The older you get, the more you see. Unlike when I was a child, I was always ups and downs in sadness and could not escape. Swallow bitter water and spit out bitter water. I can't sleep watching the bed board in the upper bunk night after night. I put my finger into my scalp, looked for the protruding hair follicle, dug it out and found the next one.
Inch by inch, the night will be short
I almost called Siqi, too. I remember that when the primary school changed the hukou book, there happened to be Zhang Henshui's adaptation of "Crying Marriage". There is a woman named Yus in it, and my mother likes her very much. Although she seldom played and had a bad ending, she insisted on changing my name to Yusi or Si Qi at that time, but unfortunately the household registration police did not allow it.
"Siqi knows that an enamel doll girl showing off her cleverness will only make her appearance appear bared. Yi Ting knows that an ugly little girl is smart and others just think she is crazy. Very close. We have each other. Otherwise, they will all be suffocated by their own experience of the world. "
In fact, children's awareness of beauty and ugliness is very early, earlier than their parents.
I knew my eyes were beautiful when I was very young, and countless uncles and aunts who came home for dinner praised the child for having Zhao Wei's eyes. Then let you perform a program, sing a swallow, and then sing a rain butterfly when you are old.
"Love is so beautiful that my heart is intoxicated with the feeling of being loved."
Do you think children don't understand love? Actually, they do. Just a little different from adults.
In the word "love", adults see desire and sex, while children see light in their eyes and cocoons on their fingers.
This is a beautiful feeling. She didn't know what it was, only that it was pleasant, with gains and losses.
When you have no ability to act or judge, there is no good or bad in this world, and there is no right or wrong. Everything and people are dim starlight in the sky. Starlight covers you and me, and you and I wander around the stars.
We rise and fall, we go back and forth. We wrote many stories and talked a lot.
But one day, when you have the knowledge that the world needs you, when you understand the three views and standards shared by the world, you will be in a trance. Everything that happened should not exist. Beyond your cognitive judgment. You know you are wrong, but you don't know how wrong it is, how wrong it can be, and how wrong it should be. I don't know how to deal with it, how to solve it, and how to save it.
So I ran away.
"They are Russian dolls, one large and one small. They all know that if they keep cutting and digging and take out the smallest Russian doll, they will see that the doll is only as big as the little finger, because it is too small, the brush is too thick, and the face is sketched and looks like crying. "
Who is not a loser?
Who has never had dark thoughts and dark thoughts in his heart?
Who hasn't thought of such things as "if only I were" and "if only he wasn't"?
Is there really someone as pure as a blank sheet of paper in this world?
"I got up the courage to ask him,' What do you like best about me when I do this?' He only answered four words:' Breathe a little.' Si Qi was surprised. I know it's a sentence describing Daiyu's debut in A Dream of Red Mansions. She almost cried and asked him,' Is Dream of Red Mansions for teachers? He did not hesitate:' Dream of Red Mansions, Songs of Chu, Historical Records and Zhuangzi, these words are all for me.' For an instant, she knew all about the greed, noise, life and death, filth, dreams and curses of this relationship. "
In my mind, sexual assault and murder are the same, and they are all sins of human nature after breaking free from shackles.
In fact, it is not appropriate to describe crime. In the final analysis, this crime is the evaluation given to it by our world. Is it a crime to put it in another parallel world, another earth and another universe? Will it be mainstream behavior, and will it be allowed by law like monogamy now?
In fact, what I want to know more is what he thinks, what he thinks. It's not the reasons and excuses he casually said, but what his deep thoughts are.
I have a meow and a woof.
When I'm free on weekends, I look them in the eye. I want to look into their hearts and see how they view our relationship.
Do you think I am their master? Or am I just a kind roommate who provides food? Why did they come to me for touching? Why did they arrest me? I really want to know, but I can't figure it out.
I really want to know what others think. Scratching your scalp and pulling out your nails can't even guess.
Did he really say it, or did I guess it, or did these simple words hide a deep dark bottomless whirlpool under his smile?
We can't guess others and we can't see through ourselves.
"It seems that we didn't have the habit of saying sorry to each other at an early age, or didn't have a chance to say sorry. It's hard to say, so I have to apologize to everyone here. But I'm not sure why I apologize. In fact, I hear you cry at night more than anyone else, but I don't understand the meaning of that kind of crying. Sometimes when I face you, I feel small. I feel like a tourist hiking along the crater of Hugh volcano, and you are the crater. I looked at the deep crater and had a desire to jump and erupt. "
They are very much like twins. They grew up together for thirteen years, with the same hands, feet and eyes. Suddenly, they gained their freedom and lost their way. They don't know where the sun is.
Starting from the same starting point, we go further and further in the opposite direction.
The beautiful angel fell from the clouds, but the ugly duckling turned into a swan flying to the sky.
"In realism, when you fall in love with a person, because he is cute, and a person dies, because he deserves to die, the author who hates this role will set a fire in the attic and let her fall to death ── but the reality is not like this, and life is not like this. I have always learned from books that the world is painful and painful. When second-hand bad emotions attack me in real life, I have no time to dig out a paper to fight back. I'm always stuck in the middle of the book, not sure whether to take it back or just break free. Maybe I will grow up to be an adult 18 years old that I will hate. But you still have time. "
The more books you read, the more you build yourself a wall. The wall is getting thicker and higher. Wandering on the tower, thinking that I could find the ladder by reading another book, but book by book, sentence by sentence, page by page, I fell into the tower of Babylon.
I can only keep going up, getting farther and farther away from the world and getting closer and closer to God.
"In fact, when I first thought of death, I was already dead. Life is like clothes, so it is easy to be deprived. "
When you decide to give up on yourself, you are already dead, leaving only a shell. It has your face, your eyes and your memory, but not your heart.
It follows your life path for you, and you are not responsible for the result. This is someone else's life.
Let's live in our own world and make up a beautiful paradise for first love. In it, love is not love, not hate, nor hate, only the dim starlight looking up and the pink toes looking down.
Experience:
Reading this book in the warm sunshine at noon, the weather is fine today, the sky is high and the clouds are light, and the warm wind blows gently. I really hope that God can give some light and warmth to those who need it.
This is a very sad story, and you will see a lot and think a lot from it. Pain and happiness go hand in hand in life, just like plant growth, there will be dry summer and cold winter.
The older you get, the more you believe in life. I believe that all the pain is destined to meet. It comes from your personality, your growing experience, every day you waste, every decision you make.
No one has any bitterness in his heart, but life always goes on.
Fang Siqi repeatedly questioned herself in the book, why Miss Li, who had read many poetry books, would do such a thing to her.
I think this passage is the best answer:
I got up the courage to ask him, "What do you like best about me when I do this?" He only answered four words:' Breathe a little.' Si Qi was surprised. I know it's a sentence describing Daiyu's debut in A Dream of Red Mansions. She almost cried and asked him,' Is Dream of Red Mansions for teachers? He did not hesitate:' Dream of Red Mansions, Songs of Chu, Historical Records and Zhuangzi, these words are all for me.' For an instant, she knew all about the greed, noise, life and death, filth, dreams and curses of this relationship. "
In Fang Siqi's world, literature is a wall that separates people. But what is literature? The earliest Book of Songs was used to record the love between men and women, please the nobles, gossip about the sufferings of the people and record the war casualties.
Just because a person has a certain literary accomplishment does not mean that he has no other thoughts; A person without literary accomplishment is not necessarily a person with a pure heart.
In Empresses in the Palace, Shen Meizhuang said that the emperor in this palace is not like an emperor, and concubines are not like concubines. What are emperors and concubines like? What she wants to achieve is that the emperor is diligent in governing the country and the concubines are friendly and respectful, which is never possible, because they are people, not paintings.
The world we live in is the most real world. Everyone has kindness and hidden malice. We are experiencing personality changes all the time, and we suppress ourselves to survive.
A gentleman doesn't smell things outside the window, always remain uncorrupted and gentle, and there is no harm between people, reaching 100% trust. I'm afraid she/Kloc-lived in a fantasy world until she was 0/3 years old.
In real life, behind the sunshine is darkness.