You don't have to deliberately discover my existence. As long as you bow your head a little, you can find me in the silhouette of dusk and night. I will always be by your side, with memories of you, becoming a part of your life.
You finally found me.
It was a quiet night, and occasionally a few frogs came from the opposite pond. The sky was originally dark as ink, but the bright moon, which did not know when to rise, dyed a touch of gold for the deep night and lit up the way for you and your father to go home.
You take a step to stay ahead of your father, but it seems a bit difficult. You stopped chasing, I think you are tired. But I saw you shaking your little head and turning to my side. There is confusion in his eyes.
"Who are you?" Finally, you bit your finger and asked me.
I chuckled. You little girl, I knew you would ask. However, I'm a little surprised that you turned around. After all, I haven't even drawn up the content of my introduction.
Just when you pouted and didn't know how to judge my image. Father smiled and put his arm around your shoulder and said, "Don't study, you will know sooner or later." And take you home.
I am still behind you, counting your scattered steps, full of my memories. I'm glad you finally found me. In this slightly chilly spring night, you gradually get used to my existence.
Without youth and injury, you gradually grow up and mature during that growing period. With your own opinions and those unformed ideas, you always feel that it is right. Stubbornness is your personality, but under that strong cover, it is a heart that needs protection.
Tonight, you sit at your desk and sigh for the third time at the steaming coffee in front of you. What happened? There is a shallow ditch between your brow, and you are not as radiant as before. Today you are like a sunless sunflower, lifeless.
If you fail the exam, don't lose heart. Find the mistake, I believe I can do it better next time.
If you are criticized, don't be depressed. This may be a well-meaning accusation, designed to motivate you and help you find the right channel. Accept criticism and improve yourself. This is the best choice.
If there are contradictions in friendship, don't be sad. Only a short loss, you will understand what is precious; Only when you are in trouble will you understand the importance and greatness of friendship. Believe in your friendship and tolerate those mistakes with a tolerant heart.
I imagined countless "ifs" behind you, but I never stood up and asked. I know you will hear everything I say to you. Now it's time to give you a quiet environment and let yourself solve those troubles that bother you.
You have to understand that you can't get hurt without youth. After every pain, failure and tears, you can always harvest precious things. Face everything with an upward heart forever! Don't let your colorful youth leave regrets.
Every time you make a phone call or video chat, you always look satisfied and comfortable. But I know you're not doing well.
But I dare not tell you clearly. I believe what you say like a fool, pretend to envy you and listen to you. Sometimes I feel guilty. I know you are having a hard time, but there is nothing I can do about it. Sometimes I really want to tell you clearly, but I am afraid that you will cry because of my understanding and comfort, and there is nothing I can do.
I know it's not easy for you to rush outside alone. You should see clearly those intrigues and solve those stubborn struggles. Although the surface is radiant every day, the heart is lonely. You are not like me. Although I am alone outside, at least in a relatively simple space, I am relatively free and not so tired.
Sometimes it hurts to think of you. I want to scold you, I want to hit you, I want you to give up your choice and work hard in another way, but I can't make a decision for you. I know you are a stubborn person, even if you hit the wall, you won't look back. It is your stubbornness that makes me feel that you have persisted for a long time and are about to break the string, but you are still fighting hard. Only I understand that you want to get ahead, you want to be gorgeous. Your temper can't tolerate servile gestures, and your ambition can't tolerate the humiliation of relying on others.
However, have you ever thought that health is the capital of revolution? If you don't cherish yourself so much, ten or twenty years later, you will regret being so ignorant of yourself. This ignorance has done great damage to your scarred mind in the most cruel way. Can you stand it?
I don't know how to tell you, whether it's a friend or a relative. I'm afraid that the comfort I give you will make you suddenly collapse the bank and have no strength to go on. I am also afraid that you will be more rebellious because of my preaching-you are not me, how can you understand my difficulties? Yes, our life trajectory has deviated, we have chosen different paths and are destined to accept different tests.
I can imagine your road, but I really can't understand the struggle. So, all I know is that your life is not so good. A lot of grievances and embarrassment must be borne by yourself. Sometimes I want to pour it out, but I find there is no place to pour it. You are afraid to tell your parents, who will persuade you to give up and beg you to go back. You are afraid to tell your friends, and they will laugh at you, idiot, and pity you desperately. So you can only carry the burden alone!
I know you're having a hard time. If you really can't come, please come back! Here will always be your harbor to settle down, and the door here will always be open for you. You don't have to worry about anything Only when you come back can we solve any difficulties together!
Your senior three composition 3 Haruki Murakami once said, "Memories will warm you from your heart and cut you violently from your heart."
When a clown changes from a circus to a decent job, he is "fine", or because his income is higher and his job is safer, he doesn't have to work as hard as somersaults every day. But the clown misses himself who doesn't sell hamburgers, because it was once the place where he worked hard for most of his life, and it was his favorite occupation.
In fact, everyone can experience this life, become a "clown" and then become a "hamburger seller". "Clown" is the most primitive and true passion in our hearts, and "hamburger seller" is our ultimate choice. Whether active or forced, it always seems to be more suitable for the world outside of ourselves than "clowns".
Aunt Susan, who became a hit in Britain's Got Talent a few years ago, became famous overnight and appeared more in various variety shows. She admits that she misses herself who used to sing "Carefree" more than her overnight fame. It can be seen that everyone tends to be the one who pursues nature in his soul, but he always tends to fall to another self in the world-a person who finally gives up being a clown for various reasons. This is not a bad thing, but it shows sadness. I think the reason is that people have different choices about what they really want and their own survival and improvement.
We live in an era of nutrition, and it is no longer the mainstream to talk about feelings and enthusiasm. Everyone wants to be "nothing" and leave their initial heart behind; What's more, unlike the clown who changed his profession, he directly became a "hamburger seller". It's not that people should be desperate to keep the ideal and initial intention of "clown", but that we really should reflect on the utilitarian mentality of abandoning the initial intention. This warns us that we are often in a state of scarcity, lacking the initial pursuit, and the worst result is even the lack of our own meaning. Just like Duncan who left the dance, how can everything be "all right" in the end?
In contrast, the clown in the story. He left most of his life to his beloved circus career. When he was old, he retired and lived a comfortable life selling hamburgers. When he thinks of himself occasionally, he will smile. In fact, there is no contradiction between the initial heart and reality, but the greed of people in reality makes people finally lose the capital of "thinking". There will be two of you in the world, pursuing your initial heart in the best time; When I return to another self in the years when the time has come, when I think of another self in the world, I will care but I will not regret it, and I will keep a smile in my heart as time goes by.
As Woolf said, "man should not be a flower inserted in a still life, but a rhythm flying on the grassland." The meaning of life may not have an answer, but enjoy this life without an answer. "What matters is not that everything is good for the clown, but his smile when he writes" I just miss you ".
You gently twist up a season of carefree sadness and hide it in the picture of orchids, and the magnificent sky will open for me. Can you describe this charming light makeup I made for you?
I like to say something in my spare time, and I have enough reasons to decompose my irritability in my explicit or implicit thoughts. Where I put pen to paper, it seems that there is no ink on my chest and no great wisdom. Therefore, looking at the four fields, the secular vision cannot present magnificent beauty in the square-inch Guangmo.
In my eyes, everything in the world can be transformed into pure beauty. Even if the color fades one day, my heart will shine and write a quiet journey. The flashy years may be a repetitive process. At this time, flowers bloom, and at this time, flowers fall, or there is a faint fragrance, or there is residual red, which is blown away by the wind and smoke of the world, leaving no trace of warmth. Therefore, the eternity that people will never forget will always be an oasis in the desert. The visual distance never seems far away, but it is always at the end of the day, out of reach and out of an extreme.
Only like eternity. The person in my heart, like a bright moon in the blue sky, always hangs in front of the window on a warm night. No matter how beautiful the scenery will be along the way, my mind will be filled with the figure of a long time ago, and there will be no more waves. Because of this emotional attachment, full of happiness, in the quiet of winter night, I just want to be warm and don't want to be contaminated with floating dust.
I have never measured the distance carefully. Perhaps, the fate between you and me, even if we abandon everything, is only a moment when our fingers touch each other, and we will never get there. Gains and losses are just romantic stories, touching the heart, feelings and years.
If possible, please allow me to draw a blank in my mind and collect this Zen time. Look at the fireworks that live in seclusion outside Chai Men. They are the bright and shining light that I have given you in my life. Even if you walk against the light, it is not too slow.
Last night, I silently spilled crystal all over the floor, reflecting the snowflakes in early winter. In that gorgeous room, I want to close the blank of this season for you and send this plain face of the north to the hotbed of your love. At that moment, you didn't notice that my eyes were wet by a ray of light. In the depths of my gloomy eyebrows, I merged my figure and other thoughts into my palm, put them away, and found a corner outside the world of mortals. Even if it melts, it will become a trickle in your heart, flowing with the promise of this life, loving you all the way to eternity.
Your senior three composition 5 "Meeting and parting, sometimes, nothing lasts forever …" Faye Wong's voice softened the hot summer breeze. The traffic outside the closed window still sounded a shrill horn. People outside the window are mediocre, but I am lazy inside the window.
Just as I was lying on my desk, a cool breeze hit me and my headphones fell to the ground.
"When do you want to play? The senior high school entrance examination is coming soon! "
Without looking up, I smiled and responded to my mother: "Hey hey, it's still early. The days are still long, I am still young! " Then he turned to his mother and blinked.
"Your brother is going out. Go and see him off. He seems to have something to say to you. "
My brother? I suddenly remembered the date in my mind and my brother was going to study abroad! Without saying anything, he ran to the door in lightning speed.
I can clearly see his smiling face and tears. The last time I saw this scene was three years ago.
My brother has achieved excellent results since he was a child, and all the teachers who have taught him think that he can also achieve something in science. Parents listened to the teacher's words, planning to create the future for him every day, and even thinking about giving him a promotion in the competition. They have high expectations for my brother, far greater than me.
But I don't know what happened to me. I obviously have an elusive scientific brain, but I am desperate to learn music.
In his junior year, he faced the senior high school entrance examination. Shortly after the new semester started, he said to me, "Sister, I want to run away from home and go out for a few days. How about it? "
I was only in the sixth grade, and I felt endless excitement. I think there should be no big problem, so I agreed to cover for him.
Autumn afternoon, the sky is exceptionally blue, blue to clear. My brother pointed to the sky and told me that it was his bright future.
But in a few days, he was successfully "caught". My father locked my brother in the study and scolded him. I could hear him clearly outside the door.
I only heard my brother crying and shouting, "I'm just chasing a dream." I just want to learn music. What's wrong with me ... "
My father spoke a few local words excitedly, as if this would wake up my "disappointing" brother.
Father said: smelly boy, time waits for no one, you can't try.
My brother said: The days are still long, and I am still young.
Now, what impressed me the most was my brother's tearful eyes when he came out of the study.
I don't know who won the last question they discussed about "eternal youth" My brother finally chose to be admitted to a good high school. Now he graduated from high school, but he gave up the good future his parents said and went to the North Conservatory of Music.
I don't understand why my father stopped my brother this time. Maybe it doesn't need to be understood.
My brother is leaving. He stood at the door for a long time. He didn't make a long speech. He just whispered in my ear: remember to start doing what you like as soon as possible. Don't be afraid, youth never dies.
Looking at the back of his departure, there is a glimmer of hope. I took out my mobile phone in a hurry and coded the sentence I forgot to say.
May you walk half your life and come back as a teenager.
We are immortal.
You have never been so dead set on it, and you have never been so willing to pursue it. But you made me determined and willing.
Not every flower can represent love, but roses can; Not every tree can withstand thirst, but poplar can; Not everything can make me abandon everything, but you did it.
When I am happy, the first thing I think of is you; When I am sad, the first thing I think of is you; When I am happy, the first thing I think of is you; When I am embarrassed, the first thing I think of is you; When you are proud, the first thing that comes to mind is you; When you are helpless, the first thing that comes to mind is you. ...
I have a thousand words to say to you, but I can only turn them into "I like you".
I don't know when I began to like you. All I know is that I say "I like you" because I can't hold back my feelings for you anymore.
My friend knew that I liked you and advised me, "You can't be infatuated with him, and your grades will drop."
I retorted, "I just like it, not infatuation!" " "I secretly thought: even if the performance declines, what are the disadvantages? From the moment I liked you, I was ready to fall. What's more, corrupting me is harder than killing dragons.
I like you more and more.
The friend said, "You can't extricate yourself. From the moment you like him, your road is destined to become confused and bumpy. "
I smiled and said, "Are you jealous? Have I ever been lost? Have I walked a bumpy road? Even if I was frustrated, it was before I liked him! "
The friend said, "Why are you so different? At this age, most other girls are looking for sadness and hatred for their sweetheart. Why do you love to write articles, silly girl? "
I pouted and said, "I told you, I like it, not infatuation!" " Why don't you always understand? In addition, those who sigh and cry for the so-called' sweetheart' are all silly girls. If you really can't accept my idea, you can think that writing articles is my sweetheart. You have nothing to say now! "
The friend smiled: "You were poisoned by your sweetheart, and I can't understand what you said."
"All in all, I'm chasing a super handsome guy, understand?"
A person, a pen, a sheet piling-I'm dating my sweetheart. He is my prince charming. He is broad-minded and can tolerate all my temper.
I like you so much. You are my prince charming, and I only died for you.
Hey, I'm complaining again. Seeing that the hour hand has passed the zero point again, I can't remember how many times I have stayed up late since the beginning of school. I haven't finished more than half of the set of questions in my hand, but I can't help feeling sleepy. I can only go to the bathroom to shave my face with cold water, and then sit at my desk to continue the long "road of brushing questions".
Yes, I'm going to take the college entrance examination soon.
Many people have asked me the same question-do you like the college entrance examination? I always shake my head. Indeed, the college entrance examination killed my happiness, decided my future and made me nervous every day. How could I like it? But dear, I don't like the college entrance examination, but I have to thank it.
I grew up in a remote town, and the tall city is beyond my power. I can only see a little bit of the outside world from the screen of my mobile phone every day. I sit in front of my peers living in a big city, and I can't find any advantages in me. So, I'm at a loss, I'm confused, I envy. The college entrance examination gave me a way out. As long as I pay what I should, I can reach the end of this road.
In fact, my parents told me from an early age that if I didn't study hard, I would have to stay in this small town. I have known the college entrance examination since I was a child. Only the college entrance examination can turn everything beyond my power into something within my power. So, even if I don't like the college entrance examination, I still want to thank it. It was the college entrance examination that gave me the opportunity to change my life trajectory. I must also cherish this hard-won opportunity.
I know I'm trying. I gritted my teeth every day, wrote one obscure and boring exercise after another with coffee, and watched the deep night turn pale and bright, welcoming a brand-new day. Even though I tried my best, I still got the ideal score, as if all my efforts were in vain, so I felt very sad. After countless failures, I still insist. However, it was the college entrance examination that gave me pressure, taught me patience, taught me persistence, and taught me the courage to face the cruel results after a difficult process, never bow down and never admit defeat. The college entrance examination made me understand that my life will encounter more than ten times of blows and setbacks, and all I can do is not compromise. So honey, I have to thank the college entrance examination.
I often complain about my parents and think they are incompetent. I think the college entrance examination is really unfair. Why is it so easy for students in Beijing and Shanghai to go to college, but it is so difficult for children in remote mountainous areas to go to college? But dear, but most people still regard the college entrance examination as a wooden bridge like me, or stay up late and study hard like me. Therefore, it is the college entrance examination that gives us a chance to compete fairly, so that I can choose a better future even if I have no family background. Honey, I have to thank the college entrance examination.
Your composition in senior three was slightly bright for 8 days, and you sat in a quiet and peaceful yard, choosing dishes. The sun is dancing at the fingertips, and the hands are running around the yard with the smell of earth. When I am tired, I hold my hunchback and look at the crystal dew on the melon vine. My face is filled with happiness.
"Come on, girl, knock on my back." I obeyed, but I still remember my parents' words: "Grandma, when will you move in with us?" You smile and put away the wrinkles on your face: "Don't go, don't go, how old!" Before he finished, he sighed lightly: "You can't go, and there will be no one here. Grandma has to stay here all the time, and her heart is safe. "
Your days always seem so monotonous. Dragging a curved figure slowly back and forth to the small vegetable garden and the old tile house every day. You said that you like to touch fresh and rich melons and fruits every morning, listen to the purr when the water in the earthen stove boils when choosing vegetables, watch the fertile land that you care for carefully, watch the picture of your child writing on the table in the hall, and check the scene that the child doesn't know the homework and pretends to understand it, so that the whole room laughs. You said you wanted to stand there all the time, because you like what you have stuck to all your life and what you once loved.
However, in this small world that is almost isolated from the world, sometimes there is no room for your long shadow moving slowly.
Every evening, you still can't help visiting your old friend. He is faithful in your eyes.
You are standing on the ridge again. The setting sun shines from behind you, reflecting the curved and lonely black silhouette on the ridge. From a distance, your white hair is blown by the wind, like a white cloud. I walked up to you gently and said, "Grandma." You looked up at me, then lowered your head: "After your grandfather left, this land was given to others. But I've always wanted to see it It supports our family. How can there be no feelings? " "Grandma wants to keep it all the time?" You are silent for a long time: "I want to stand here all the time." The distant sunset is warm and shining, just like the red sun that your mother used to say when she was a child in Ran Ran. For many years, you have consistently stood on the ridge with this red sun.
In the early morning, a hazy white light crossed the line of sight. A beautiful village girl came from a distance along the ridge, with a slight smile on her face, brushing the dew on the roadside beans and vines. As the footsteps approached, the beautiful village girl became a middle-aged woman with curly hair, and now she has become a white-haired old man. This is you, your life. You are always there, ordinary and great, until the end.
The college entrance examination is a milestone for us to realize our dreams and a fork in the road of our lives. The college entrance examination again and again, I don't know how many people have caught their throats, but at the same time I don't know how many people have opened the door to life. Time and time again, I don't know how many people are crying and how many people are smiling. Of course, a college entrance examination is more than that. A college entrance examination, which contains too much. Too many tears, too much sweat, too many expectations, too many dreams …
For a high school student like me who has never personally experienced the battlefield of college entrance examination, my college entrance examination is like my favorite thing, and the person I like needs to be guarded by the most beautiful starlight.
Forty years after the resumption of the college entrance examination, many talents have been achieved. They have made great or small contributions to themselves, their families, society and the country all over the country. After listening to the story of their participation in the college entrance examination, we high school students who are about to take the college entrance examination are all moved.
At 8: 30 am on June 7th, 20xx, I walked into the solemn college entrance examination room for the first time. When I sit in my seat with a nervous heart, I don't want to mention how flustered I am. I keep sweating. I looked at the serious faces of my companions, scared and anxious. But I think people often say that "there will be a reward." I usually get up early and get greedy for the black. 12 years of hard work day and night is for the test of these two days! Since it is usually handed in, there is nothing to be afraid of! So I cheered myself up, thinking like this, my heart gradually calmed down and my mind became clearer. Listening to the announcer announce the rules of the examination room in standard Mandarin on the radio, I sat quietly, waiting for the coming struggle that will determine my future and destiny.
My college entrance examination is also my parents' college entrance examination, and they spent unforgettable days with me. In every dark night, I turn page by page under the light, write a word by word, do a topic by topic, and study by myself all night. There is only one purpose, that is, to be admitted to a favorite university. As my father said, work hard, and only by being admitted to an ideal university can you find a stable and good job. For my college entrance examination, my parents are not afraid of the wind and rain, suffering first and enjoying last, leaving me the best food and drink, winning glory for my parents and paving the way for my life. I've worked so hard since I was a child.
The college entrance examination is a test of our efforts from primary school to high school 12 years. The college entrance examination is a rally. Although I had a rest or even gave up halfway, I won't be confused when I saw my classmates pass the college entrance examination and step into the hall of life. I will see my parents' hard work and their expectations of us. With the efforts of my classmates, I will not be confused. College entrance examination, which has such a relationship with me, has bound my destiny and desire to a great extent. So I want to protect my college entrance examination with the most beautiful starlight and cherish my college entrance examination.
10 04 Christmas, when you were born, looking at your sleeping face, I suddenly forgot the sadness of thinking about my mother and complaining about my father's cooking. I called your sister in a trembling voice, and then I couldn't help jumping into my aunt's arms, crying and laughing. After a while, I turned my head and looked at you with a runny nose. That day I became your brother, and that day is unforgettable; You were zero years old that year and I was seven years old that year.
I clearly remember that you began to look around curiously from infancy, and your outstretched little hand kept trying to catch everything around you. My fingers and ears have become your novel toys. At that time, I squatted beside you after school and watched you sleep soundly. At that time, I was silly and thought of some scenes in the movie, and carefully used my hands to test her gasp. Maybe the baby's breathing is too weak. I didn't feel it then. That kind of anxiety is mixed with despair in the movie. My parents weren't there at that time, so I could only burst into tears. I woke you up in the crib, reluctantly opened your eyes, looked at me doubtfully, then giggled and scratched my face with your hands. I call your nickname with tears in my eyes. When you see me smile, you will laugh too. You just turned 100 days that year, and I just turned 7.
The first time I saw you struggling, my face was full of tension in encouragement. Relatives aside teased me that my mother was not as nervous as I was. Watching you learn to crawl for the first time, I suddenly degenerated and crawled with you on the soft bed. Climb the' mountain' where the quilt is folded, and climb the ridge where the pillow crosses. Being with you was my greatest happiness at that time. I don't know if you still remember, before you spoke for your brother for the first time, I had learned to swallow saliva and save candy after candy for you. In your brother's voice, I cheered and announced my joy to every classmate I met.
When you were a toddler, you held my hand and I bent down to enjoy it. See if you can get away from me, I'll tell you loudly. When you babbled, I read Tang poetry and Song poetry by your side, with clear pronunciation and mellow voice. I know my sister has grown up when I watch you go to school with a schoolbag on your tender shoulders, and when you stop being obedient and know how to express your emotions in words instead of crying. Maybe you don't remember your childhood, maybe you will face an unpredictable future in the future; Maybe your head will reach the distance you once looked up, and you will experience all kinds of right and wrong around you. No matter right or wrong, you are my spring.
Thank God, let you be my sister and let me be your brother, just like the spring breeze blowing in the middle of winter, but it is warm and short.