What is the real soul love (relationship essential)
1. soul love, really help level up?
Recently, Luo Xiang has a video is relatively hot, the theme is
"real love is to help level up"
What is the meaning of this sentence
This idea comes from Socrates, Socrates believes that the level of love
As if the ladder, physical love. Material love is the lower rung
and soul love is the higher rung, and perhaps many times we start with physical
or material love and have access to soul or spiritual "love"
but that doesn't mean that physical or material love is evil or worthless
It is simply a basis for mutual attraction. Maybe from outward attraction
physical attraction can gradually reach to spiritual or soul attraction
but if you just stop at physical love, then maybe you will end up
as the old King of the Seas, who has seen all the sex but still feels empty
Well, after reading such a big paragraph, my feeling is that
this is a piece of nonsense that is beyond right
2. p>
2. How to find the entrance to soul love
That is, you think, yeah, yeah, that makes sense
And yet, what is soul love? I still don't know
It sounds easy to go up the ladder
But where do I find the entrance from the body to the soul
Is it soul love when two people talk about theories and knowledge and music and art all day long?
Is it soul love when two people talk about art? Doesn't someone who doesn't love art and theory, who doesn't read much
deserve soul love? Although I don't read a lot, I don't read a lot either
I'm about the middle of the pack
I'd like to think that I have a little bit of a say in the matter
After years of reading and socializing and counseling
I'll be bold and open up a can of worms: in fact, the love of the soul and the love of the spirit
is not necessarily related to knowledge, theory, or art
The love of the soul and the love of the spirit are not necessarily related to knowledge, theory, or art. These things are just carriers of the soul and spirit
and not the soul and spirit itself
"Soul love" is a bit of a mystery, but I think that clarifying the following questions
may provide some direction in the search for this kind of love
3. p>3. The basis of soul love: the existence of two separate souls
First of all, the basis for two people to be able to have soul love is
that they have to have two separate souls
This is not simple. In relationships, we often see a relationship model
called "controlling and being controlled," where one person does not allow the other person to
have a separate soul, and wants the other person to be an extension of his or her own will
When control fails, the person who is controlling will feel that "The other person doesn't love me anymore
and isn't my soul mate anymore", not realizing that maybe he doesn't even allow the other person to have a separate soul, so how can he talk about a soul mate?
This kind of control includes, but is not limited to, the following feelings
Because we love each other, you have to listen to me; because we love each other
so you have to know what's in my heart and satisfy me
Because we love each other, I have to surround you, and I have to be very concerned about every move you make
;because we love each other
Since we love each other, we have to like the same things...
It's true that there are moments in a relationship when you want to control the other person
It's just that we need to understand that when you want to control the other person at first
Or if you feel that the other person is controlling you
Don't be so sure to talk about soul love...
There is no doubt in my mind that the love of the soul is the most important part of a relationship.
4. Soulful understanding
There is a friend, his parents love each other for decades, the relationship is very good
But the old two have completely different interests, when the old man in the home to watch the game
The old lady in the downstairs dancing, mutual respect, do not interfere with each other
The daily exchanges are nothing more than the daily meals, the trivialities
These two
They don't force each other to agree with them. It doesn't seem like "soul love" at all, but I think this kind of respect, tolerance, leaving space
is a kind of "soul" understanding in itself
Besides controlling and being controlled, there's also exploiting and being exploited!
The feeling of exploiting and being exploited is also a killer of "soul love"
For example, in a marriage, it is necessary to value the other person's economic base
This is part of the so-called "material love"
But if you only use the other person as a tool to achieve your own economic goals
But if you only use the other person as a tool to achieve your own economic goals
The other person's economic base is also a killer of "soul love".
But if you only use the other person as a tool to achieve your own financial goals,
and only focus on the material conditions that the other person provides for you,
then since it is a "tool"
there is really no "soul" in it,
at least for the "tool" of the person. For the user of the "tool"
these feelings of being controlled, exploited, and utilized
may not be entirely true, but if they are only the internal feelings of one partner
it also suggests that there are dynamics in the relationship that are not sufficiently independent and equal to be
sorted out and recognized. sorted out and realized.
5. The core of soul love is to dare to remove the armor of defense
The so-called "soul love" step, I think the important thing is not to
Increase their own cultural literacy, and develop a few hobbies that the other party likes
Instead, it is to go back to basics, and directly see the
Simply put, how much of your true
and vulnerable self you dare to expose in front of the other person, how much of the possibility of obtaining the "soul love"
When we only want our lover to see our own noble, strong and beautiful "soul"
When we only want our lover to see our own high, strong and beautiful "soul"
When we only want our lover to see our own high, strong and beautiful "soul"
When we only want our loved ones to see our high, strong, and beautiful "souls"
, maybe you are still far away from each other's true souls
Only when we are truly willing to let each other see our own vulnerability, helplessness
and even some of the unpleasantness, then we may be able to have a true "soul friendship"
but It's not easy to remove all the defenses you've armed yourself with over the years in order to survive
In the TV series My First Half Life,
Tang Jing and He Han were a couple that seemed
to be a good match, no matter what they looked like, whether it was in terms of appearance, knowledge, taste, ability,
all of which fulfilled the conditions of "soul mates"
. "
6. Soul Exchange
However, compared to lovers, Tang Jing always puts He Han in the position of a competitor
When she wins the business but loses He Han, she can't help but cry bitterly
But when she turns her face to face He Han, she looks like a light hearted person
Finding a He Han's classmates date, far away from Hong Kong
Trying his best to show: I don't care about losing you
This is Tang Pin's defense, underneath this strong defense
is the fragile little woman who is longing for love, however, Tang Pin can't face He Han
Really able to let this little woman come out even if it's just a probe
When the fragile side of his own heart
When you can never face your lover
and you can't tell your lover what you need, the two "souls"
not only pass by each other, but also drift apart
including what I said earlier about controlling, exploiting, and taking advantage of the other half in a relationship
is actually a way of hiding your inner vulnerability
in relationships. The so-called "Soul Connection" will be impossible for a soul that is heavily armored, even in the presence of someone close to it
7. p>
The real love of soul does not need to go up
it needs to go down to the deepest and most vulnerable part of the heart
If you dare to open up these corners of your soul to your beloved
and you are willing and able to go through the seemingly hard armor of your beloved
to understand these corners of your soul, then you will be able to understand your soul. Soul love" really happens
This kind of "soul love" may not be detached from the physical body, or from material things
It may be a warm physical contact, or it may be a carefully prepared meal
This kind of "soul love" may not be detached from the physical body, or from material things. "Soul love" is also the process of rediscovering your partner
You may have idealized
expectations of each other because of all the good qualities of the other person, and as you get close to each other, you continue to discover the shortcomings that lead to the destruction of the idealization
After this, perhaps you have the opportunity to get to know a real
There is also a chance to get close to the soul of this "person"
One of the visitors always felt that her husband was very cold to her
such as the video phone call, never smiled, a poker face
There is also a chance to get close to the soul of this "person".
8. Being able to read each other's unique love language
On one occasion, she suddenly made a discovery
She saw her husband pursing his lips when she answered the video phone call
This was the same as the expression on his face when he was too embarrassed to hold back his smile on a certain occasion
She suddenly realized that her husband was actually happy when he received the video phone call
He was only masking his emotion by his cold face. His cold face was just a cover for his emotions
This small discovery touched her
And she understood more about the way this man showed his feelings
She no longer needed him to express his emotions in the way he wanted to express his feelings
But she could read and understand the unique language of love that belongs to the other man
This kind of "understanding" is more important than the one she got from her husband, which was the same as the smile he was too embarrassed to hold back on one occasion. "Understanding" is much more grounded and closer to each other's souls than talking about life and ideals and reading when we first met
.