Zhaohua recalls: my insignificance in the sisterhood line had its advantages, which was that it was freer. No one loves you, no one cares about you, you are free. My face is black and black, my whole body is chubby, and I don't worry about getting sick. There is no one to play with me, and I am left alone to bore my skin.
She was not a person who was very good at expressing her dissatisfaction. When I was a kid, my second sister snatched her candy, and she didn't dare to snatch it back. She just wanted to cry, and was hit by my second sister, who said, "Don't cry, and then I'm going to hit you again. She had to deflate her mouth and force the tears back.
Yoon and Zhaohua's age is close, and since childhood has been living together, good as a person, without words, but after all, a black and white, a fat and thin, the difference is still there.
Don't look at the second sister Yunhe's body is not good, but the brain is very good, Zhaohe did "bad things", she remembered in her heart, but Zhaohe just do not recognize, like a small child, mouth and mouth defense "is not this thing!
Zhao and can not do the girl's work, threading the needle and thread, the pimple on the head of the thread sewed on the front of the cloth, to Yunhe left decades of laughingstock.
Father hired a female gentleman to teach the three sisters music, dance and arithmetic. The family bought special practice clothes and soft-soled shoes for them, and the sisters wore them and proudly took a photo. After the photo was brought, the three sisters fought to see, Zhaohe top naughty, grabbed over and shouted: "ugly, ugly!" Big sister, the second sister did not stop, she put her own face to pick off.
The eldest sister, Yuan He, has always kept this photo. Later, she gave Yunhe and Zhaohua each remade a picture to send. As soon as she got the photo, the naughty voice of Zhaohua immediately rang in Yunhe's ears: ugly, ugly ......
1928, Shanghai, China Public School.
A man stood on the podium, looking at the following sat full of people, he originally carefully prepared the opening speech but could not say a word, just so dumbly stood for ten minutes, the students just looked at him, like looking at a shy little child, each other so awkward, the students did not rise up, perhaps aware of their own demeanor, he turned his back, put up a pen to write on the blackboard: " First time in class, see you many people, afraid." ? The students laughed, they are not laughing at the teacher timid, but think he is very cute, with laughter tolerate his trepidation.
This teacher is Shen Congwen.
Among the four sisters in the Zhang family, Zhaohua was not considered beautiful; she was dark, good at schoolwork, and even better at sports, being the first in all-around sports for girls in the Chinese public school. She was quiet and introverted, yet Shen thought it was all just right, and he adored this black peony with all his heart.
After falling in love with Zhaohua at first sight, Shen began to write her love letters, one after another, expressing his admiration endlessly.
Zhang Zhaohe is very cold, his letter, she almost one did not return.
As a teacher, he began to pursue this female student. At that time, Zhang Zhaohe had many suitors, and many boys wrote her love letters, which she organized into "Frog 1", "Frog 2", "Frog 3", "Frog 2", "Frog 3", "Frog 3", "Frog 3", "Frog 3", "Frog 3", "Frog 3", and "Frog 3". ...... read it and put it in the drawer, and not back.
Received a letter from the teacher Shen Congwen, she froze, read it or did not return. Second sister Zhang Yunhe saw teased that this can only be ranked about "toad 13".
When Shen told Hu Shi about the incident, the outstanding "love ambassador" said he would like to help Shen solve the problem, and thought that if he came forward, things should not be too difficult. However, President Hu apparently overestimated his own energy.
Hu said to Zhang Zhaohe, "He is stubbornly in love with you."
Zhang Zhaohe's reply was stubborn and proud as she said, "I stubbornly do not love him."
" I have traveled over many bridges in many places, seen clouds many times, and drank many kinds of wine, but I have only loved one person who was at his best age."
Shen Congwen wrote love letters for Zhang Zhaohe for four years, and did not drop a day for four whole years, Shen Congwen's infatuation to Zhang Zhaohe forced no way back.
Another literary youth Ba Jin gave him the idea to buy a book for Miss Zhang - but Miss Three is not at home, the second sister Yunhe came out to look at the sun is so big, told him to come in and sit down, waiting for Miss Three to come back. I guess Shen Congwen was already nervous, as soon as he heard that the three misses are not at home, froze and said, "I'll go", turned his head and ran away.
The second sister said, people came all the way to find you, ran a trip for nothing, you have to go to invite people to play at home.
There is no way, the third lady had to condescend to go to the hotel where Shen Congwen lived.
At that time, Shen Congwen was lying on the bed in a daze, Miss Three knocked on the door, he opened the door and froze in fear.
The third lady looked at him that dull, but in the way of the second sister's orders, had to continue to say: my family has a lot of younger siblings, you come to play.
In this way, Shen Congwen stayed in Suzhou for a week, and ran to Zhang's house every day, and all the brothers and sisters of Zhang's family had a very good impression of him.
After living in Suzhou for a while, Shen Congwen left with fondness and hope, and before he left, he specially instructed Zhaohua: "If dad agrees, let me know earlier, so that I, a countryman, can drink a cup of sweet wine." Yun and help him to propose marriage to his father, after getting permission, hurried to send a telegram to the third sister-in-law, only a "Yun" word, a double entendre, both the meaning of consent and the name of the sender.
Zhaohua was afraid that her second brother Shen could not read it, and secretly sent him another telegram: "Countryman drink a cup of sweet wine!"
Zhaohe finally chose to accept Shen Congwen, certainly because "his letters are too well written", but also can not be separated from the family's push and pull.
The principal also said that Shen Congwen is good, the second sister also said that Shen Congwen is good, everyone said Shen Congwen is good. The third young lady could not carry it. She began to wonder if she was too cold, if she really should be with this talented literary young man.
"Whether his passion is genuine or decorated with words, I always seem to have the sadness that I myself have done something wrong and thus trapped others in misfortune." These were Ms. Chang's exact words.
September 9, 1933, this is the happiest day of Shen Congwen's life. The bitter love that lasted four years finally led to marriage. At the beginning of their marriage, Shen Congwen and Zhang Zhaohe sipped the sweet wine of love together and had a happy time.
Shen Congwen called Zhang Zhaohe San San, Shen Congwen called Zhang Zhaohe " San San ", and Zhang Zhaohe called him " second brother ". He also wrote a novel called San San. The main characters in his works are slightly dark-skinned, beautiful and handsome, straightforward and innocent women, like Zhang Zhaohe.
In the second year of marriage, there is a big son Shen Long Zhu, the fourth year of marriage, there is a second son Shen Hu Xiao. This family, Shen speaks Xiangxi, Miss Three speaks Hefei, Xiaolong speaks Beijing, and Xiaohu speaks Kunming, which is really interesting.
The fairy tale always ends with: the prince and the princess live happily ever after. However, marriage is the dojo of one's practice.
The fate of Zhaohua was the most difficult among the four sisters. Within a few years after Mr. Shen Congwen and Zhang Zhaohe got married, an ambiguous relationship with the poetess Gao Qingzi ended up being a permanent pain in Zhaohe's heart.
In 1935 or so, Shen had something to visit the former prime minister of the Republic of Xiong Xiling, but he was not there that day, was as the Xiong family tutor Gao Qingzi received, I did not expect that the two people have the same interest in chatting very happy, and later on they had the chance to see each other again, that time, Gao Qingzi is a good dress up, according to the style of the female protagonist in his novel.
This makes Shen Congwen can not help but rejoice, the two are really getting closer and closer, once to the edge of the forbidden zone. Later, Shen Congwen could not bear this ethical torment will be to Zhang Zhaohe confessed, naturally Zhang Zhaohe angry back to her mother's home.
Shen Congwen no solution, at this time he thought of a person, think she can help himself to solve this problem, then rushed to the Liang family, to Lin Huiyin told the cause of the whole thing, for Shen Congwen this spiritual derailment, Lin Huiyin evaluation is pertinent: " his poet temperament created his counter, so that he is confused about the life and the conflict between the overwhelmed. "
After the July 7 Incident, Shen first went to the south to seek an errand, from Beijing to Kunming, walked for eight months, during which he kept writing to the three misses to hurry to bring the children together from Beijing to Kunming to meet, in fact, think carefully, so that the three misses with the young two sons (unusually active four-year-old and a year-old waiting to be fed) plus a sister-in-law together with the follow the blind hiking, this day unimaginable.
Shen Congwen is romantic and literary, but Zhang Zhaohe is rational and pragmatic.
After the liberation, Shen Congwen, who was called a pink literati by Guo Moruo, was under great psychological pressure and once committed suicide. Mr. and Mrs. Liang Sicheng and Lin Huiyin invited Shen to come to their home in Tsinghua to recuperate.
Soon after, Zhaohua received a letter from her husband and replied - I read the letter and my heart is weak. Rarely on earth there is such a friendship ...... but people are good to us, nothing to take compensation for our good, touched my heart so sad! I heard that Huiyin himself is also guilty of asthma, I hope you can pull yourself together, don't put your own worries to increase the worries of your friends, your body and nerves can be restored to health in their home, rejoice when more than one of her.
Zhaohe is very concerned about Shen Congwen's writing, concerned about whether he is fully committed, will not stop the pen in hand. "You're not fit to write criticism," she tells him. She felt that witty "short essays" would destroy a writer's natural talent. She considers them "trivial and cosmetic" and does not want her husband to devote his energies to writing such things.
She said to Congwen: "You have your own face, clean, pure, cover any kind of mask will not be appropriate. You were a good man, but unfortunately you have been Spoiled by all sorts of unsuitable tricks."
In the most confusing and difficult time for her husband, it was Mega and supported the family.
1969-1972, Zhaohua decentralized to Hubei Xianning five seven dry school picking dung planting labor, and then transferred to Hubei Danjiang dry school. The second sister Yunhe heard that Zhaohua picking dung and planting fields, but also a pair of red with Bingxin.
Ling Hong (eldest sister Yuanhe's daughter) exclaimed: third aunt's spirit of hard work and endurance is really admirable, in any case can not see that she is the last of the boudoir of a pampered and weak woman. In old age, actually can withstand such heavy physical labor in the dry school, so that her toes are deformed, out of shape. Later, when she returned to the capital, she worked honorably as a shoemaker. Auntie San boasted with gusto that her skills were quite good!
Because of personality incompatibility, Shen Congwen and Zhang Zhaohe were rarely together. Both were in Beijing, but lived in two places. Shen Congwen ate every day and left, children full of room, surprisingly, not a few words.
They loved each other, but they tortured each other like this.
In spite of this, Zhang Zhaohe is the most beautiful scenery in Shen Congwen's eyes at any time.
In 1969, "Shen stood in a messy room, he pulled out a crumpled letter from his bulging pocket, and said to me, as if he were crying and laughing: 'This is the first letter she (Zhang Zhaohua, who had been decentralized to Xianning in Hubei at this time) ever wrote to me.' He held the letter up with a very shy and gentle ...... face then burst into tears, the almost seventy year old man cried like a small child sad and happy."
May 10, 1988, full of vicissitudes of Shen Congwen peacefully passed away, returned to his soulful Xiangxi. Leaving infinite attachment to the gray-haired San San: "Sister San, I'm sorry for you." --These are his last words.
This outstanding novelist and researcher of historical relics has published more than thirty short story collections and six medium-length novels in his lifetime***, and is one of the few modern Chinese writers with a worldwide reputation.
Fourth sister Zhang Chonghe, who was very close to this second brother during his lifetime, also wrote an elegy for him:
Not to be compromised and not to be subordinated, but also to be compassionate and to let go;
The stars of his writings, the deficit of his person.
The second sister, Yunhe, went to see Zhaohua: "The children said that the third sister was resting. I gently pushed open the door of the bedroom of Shen Erge and the third sister, the third sister stood in front of the bed, and did not sleep. I gently stroked the third sister's hand, we sat down at the desk, the third sister was very calm and peaceful. I was silent, not knowing what to say. It was my third sister who opened her mouth first, like recounting something that had happened to someone else. She said that her second brother was feeling gassy and angina, and that Sis had comforted him by making some hurried phone calls. The third sister added, "In the past, during his five-year illness, I was by his side at all times. He called out when he didn't see me for a moment and I always flew back to him."
Yunhe said, "You were also too tired these five years. Apart from taking care of Shen Erge, you can't do anything."
The third sister was as calm and serene as ever. This tranquility contains a sorrowful heart. Decades of life proved that Mr. Shen is such a good person, the third sister and he with the sweet **** bitter, through the heavy pressure and tribulation, for this reason the third sister's character have many changes, few people can believe that she was originally so naughty and active.
The oldest son Long Zhu recalled, I have a sweater undershirt is made of dark red and light brown four pieces of collage, very good-looking, but it is the mother with the old sweater sweater pants of the broken line a section of the rubbing twisting and playing into the mother to go to Wulongbu difficult children's school, occasionally from the halfway ShuiTianKan side of the countryside store with a few buckwheat cake, became our unforgettable delicacy.
Now people say that mom is a famous girl, but I seem to have never seen her delicate hands, I remember the most impression is the winter plastered with rubber cream fingers, knuckles much thicker than the fingers.
Who says Zhang Zhaohe does not understand Shen Congwen? She raised her family's efforts to organize Mr. Shen's posthumous manuscripts, selected letters and complete works. She "revived" a small garden on the balcony of her residence in Yibin Hutong, a small sheep - the names of the flowers are the names of the girls in Shen Congwen's books.
In the afterword of "From Wen's Letters", Zhaohua said: "The experience is absurd and bizarre, but also extremely common, is our generation of intellectuals more or less must go through life. There are smiles, there is pain; there is peace and quiet, there is indignation; there is joy, there is also tearing the heart and lungs of unspeakable suffering.
She said: "From Wen with me, this life, is it happiness or misfortune? I can't get an answer. I didn't understand him, I didn't fully understand him. Later, I gradually gained some understanding, but I really understood his character and the pressure he had to bear in his life when I was organizing and compiling his posthumous manuscripts. What I did not know in the past, I know now; what I did not understand in the past, I understand now. He was not a perfect man, but a rare and kind man. Inorganic heart to people, love of the motherland, love of the people, help people, for and not have, simple and simple, full of affection for all sinks and all things."
February 16, 2003, Zhang Zhaohua also died swiftly, there has been a sensational love for each other, there has been the blandness of the dishes, there have been complaints and entanglements, there have been mutual perseverance, everything will return to dust. Long time ago, Shen Congwen waited for her in the distance.