I'm not sure if you're going to be able to do that.

First, I raised a son, must be the same as me, smart, a teach on the will, a moment on the pass, a pass on the fine, a fine on the forget.

Second, I was with my girlfriend to check the information, suddenly popped up a window, very yellow and violent, we quickly lights off.

Third, time is the best teacher, but unfortunately - in the end he got all the students dead.

Fourth, now do not play life, the future life play you

Fifth, the butterfly unfolded beautiful wings flew out of my sight, as if at first, because of their own wrong decision to make something beautiful.

Six, if the sun does not come out, I will not go to work; if it comes out, I will continue to sleep!

Seven, where in the cafeteria, study room, in front of the building in front of the public crazy kissing - are not able to open the room

Eight, I even if it is a toad, I will never marry a mother toad.

Nine, long sleep in the morning; sleep at night like a return!

X. What is survival? Survival is to live by any means necessary.

eleven, although you sprayed cologne, but I can still smell a scum flavor.

twelve, you look at you so ugly, but also out to sneak, stay at home! The first thing you need to do is to get your hands dirty!

XIII, the world's most terrible two sentences, one is, "I love you so much, why do you not love me?"

XV, the choice of lovers to choose and their own match, if not match that also want to choose their own admiration, if you can not admire that at least have to choose a can be mated

XVI, riding a white horse is not necessarily a prince, he may be the Tang dynasty.

seventeen, white horse ah ... you died where! I'm not sure if you've lost your prince, but I'm afraid to come to see you.

xviii. I'm sorry to make you laugh.

nineteen, really fierce, dare to face their own face without makeup.

XX, my eyesight is very poor, for example, see that peg on the wall over there? You can see it, and I can't.

XXI, the city in addition to sexually impotent men, is love impotent men, in addition to these two, only left, women.

Twenty-two, my world, it is not your turn to point fingers.

Twenty-three, our biggest love enemy, not the third party, but the years

Twenty-four, diamonds are everlasting, one on the bankruptcy!

Twenty-five, a college student's minimum goal: peasant women, mountain springs, a little field.

Twenty-six, you have given me the promise of people, but ultimately only left me a brilliant expression, rather than a brilliant life.

Twenty-seven, every morning to get up to look at the "Forbes" rich list, if there is no name above me, I will go to work.

Twenty-eight, wearing other people's shoes, walk their own way, let them find go.

Twenty-nine, others pretend to be, I had to pretend to be experienced.

Thirty, read more than ten years of school, think up or kindergarten better mix!

Thirty-one, ten years later, the court sentenced the murderer to death for the second time.

Thirty-two, bald donkey, dare to steal the teacher with the poor road?

Thirty-three, the road is long, why don't we fight.

Thirty-four, life, easy. Live, easy. Life, not easy.

Funny sayings, friends circle funny sayings

1. I still like you, like the love of the teddy, day day day day air. 2. Li Ronghao wrote a monster to Gu Jiuji, Xue Zhiqian wrote the ugly monster, wrote a model for himself. 3. I have a two-bit friend, really two. One day she withdrew money at the ATM, the wrong password card was swallowed, call me, female: I bank card password wrong machine swallowed. I: ID card with no? Woman: I brought it. I: ID card will be able to get back. 3 minutes after the crying call me that you a liar my ID card was swallowed swallowed! 4. failure is the mother of success, the father of success? Shopping cart point full selection, and then successfully paid! 5. Recent express situation we all understand, logistics girl called a long time in the afternoon to call a SF brother. After the pieces were handed over, the logistics mentioned that we still have to wait for the Roundtree courier to send logistics, the results of the S.F. brother a jacket off to reveal the uniform of the Roundtree: all right, I'm also a Roundtree.6. After the logistics mail, said that we still have to wait for an express delivery of the China Express. At this time, the little brother brush pull off the uniform of Yuantong, revealing the logo of Zhongtong, which is a courier to do great things ah. 7. How important is the interest: to my mother to buy a smart washing machine taught N times will not be used, and then bought her a mahjong machine, not only will use it will also repair it. 8. A few years ago, I entered a 400-person singles group, we agreed to whoever gets married to withdraw from the group, and then I TM into the main group. 9. you! I'm not sure if you're a good person, but I'm a good person, and I'm a good person. The friend circle to make strange mood saying. 10. Don't yell at me, I was scared by the dog when I was a child. 11. Review of the boat said to turn over, the desire to sleep said to come. 12. I am the personality of the person who is open to the openness, not the personality of the person who is open to the openness. 13. I'm looking for an open personality, not an open personality. 13. in the school queue to play hot water, in front of a weak girl, it was not easy to her turn, her thermos lid can not be twisted, turned back to the back of the boys soft smile, I can not twist the lid. Only to hear this man bland sentence: that you stand on the side first twisted, let us first hit the 14.5 million. I am doing barber. One day a child came over to cut hair without money, and then he said to me: uncle last month I cut here. Yeah, I remember. Mom said here three-month warranty. 15. and friends walking and chatting, he suddenly asked: you will for 50 dollars and bend the knee? I said indignantly: How could I possibly do that kind of thing? At this time he walked a few steps, and then stooped down to pick up the ground 50 dollars. 16. thought class, the teacher said: if God in the sky to let him down to spread things, you will let him spread what?A: knowledge, B: money, C: hope. A student immediately stood up and answered: sprinkle B, sprinkle B, the teacher sprinkle B. 17. You will abandon me will not be moved! Why? Throw can not be heavy. 18. Husband: wife, I'll give you a whack on the back? Wife: No need. Husband: wife, I'll go to give you a foot wash! Wife: No! Husband: You let me do some housework! Wife: Husband, nothing you do, just like this to me on my knees at dawn 19. today went to his girlfriend's home to meet the parents, fucking found her sister is actually my first girlfriend in junior high school, and her father is our company's unit leader, the most fucking bullshit is that her mother is actually a high school period of beating the classroom teacher, I'm fucking and your family have a grudge, right? 20. dear husband, you can play hard! Smoke harder! You can smoke as much as you want, and you can piss me off as much as you want! When you get old and can't walk anymore! I will use a wheelchair to push you to the park every day, let you watch me and other old men dancing, and then push you home at night, encounter downhill, whoosh ~ go you, whoosh ~ go you! Let you love to go wherever you want to go.21. You ask me why I am so short, I tell you, when I pull my three-meter legs out of the soil, scared you to death.22. I have served people with the surname of Ma all my life: the first Marx changed my mind, the second Ma Yun changed my consumerism, the third Ma Rong subverted my outlook on life, and the fourth mosaic stopped my exploration of human civilization.23. Male: I will take care of I'll take care of you for the rest of your life, I have ten dollars and I'm willing to give you nine dollars. Woman: What if you have a hundred thousand dollars? Male: Then I'll give you ten dollars! 24. On the subway, the man stood opposite the girl felt very familiar, so it has been looking at the girl. The girl is very annoying: you see what? Then the boy said: I think you and my ex-girlfriend as if. The girl was angry: I am your ex-girlfriend! 25. My boyfriend loves me very much, everything will be for my sake. Today for the first time to go to his home, I was worried about taking off the high heels will let his parents see that I am too short. He took me, a face bright: all right, I told them you have foot odor can not take off the shoes. Boss, don't talk to me about the level - weird space to say

The woman is not onion, the man is not ginger, destiny is not that pepper, but simmered into a bowl of soup

The smart woman will marry a man who loves her as a wife; the stupid woman will marry the man she loves as a wife.

After every disaster, there are always some officials who get rich. The earthquake in Yushu, Qinghai is no exception.

When we look back on our lives, don't always feel the word suffocated written on our faces

If you are destined to not give me the response I am looking forward to, then stay outside the safe distance

For some people, the shopping mall is the battlefield, the love field is the money field, the destiny is the casino, and life is the playground.

Girls like men who play guitar because they create poetry; women like men who play cotton because they create benefits.

People will never know who will say goodbye to you without thinking about it and then really never see you again.

The difficulty of marriage is that we are in love with each other's strengths, but live with her weaknesses.

Every year I work, every year I worry, every day I work overtime like a monkey, I work overtime without pay, every day I get scolded without reason.

The European Union a strong accusation of China to combat piracy ineffective, because the global limited production of six Ferrari only in China, there are seven

Life is only three days, living in yesterday's people confused; living in tomorrow's people waiting; living in today's people the most down-to-earth.

There is always a gap between the ideal and the reality, fortunately there is a gap, otherwise, who still rare ideal?

On the street to see the beauty, a little higher gaze is to appreciate, a little lower gaze is a hooligan.

Yang Zong such a disabled people can pick up the little dragon lady, I'm such a two-armed sound people but a little deaf women can not pick up a

Traveling is to get tired of their own stay in the place to other people get tired of the place to go.

More than ten years ago, on September 1st, I smiled and laughed as I put on my backpack and walked into the school, and from then on, I embarked on a road of no return

Auntie, we will see you at the Broken Heart Cliff in sixteen years, and don't forget to send me a text message then!

The apprentice asked: frogs and toads in addition to how to divide. The master answered in all seriousness: the toad is more sorry.

Maturity is not the heart grows old, but tears in the eyes but still keep smiling.

I don't know much about music, so I'm sometimes unreliable and sometimes out of tune.

No news can be trusted until it is officially denied.

I have become immortal, something please send smoke, the Buddha said there is smoke without fire can not be achieved, there is fire without smoke can not be immortal

People do something good always want to let the ghosts and gods know, to do something bad always think that the ghosts and gods do not know, we let the ghosts and gods are too difficult.

It is not necessary for me to be a part of it.

It's not that I can't do it.

It's not like I don't know what I'm talking about.

The words are spoken by people, the farts are also released by people, talking and farting are the same, are just a breath.

So shameless, so heartless, your weight should be very light.

The relationship between two people is like a sweater, a needle and a thread, careful and long to establish, remove the time as long as a gently pull

There are two major tragedies in life: one is not to get what you want, and the other is to get what you do not want.

A woman has a secret, always thinking to share with her man; a man has a secret, the woman always forced to share with him.

Learn what English ah learn English, you look at the nine standing committees which is an English major graduates, learning English has no future.

Boss, don't talk to me about standards, because my salary is not enough!

After seeing me, you will suddenly realize - the original handsome can also be so specific ah

In fact, I have an angle looks very handsome, only you did not find it.

Since the two prostitutes claimed to be graduates of a famous university, I now generally call myself illiterate!

In class, the teacher was all about me, and I wanted to say: it's just handsome!

Every day I begged God to let me win 5 million, yesterday he dreamed me that every day I begged you to buy a lottery ticket a

Shouting wife is very easy to call Mrs. is not difficult, but called the old lady is a lifetime commitment!

You are very beautiful, but in our group of handsome men, it's not your turn

When the boss uses you, you are the talent, and when you don't use you, you become a cutter!

Life is like a wine jar, people are immersed in it, the longer the time, the more intoxicated.

The only way to see this virtue in today's world is at the table of wine.

You love to take advantage of this person, if you take people's real hand short words, you fucking paraplegic long ago!

I hope: I like people do not roll.

I hope: I don't like the people rolling away.

Life in the world has geometry, why hard to learn geometry. I'm not sure if you're going to be able to do that, but I'm sure you'll be able to. Do not learn geometry and geometry!

qqspace personality to say funny slightly dirty

1, if the next life can choose their own, I would like to do a quilt, press all the people in the world.

2, terrible is not to meet God-like opponent. Rather, it has the same teammates as hmm~~

3, there are handsome men to see a few eyes on the good, thinking that my boy is not as good-looking as it.

4, forgive him is God's business, all I can do is to send him to God.

5, don't talk to me about life, you are not born

6, has always wanted to become a monk, but there has been something in the heart can not let go. --I'm not sure if I've ever had a girlfriend.

7, the school let me know "the temptation to go home" home let me know "the temptation of the school"

8, said life as a play, play as life, then simply sing the play to go le ~

9, the school just know: the world's most distant distance, nothing more than Monday to Friday.

10, I'm losing weight, but I'm not dieting or exercising, I use the idea - I will be thin.

11, I can think of the most romantic thing, is to see you slowly grow old together, and I am still young.

12, there is no hand does not hurt Lipizzaner, there is no love without breaking up, only to stain Tide laundry detergent,

13, the beginning of the beginning, we are all children. Later later, we all have children.

14, I found that my biggest shortcoming is the shortcomings of money.

15, you do not want to pick up my phone straight, do not always let China Mobile to help you say sorry.

16, I and your shoulders are broken, but also did not see the sparks out of the chow!

17, stole my wallet thief turned over only see five dollars, weeping tears sigh: are not easy ah!

18, people in the words of faith, I said not to return the money on the money!

19, the school ah, although you received my people, to you can never receive my heart.

20, baby, I count stars, you IQ almost, you count the moon.

21, some girls and house prices, only to look back to know that you did not start is wrong.

22, I think the lonely man and woman when the girl said good cold is a kind of hooligan behavior!

23, as long as you choose the right university, every day over the Hanukkah!

24, center parting to see the nose, Qi bangs to see the face, oblique bangs to see the temperament, no bangs to see the five senses I am suitable for masked.

25, who dares to bully me in the future, will write your name on the pants, fart boom death you girl.

26, I am very capable of suffering, think about it I can only do the first four words,

27, my wallet is like an onion, every time I open it called me tears.

28, I'm not afraid to drink dichlorvos, I'm afraid to open the lid and drink, and then a bottle.

29, in front of the child of the aunt, please do not comb your hair, I straight want to sing hair like snow

30, the rain poured down who was beside me to hold up an umbrella for me I will be very calm when he is Xu Xian

31, but also fucking with our girls to grab boys.

32, when happiness comes knocking on the door, I'm afraid I'm not at home, so I've always been very home.

33, I'm not afraid of the Hanukkah, afraid of my favorite person is not Hanukkah.

34, I now, the only take up can not be put is chopsticks, the only trapped in can not come out is the nest.

35, if you drink a glass of milk every day for 1200 months, you can certainly live 100 years!

36, "I was" "my friend" "my classmate" and called the three great unsurpassed gods.

37, see others in their twenties on the family property over 100 million, billion, billions, I'm five million, or pixels.

38, a variety of English vocabulary books, the first word is abandon, is not trying to tell everyone: give up

39, as a blue face I suddenly understand the blue face is the exercise of the obligations of the boyfriend but no boyfriend's right to fuck!

40, not to marry for the purpose of love, are in someone else's wife.

41, to fall in love is like playing see-saw, any side of the sudden away or become fat will make the whole game very dangerous.

42, sometimes visit the refrigerator at night, is that is to know how it is doing.

43, my wallet is like an onion, every time I open it called me tears.

44, geeks and nerds standard: in bed with the computer as the center of the circle, to the arm length as a radius to take items activities.

45, you do not want to pick up my phone straight, do not always let China Mobile to help you say sorry.

46, I and your shoulders are broken, but also did not see the sparks out of the chow!

47, stole my wallet thief turned over only see five dollars, weeping tears sigh: are not easy ah!

48, people in the words of faith, I said not to return the money on the money!

49, the school ah, although you received my people, to you can never receive my heart.

50. Occasionally, you will find it very refreshing to have a silent life, but life will be miserable if you have a silent life.