is not as good as yours.
Some mothers think like this: you said it several times, but he didn't hear it. You think he didn't listen to you on purpose, so you are angry.
Fact: He just didn't hear it. Boys are not as good at listening as girls, especially when they are absorbed in one thing, they can't hear the second voice at all. Don't yell at him at this time. The more you yell at him, the more he rejects this strange noise. You have to walk over, squat down, look into his eyes, hold his hand, talk to him gently, let him have visual, tactile and auditory stimulation at the same time, and then he will shift his attention from other things to you.
six
Be considerate of boys' special expressions.
Some mothers think that they are dissatisfied with you or in a bad mood, and they will slam the door, smash things, make a hullabaloo about, and even knock on the wall. So you reprimanded him and started a race in your throat.
Fact: Because of the effect of testosterone in the body, boys are more likely to get angry than girls and need to vent more. Aggressiveness, adventure and competition are the nature of boys. A boy uses his body to express his feelings. He doesn't express emotions like "I'm angry" and "I'm sorry" in words like girls. Even if he shows his love for you, he may just pull your skirt. Sometimes boys throw things when they are very happy, which is the role of testosterone and the normal behavior of this little man when he grows up.
Boys aged 2-5 will show their personality more and more. At this time, children get angry easily. Parents should not suppress his resistance, otherwise it may ruin his personality all his life. You should tell him what is a better expression. He has the ability, responsibility and time to adjust himself. At the same time, give him a chance to vent, allow him to yell, and even designate a sofa or sandbag for him to beat.
seven
Give boys excellent male idols
Some mothers think that there are always many women in a boy's world, such as mothers, grandmothers, nurses, kindergarten teachers and so on. These women will give their children the best care. What else does he need?
Fact: At different stages of life, boys always look for a man around them as an example to follow. In the past, male family members often played this role. In today's one-child families, most boys lack male relatives like uncles. A male role model may be a family friend or a child's teacher. When a boy says something like "I like a man" or "XXX is fine", parents need to examine whether this person's outlook on life and values can be recognized. Because the boys all take him as an example.
eight
Help the boy express his sympathy.
Some mothers think that the kitten is ill, and the little girl next door keeps stroking the kitten, showing infinite sympathy. The son looked on coldly, which showed that the boy was indifferent by nature.
Fact: Boys are also compassionate, but the real society has severely suppressed their compassion. Boys seldom express their worries through language and listening as girls do. They pay more attention to what they can do for each other and give them practical help. When you are in a bad mood or in poor health, your daughter may accompany you and say some sweet words to you, but your son will express his love for you with practical actions. Maybe he will clumsily pour you a glass of water, or maybe he will take the initiative to pack his toys, indicating that he doesn't have to worry about his mother.
Knowing this characteristic of boys will also help us to understand the adult men in our family, such as father and husband. Next time you expect flowers, but your lover bought you roast duck, maybe you will be less resentful and more grateful.
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nine
Help boys understand their heroism.
Some mothers think that their 4-year-old son likes to bear the brunt of everything. The child is too reckless.
Fact: This is a boy's instinctive reaction. Boys discover "who I am" and their "personal strength" through "self-sacrifice". They are harmonious and friendly in their struggle and can devote themselves to their ideals. So parents should tell them the scale of adventure and mission, arrange some small tasks for them, such as "taking out the garbage", and tell him that these small tasks can also make their families comfortable.
Boys who have no worries about food and clothing can only learn a little adventurous spirit and lack a sense of mission. Parents should encourage boys to discover their self-worth and realize it.
In encouragement, tell him that the most meaningful thing is the process of realizing value, not the final result.
10
Teach boys to learn self-discipline
Some mothers think this way: as soon as the little sister next door entered the room, her son waved his "golden hoop stick" and hit it. A rude child should be taught a lesson.
Fact: Boys are very aggressive. Parents should educate our children to know their own values and the norms that govern their behavior. We can realize the boy's self-discipline by teaching him values and morality. TV programs and good stories can tell him what behavior is good.
One more thing, parents should not use other children to distract their children. For example, a 2-year-old boy insisted on climbing stairs, and his parents were afraid of danger, so they used "other children stole his car" to divert their attention. The little boy's attention was successfully diverted, but he was very aggressive to this "other child" and waved to fight every time he saw it. In fact, this "other kid" is only 10 months old, and she is still a soft and cute girl who has no interest in cars at all. ...
Whether raising a boy or a girl, it is necessary for every parent to understand the development law of the child and observe the motivation behind the child's behavior. If you want to know children better, you need to really play with them besides reading some books related to their behavior development. Learn about children's behavior language while playing.
One more thing, don't label children. Boys are hard to raise and girls are easy to take care of. Actually, not necessarily. Every child has his own personality characteristics. According to the characteristics of their children, targeted education is necessary.