Massive classic!
I am in the jungle, but the jungle has no legend about me!
1. A person's life is like taking a shit, sometimes you've worked hard but what comes out is just a fart.
2. Hourly, my family is very poor, no money to buy a bicycle, I had to fight every day to go to school. When I was in junior high school, because my results were too outstanding, the school leadership kept me for two more years. After graduating from junior high school, the principal of the high school thought I had a promising future and charged me an extra 30,000 dollars. When I was in my senior year of high school, the homeroom teacher thought that I already had the ability to survive independently, so he let me quit school.
3. The advertisement of a flower store: Today, the roses in our store are sold at the cheapest price, and you can even buy a few for your wife.
4. The only difference between Superman and me is that I wear my underwear inside out!
5. The effect of contraception: if you don't succeed, you will become a man.
6. I am not a casual person! But if you are, you are not a human being!
7. Though you are the teeth! Don't feel sorry for yourself! The teeth can plan the groundnut, rain can cover the chin, tea can be separated from the tea residue, picnic can be a knife and fork, you say that the teeth are not the top of the list!
8. Family Shunzhi, life Kangxi, character Yongzheng, career Qianlong, everything Jiaqing, the future Daoguang, wealth Xianfeng, inside and outside the Tongzhi, a thousand years Guangxu, ten thousand Xuantong!
9. I am a green onion, standing in the wind and rain, who dares to take me dipped in soy sauce, X his ancestors! I have traveled to the south ~ broke through the north ~ behind the toilet drank water, train tracks on the leg pressure, but also kissed the fool. I've been to the mountains, I've fought tigers, I've practiced martial arts at the Shaolin Temple, I've been to the left of the Blue Dragon, I've been to the right of the White Tiger, I've been to the Clinton's, and I've fed the tiger to the Sakyamuni! The pyramids have danced on the pyramids, and Jesus has played drums on his head.
10. I am in the jungle, the jungle but no legend about me!
11. About thongs: before, take off the panties to see the ass; now, pull out the ass to see the panties ......
12. Go the way of others, so that others have no way to go!
13. I am like a fly lying on the glass, the future is bright, but I can not find the way out.
14. The man in the street, east, west, south, north and south can not be distinguished. I can't tell the difference between east and west, north and south. I can't tell the difference between east and west, north and south, north and south.
15. I heard that women are like clothes and brothers are like hands and feet. In retrospect, I even seven hands and feet of the naked run for 19 years!
16. Dormitory brothers decided to implement the following punishment for the roommate: let him hold the pole plastered with old Chinese medicine advertisements, full of tears full of deep emotion shouted: my disease is finally saved ah!
17. Inserted into the hole of others is the plug, there is a hole being inserted by others is the socket!
18. Three over the women's restroom and do not enter!
19.Rats never waste the night, while we humans waste a third of every day
20. "What do you mean by an optimist?" "This ...... is like a teapot, his ass is burning red and he's still in the mood to whistle!"
21.Rather believe that there are ghosts in the world, but also do not believe that the man's broken mouth!
22. Now the most "damaging" people's sentence is: "You really fucking * ah"
23. No one deserves your tears, worthy of your tears will not let you shed tears!
24. A man can be relied on, a sow can get on the tree.
25, when the university down from me, carrying pants, said: you can go, but youth must stay, at this moment it suddenly realized that it is not me on the university but the university on me!
26, its text is immortalized for 500 years, and its people are immortalized for a thousand years, a thousand years later, the end of the world, what is rotten.
27, someone challenged me to say: you let the horse over. I don't answer back, I just sprinted away and then knocked him down after the horse.
28, the so-called grow up, is that you know that is what happened, the so-called maturity, is that you know deliberately say do not know.
29, the work should be done "by the rice urged", rather than "waiting for rice to eat". This is only pass.
30, know to look behind the person, is a wise man and aestheticist, know to look behind the person, is a traitor.
31, timid hypocrites say white as gray; bold hypocrites say black as gray, reversing black and white is not the most successful reversal of black and white, but no more black and white.
32, pestle and mortar can be ground into a needle, but the wooden pestle can only be ground into a toothpick, the material is not right, and then efforts are useless.
33, the terrible thing about stupid people is not in their stupidity, but in up smart.
34, forget to zipper up the zipper after urinating, you are middle-aged; forget to zipper down the zipper after the small ship, you are the elderly.
35, bathing is a blessing for the buttocks, the head suffers; watching movies is a blessing for the head, the buttocks suffer, listening to your speech is the head, buttocks are suffering.
36, online since ancient times, there is no girl, a line of rows of flowers, occasionally a few pairs of mandarin ducks, birds, but also pheasants with the color of the wolf.
37, how to maintain the body? The first thing you need to do is to get your hands on a new one, and you'll be able to do that.
38, the beauty of learning is to make people confused; the beauty of poetry is to incite men and women to derailment; the beauty of women is to be stupid without remorse; the beauty of men is to say that the day to see ghosts.
39, you look at you! Look at the back of the emergency brake thousands of horses; turned his head to scare off millions of soldiers.
40, poke blind eyes and pull out all the hair to splash a face of sulfuric acid to knock out the teeth and cut out the tongue to make a human stick, including MM together with excision.
41, if back to the post is a virtue, then I have long been a saint.
42, would rather let China not have a virgin, but also can not let Japan have a virgin.
43, the man looks handsome with a butt ah? Can you go to the bank and use your face to swipe your card?
44, you sing will never bring the wolf, really - you will only scare the wolf away.
45, if you hate a man, beat his woman into Li Yu Chun, so that he can not enjoy the pleasure of the upper body, if you ruthless a woman, beat her man into Li Yu Chun, so that she can not enjoy the pleasure of the lower body.
46, his knife is cold, the sword is cold, the heart is cold, the blood is cold, shit, this man is not dead?
47, really do not want to do - because the pestle has been ground into a "needle".
48, the east wind blowing, war drums beating, beauty drunk, looking forward to the return of the king, the news fly, the return of the strong.
49, hand to hand broken, foot to foot broken, head to the west bar rotten.
50, chatting is valuable, the price of the network fee is higher, if for the sake of sleep, both can be thrown away.
51. If you don't chat on the Internet, you're going to die.
52, this person is dead, something to burn paper.
53, the sky horse meteor fist - Lushan ascending dragon bully - phoenix wing Tianxiang - diamond stardust - - nebula lock chain -Nebula Chain - please leave a message if you are not dead yet.
54, the master is organizing a special meeting to study in the end to stew white bone spirit or braised.
55, the wind shed tears, pee snorting back of the foot.
56, the old man's skin and flesh loose, do what not in.
57, mother taught children to urinate, a zipper, two pull out, three pull back, four pee, five push forward, six put back in, seven zipper. The little boy grew up! One day her mom was outside and heard him shouting "three, five; three, five" inside.
58, life can not be like cooking, all the ingredients are ready before the pot.
59, fear makes you a prisoner. Hope allows you to regain your freedom.
60, it is the woman's love of the mall, to make the mall more and more exciting. Women are the savior of the mall, the door of every mall should be left with the biggest word: thanks to women.
61, low head to have the courage to raise the head to have low gas.
62, not afraid of being used, for fear that you are useless.
63, good temper is the best dress one can wear in socializing.
64, sometimes we are grateful for the small favors of others, but we are blind to the kindness of our loved ones for a lifetime.
65, only know just the person, will inevitably be broken; only soft people, in the end is a coward.
66, don't look at me not beautiful, I take you as bandits, don't look at me not fat, I take you as a stick.
67, I don't care if you have money, I only care if you have a future.
68, the beauty of the constipation, and often no two, although the words of the loss of a little, after all, is also the voice of the people.
69, and then the perfect body, in the eyes of people who do not love her, but also a solution to flirt with the material.
70, small trees do not repair material, children do not play no weapon.
71, accumulated for a long time, may lead to the outbreak; and outbreak for a long time, may lead to the collapse.
72, to the upper to be respectful, to the lower to be powerful, to the same level to contain but not show.
73, again difficult and bitter, when they are two hundred and fifty-five, again difficult and dangerous, when they are two skin face.
74, you say you are behind a head still wearing a forward cap.
75, the shelling of the head also comb a thunderbolt Feng.
76, I can not speak, once I see a lot of people stuttering, like a sheep shitting, not your flavor please bear with me.
77, the upper know astronomy, the lower know geography, in pediatrics, know yin and yang, know gossip, planning in the tent, decision-making in a thousand miles.
78, before the skeleton after Xuanwu, the left blue dragon right white tiger.
79, the explanation is to cover up, cover up is to make up stories.
80, far away from the green mountains and green water, close to the demented pressure crack mouth.
81, unknowingly time has been rushed, life often live in regret.
82, the wax torch into ash tears began to dry, turned into spring mud I will be more Hu flower.
83, today is not for the dog fighting British fighters, tomorrow even reduced to gossip refugees.
84, light talk without practicing fake showmanship, real material real work.
85, know how to use the wrong to the case to prove their innocence of pornography.
86, men do not get drunk, women how to have tips; women do not get drunk, men how to have the opportunity; women men are not drunk, no one sleeps in the hotel.
87, very macho, "very big" is based on one of my organs tailor-made.
88, the businesswoman does not know the hatred of the dead country, prostitutes do not understand extramarital affairs.
89, in fact, many people say that I am like sorghum Chaowei, I do not want to recognize, because I think that people have to make a feature, I still think I look more like Kimura Takuya.
90, I am in the position of monk, my task is to distribute love to all beings.
91, you took my sea needle, the bottom of the sea is out of balance, so that we can only migrate to the shore.
92, to the top of the mountain only to find that the wrong way and the right way is just a few steps away.
93, do not steam buns to fight for the line?
94, I eat more salt than you eat rice? That is your mouth heavy; I crossed the bridge than you walk more? That's because you're lazy.
95, endure a bear wind and waves, retreat not step sea and sky.
96, I'm fine, thirteen too much golden bells, practice is the butt.
97, life from ancient times who did not die, ah a shit without paper.
98, just so you are comfortable, take off your pants often pull.
99, optimists see opportunities in disasters, pessimists see disasters in opportunities.
100, anger is that other people's mistakes to punish themselves.