Left-behind children are a special vulnerable group in the social transformation period in China. At present, with the deepening of urban and rural economic system reform and the acceleration of China's modernization process, the population is also moving on a large scale. They go out to work and do business, leaving their children in their original place of residence and entrusting them to grandparents or other relatives for care. These left-behind children are in a critical period of growth and development, unable to enjoy the guidance and help of their parents in ideological understanding and values, lacking emotional attention and care from their parents in the process of growth, prone to deviation in understanding and values, abnormal personality and psychological development, and some people may even embark on the road of breaking the law and committing crimes. The mental health problems of left-behind children in rural areas are becoming more and more serious, which has become a social problem that can not be ignored.
First, the main manifestations of psychological problems of left-behind children
1. Inferiority is common. According to a survey of some left-behind children in rural areas, most of them have a serious sense of inferiority. Because my parents are not around for a long time, I feel helpless and protective. Therefore, compared with children with parents around, they are prone to psychological barriers of inferiority. Once inferiority complex is formed, it will exist as a negative emotional experience. They feel very lonely and have an unhealthy psychology of extreme inferiority. This is very unfavorable for children's future study, growth and physical and mental health.
2. withdrawn personality and weird behavior. Left-behind children, because their parents are not around for a long time, lack the minimum psychological communication opportunities and the objects to talk to and ask for help, and their inner troubles and conflicts can not be talked about and guided, resulting in a lack of security and trust in the outside world. This lack of emotion has seriously affected their social interaction with others. They are timid, cowardly, closed-minded, indifferent, withdrawn and lack initiative in love and communication. On the other hand, children are impatient and impulsive because they are not bound by their parents. They often escalate unprovoked trivial matters into fighting, beating and scolding classmates and even teachers and elders on the grounds that they are "too boring". A very small number of left-behind children have been influenced by social bad gangs and have violated discipline or committed crimes.
3. The rebellious mentality is serious. Left-behind children have a strong rebellious mentality and a serious confrontational mood. They are insecure, full of doubts about everything around them, always look at the world with colored glasses, and even more full of distrust of the relationship between people. This subconscious distrust has seriously affected children's social interaction with others, and even feels that they have been abandoned by society and others, resulting in rebellious psychology and hatred for society. They turned a deaf ear to the discipline of their families and teachers, and even contradicted teachers and parents in public to show their resistance and cynicism. Many left-behind children have poor performance in school, low personality, frequent violation of discipline, arrogance, unsociable, and no collectivism concept. Some of them have also developed bad habits such as smoking, drinking and indulging in online games. Often, many left-behind children are more independent and stronger than other children on the surface, but they are more fragile and vulnerable than other children on the inside. Their mentality is extremely unbalanced, their mood fluctuates greatly, and they are easily hurt in social communication with others, resulting in rebellious psychology and hatred, which leads to bad habits, and some even go astray and embark on the road of illegal crimes.
Children are the future and hope of the motherland, and left-behind children are related to the whole rural education and social progress. At present, these psychological problems of left-behind children will not only cause psychological harm and unstable factors to left-behind children, but also bring hidden dangers to the construction of a harmonious society, and correct measures must be taken to prevent them.
Second, to solve the psychological problems of rural left-behind children countermeasures
1. Accelerate the reform of the household registration system and abolish the unreasonable household registration system. Removing the restrictions on the children of migrant workers in cities, speeding up the reform of the current compulsory education system in China, realizing a national compulsory education system with urban and rural equity and regional equity, encouraging migrant workers to live and study with their children, and ensuring a good family education are the most powerful guarantees for children's mental health development, so that all "left-behind children" do not have to "stay behind".
2. Strengthen family education and give more care to left-behind children. Parents are the first teachers of the children. Good family education is the responsibility of parents and guardians. Parents, especially those who go out to work, should always communicate with their children. In addition to caring about children's life, body and study, we should pay more attention to emotional communication and psychological communication with children, so that children can always feel the care and love of their parents. This not only helps to relieve their nervousness and anxiety, but also helps children to understand their parents' hardships, their hard-won lives, understand and respect their parents and form a correct outlook on life and values by telling their own work experiences. On the other hand, grandparents or other relatives who are in charge of guardianship should treat their children democratically and equally, truly shoulder the responsibility and obligation of raising children, and should not overindulge and indulge them, and should give them scientific management and guidance, thus shaping their healthy psychology and noble personality.
3. Take school education as the leading factor and give play to the educational function of the school. As an educational institution for left-behind children, schools should improve the concept of health education and take mental health education as the main way of moral education. Schools should make full use of various educational resources and carry out various forms of mental health education for left-behind children. First of all, schools should strengthen the quality training of teachers, so that teachers can have good psychological quality, give full play to their educational advantages, treat every student fairly and equally, give psychological consideration and warmth, relieve their psychological pressure in time, let children have stable emotions and positive emotions, create a harmonious family atmosphere and meet their spiritual needs. Teachers themselves should pay more attention to setting an example, rather than teaching by example, to provide a good example for children, to become an example of mental health in children's minds, and to guide children's physical and mental health development. Every teacher should also make full use of the relevant knowledge in the teaching materials to provide students with timely mental health education, so that mental health education can be everywhere, so as to better promote the healthy growth of each student's body and mind. Secondly, the school should organize the class teacher to establish the mental health files and follow-up management files of left-behind children, keep abreast of the overall mental health status of left-behind children, and conduct targeted intervention and management on common psychological and behavioral problems. Third, the school should set up a special psychological counseling room, equipped with professional psychological counseling and consulting teachers, to provide psychological counseling and consulting services for all teachers and students. Fourth, pay attention to the training of parents and other guardians of left-behind children, so that they can correct their educational concepts, master the methods and skills of communication with children, and combine home and school to better educate children.
4. Left-behind children should strengthen psychological quality training. The mental health education of left-behind children depends on internal factors. I think left-behind children should learn to adjust their mentality, learn to be self-confident, self-reliant and self-reliant, take the reality that their parents are not around as their own exercise and test, learn to correctly handle setbacks and adversity, cultivate strong will, set goals for themselves, cultivate various interests, correct their learning attitude, actively communicate with their parents and improve their independence.
5. Integrate social forces and build a love education platform for left-behind children. In view of the current situation of weak social education, lack of educational resources and outdated educational concepts in some rural areas, the government should formulate relevant policies, organically combine family, school and society through policy encouragement and guidance, and strive to make social education, school education and family education work together to promote the healthy development of left-behind children.
Mental health education for left-behind children is a long-term systematic project. It is necessary to strengthen the contact between families, schools and all walks of life, so that the whole society can create a healthy and warm living environment for left-behind children, like the spring rain that knows the season, moisten the hearts of every left-behind child in rural areas with sincere love, light up the heart lights of every left-behind child with enthusiastic fire, guide the voyage of children's life, dispel ignorance, harvest hope and harvest harvest.
Expanding reading: how to care about the psychology of left-behind children
1: Out of control
"Left-behind children" lack the sunshine that their parents care about and are separated from their parents for a long time when they are young. Their parents go out to work to make a living, but they are left at home in the countryside, spending little time with their parents. There is no correct guidance in emotion and psychological deficiency, which makes them resist or even attack the social imbalance. Some weak-willed children always feel that others are bullying them and haggle over every ounce. They often have a strong rebellious attitude towards the discipline and criticism of teachers, guardians, relatives and friends, and often have a tendency to violence in serious cases. Inner sensitivity and fragility have influenced these children for a long time.
2. Self-enclosed
Loneliness, indifference, rambling ... When these words with dark tones are concentrated on some left-behind children in rural areas, their prominent psychological problems cannot be ignored. The instability of family environment makes them lack sense of security and belonging, which brings a strong sense of loneliness. Without the closest relatives to communicate with and being excluded by other friends, weak and helpless children can only completely isolate themselves from this strange world and protect themselves. Long-term reticence, reticence, anxiety and nervousness can easily make these children form withdrawn, inferior and closed psychology. Over time, they become wary and hostile to the people around them.
3. Cognitive bias
Lack of parents' attention and corresponding family education, lack of discipline, no tutor at home, poor academic performance, and inner sensitivity and confusion. A few left-behind children are extremely disgusted with their parents' departure. Even after my parents came home, they were alienated and emotionally alienated. It is difficult to establish a normal outlook on life and values in an age when their personalities are qualitative. It is also the reason why the truancy rate and dropout rate of left-behind children in today's society are rising.
Paying attention to left-behind children depends on the joint efforts of the whole society. The psychological problems of left-behind children are not caused by one day or two. If we can rely on the spiritual cultivation of the school, the concern of the society and the assistance of our parents, we will not discriminate and alienate from the heart, and the flowers will bloom beautifully. Of course, we also advise some parents who are busy making money and have little communication with their children to take responsibility. After all, you are the best teachers for children.
In view of the above reasons, we can strengthen the mental health education of left-behind children from the following aspects:
First, build a bridge of parent-child communication, so that children can feel that their parents are around.
As the saying goes, parents are children's first teachers. Good parent-child relationship can promote the healthy development of children's body and mind, on the contrary, it will hinder the development of children. In order to make "left-behind children" grow up healthily and happily like other children, parents should keep in touch with their children as much as possible even if they can't be with them. Care about his life, understand his thoughts, let them feel the care of their parents all the time, and correctly guide their children to grow up healthily. Once, the parents of left-behind children communicated with their children like this: they called their children at a fixed time every day and cared about their food, clothing, housing and study. And give children an in-depth communication once a week to help them sort out the problems they encounter and give them the correct methods to solve problems and the truth of being a man. In addition, during the winter vacation and summer vacation, he also tried his best to bring his children to his side and let them live with him. If you have time, you can also take your children out for a walk, increase your knowledge, broaden your horizons, and let your children know more in a broader space. This lasted for five years. In the past five years, parents not only know their children like the palm of their hand, but also have deep feelings for them, which has promoted their healthy and happy growth. Moreover, this child has always been lively and cheerful, even better than many students who are not left behind.
Second, strengthen communication between parents and guardians and implement education for children.
Guardian is the direct manager of left-behind children, and his management attitude directly affects the development of left-behind children. Parents and guardians of left-behind children often exchange views on children's education, which is helpful for both sides to reach an understanding on children's education, promote the implementation of guardianship tasks and promote the healthy growth of children. If we often communicate with grandparents of left-behind children, we can not only understand their behavior and ideology at home, but also let the elderly learn modern educational methods. When problems are found, the two sides can sort them out in time and discuss more appropriate education methods. If we often exchange views with relatives and friends who take care of children, we can better understand the children's way of dealing with people, and also let guardians know the parents' educational wishes, gain educational knowledge and promote the implementation of children's education.
Xiaochao's parents went out to work when he was 2 years old, and he has been living with his grandparents ever since. Grandparents are busy in the fields every day. Xiaochao either plays mud with his grandparents in the field or plays around with children of the same age. Four years later, Xiao Chao entered the first grade, and his mother came back to take him to school to register. She found Xiao Chao's behavior habit is very bad, he loves to curse and climb on the ground ... When he mentioned him, he was still very unhappy and rolled on the ground. Mom asked grandma, and grandma said he always did. Just coax him. Mother feels very uncomfortable. She found the father of the child, sat down and had a good talk with her parents for a day, so that the elderly parents understood that in addition to taking care of their children's food, clothing, housing and transportation, they should pay more attention to their children's thoughts and behaviors and strictly educate them. And provide parents with some educational methods that they think are appropriate. Under the constant reminder of his son and daughter-in-law, grandparents strengthened the education of Xiaochao's behavior habits. After a period of time, Xiao Chao's swearing frequency was obviously reduced, and his clothes were much cleaner, and the educational effect was very obvious.
Third, create appropriate frustration scenarios to cultivate the ability of left-behind children to bear setbacks.
Today's children are loved by families and society. They were praised more and criticized less when they were young. Excessive protection makes them not know what it is like to be frustrated, and they are at a loss and panic in the face of difficulties. Left-behind children encounter more problems than children of the same age in all aspects, and often lack timely guidance from their parents when encountering difficulties, so it is more important to cultivate their frustration ability. In education, we can skillfully create situations, such as setting difficult problems and creating setbacks, so that left-behind children are not timid and helpless, nor are they plain sailing and easy, but they need to work hard and overcome certain difficulties to get them, thus enhancing their psychological endurance and making them know how to meet difficult challenges and adapt to all kinds of unexpected problems that often appear in life.
Wang Xiaohu, a left-behind child, is a crybaby. In Chinese class, the teacher taught me to write "knowing, writing, recognizing and knowing". Most of the children finished writing and went out for activities, while Wang Xiaohu and two other children were still writing absently. The teacher urged them to concentrate on their writing. After a while, the two children also finished writing and went out to play happily. When Wang Hu saw that there was only one child left in the classroom, he began to worry. He looked down and cried as he wrote. The teacher knows that he has a strong self-esteem and doesn't want to fall behind others. He also knows that his hands-on ability is poor and he doesn't like writing. The teacher came up to him gently, and instead of scolding him, he smiled and encouraged him, saying, "You wrote very hard today, and you still have two words to finish." I believe you will write faster next time and go out to play with other children. With the help and encouragement of the teacher, Wang Xiaohu finished writing in a short time and played happily with his friends. In the future, as long as the teacher finds that his writing has made a little progress, he will praise him in class and help him patiently when he finds that he has problems. Slowly, Wang Xiaohu was not afraid of writing, and the speed of writing changed greatly.
Fourth, give children ways to adjust their emotions and cultivate the ability of left-behind children to adjust their emotions.
Being good at regulating and controlling one's emotions is helpful for children to establish good interpersonal relationships and is beneficial to their mental health. However, the conflict between children is largely due to the inability to control their emotions at that time, especially the impulsive children. Left-behind children are often impulsive because they are often not cared for by their parents and lack guidance. They tend to intensify and amplify contradictions for a little thing, leaving their interpersonal relationships in a relatively tense and passive state, which is not conducive to their healthy growth. Therefore, it is particularly important to cultivate the emotional adjustment ability of left-behind children.
The most direct and effective way to cultivate left-behind children's emotional adjustment ability is to seize the opportunity and teach them some simple and easy emotional adjustment methods and strategies. For example, for those students who are impulsive, you can ask a steady classmate to remind themselves before they are emotional; When you feel too stressed, you can relieve it by keeping a diary and talking. When they are depressed, they can listen to music and take a walk ... Let them master some specific emotional control methods, which can relieve their inner pressure, reduce conflicts in interpersonal communication, help them live in harmony with other children, and greatly reduce the possibility of psychological problems.
Fifth, give children ways to get along with others and let left-behind children learn interpersonal communication.
Everyone lives in society and needs the care, support and attention of others, so it is inevitable to communicate with others. Good interpersonal relationship is not only an indispensable condition for mental health, but also an important way to obtain mental health. Most of the left-behind children are introverted, not good at expression and communication, a little hit, imprisoned in their hearts, locked in their houses, and unwilling to see anyone. If it goes on for a long time, the ideological pressure is heavy and the burden is heavy, so they can't grow up healthily. Therefore, it is very necessary for left-behind children to learn how to communicate with others.
Let the left-behind children learn interpersonal communication, first of all, let them realize each other's rights and responsibilities in the process of interpersonal communication, treat each other as equals and respect others as they respect themselves. Secondly, be willing to associate with others, be able to cooperate with peers, and be able to communicate with teachers and parents. At the same time, let them understand that they should not only consider their own needs in interpersonal communication, but also care about the needs of others and know how to be considerate of others. Thirdly, let the left-behind children learn some correct communication skills and effective communication attitudes, tolerate others, praise others sincerely and accept well-intentioned criticism. Finally, let them keep their personality independent and complete in interpersonal communication. Because of the different living environment, everyone has his own unique personality and behavior pattern. When dealing with others, he can accommodate others appropriately. Easy-going attitude is necessary in interpersonal communication, but this accommodation is limited. Easy-going doesn't mean giving up principles, let alone losing his complete personality.
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