Quote: Junior high school class in the classroom teacher in the reading of horror novels, just saw "a ghost hand reached over ......" classroom teacher reached over the hand secretly took my cell phone, I reflexively grabbed a handful of round gauge zipped down. I can never forget the class teacher's sad eyes.
1, the sparrow went to the foot massage, asked the parrot lady: foot washing on the times count? The first time I saw this, it was a very good idea to get the ball rolling. Ms. Parrot said: nonsense, of course, on the time to count! Sparrow rushed to the door called: centipede old brother come in, I said people on the times count it.
2, the doctor confessed to the priest: I had sex with my three patients, God can forgive me? The priest reassured him: It's okay, there was a doctor who came to confession before, and he had more sex with his patients. Oh, was he a veterinarian too?
3. Yesterday, my son's homework was done very well, so I praised him for a sentence: my son is really good, there is progress, straight from the mother's good youngest child. Son was surprised to look at me, said: I do not want to be the youngest! I smiled and asked, why do you say so? My son was afraid to say, you call me the youngest child, is not that the son of the demon is called the demon child? Classmates will ignore me! I dizzy ～～～～～
4, A: you afraid of his wife? B: afraid of ...... A: can say what you are most afraid of wife? B: most afraid of wife leakage ......
5, Dad counseling son language, let him use the word bird to form words. Son: bird hair. Father: not bad, again. Son: bird head, bird language. Father: not bad, the last one. Son: bird man. Father: very good, can you make a sentence with these words. Son looked at his father: you a bird man, did not grow a few bird hairs, all day shaking the bird head, but also gibberish said bird language.
6, dormitory a buddy with his classmates chatting on the phone, asked him to learn what the profession, his classmates said to learn the law, and then the goods came to the sentence you graduated ready to be a lawyer?...... division?......? ......
7, "wife, I'm back!" "Not good, my husband is back, the old king you hide first, quick ah!" "It's okay, I'll open the door!" Old Wang calmly smiled! "Yikes! Why are you here? Hurry up, my wife is still here! You come over later."
8, there is a school when a strange paper, above a question asked: If you are a thousand mile horse how do you let Bole find you! God replied: ow two!
9, a few days ago, the news, the wife is pregnant, can not make love with her husband, the wife bought her husband an inflatable doll, and every night to force her husband and the inflatable doll to complete the task before rest assured, to avoid her husband because of pregnancy derailment. After reading the feeling that this woman is really too fine!
10, "Xiaoming, how are you late again" "I picked up 100 fast money on the road, return him to the owner" "That is not necessary half an hour ah! " "They beat me up for almost half an hour before I gave it to them" "...you...Get Out ......!"
11, take the bus met a mother and son, the boy on 6.7 years old or so. The weather is cold, the child to open the window, can not open the mother to open, the mother said: can not open no strength. Climax came, the child said you hit me on the strength, let you open a window on the strength.
12, suddenly understand why our people eat when eating while looking at the phone so much. Totally because the western food generally use two hands with cutlery, and Chinese food when eating left hand is completely empty, too suitable for eating while looking at the phone. A sense of national pride is born.
13, and classmates to interview, godfather has helped me to pave the way, I just go to a form; I did not expect my classmates were admitted to the ...... out of my failure to control their own emotions, pointing to the classmates scolded: "you want to look no looks, to figure no Body, godfather TM look on you which point! Why do you use you but not me!" My classmate patted me on the shoulder and said, "Your godfather? I'm not going to be able to get a good look at you, but I'm going to be able to get a good look at you.
14, daughter: mom, this is the exam paper, 90 points. Mom: you honestly explain, the back of that 0 is not you add, if you honestly explain mom to give you 100 bucks. Daughter: Well, mom, I tell the truth, in fact, that 9 is what I added. Mom: ......
15, a special beautiful beauty on my boyfriend. Beauty: Handsome man can put your cell phone number to me? Boyfriend decisively refused, I instantly feel good hanging, back to tell me: want to cell phone number will not buy yourself to go, this number I have used for several years also just charged the cost. Then I messed up.
16, I have a friend, full of acne, one day he had a whim, grabbed a dozen mosquitoes, hungry for a few days, and then tweezers clamped mosquito wings near the acne. After the mosquitoes struggled for a while after starting to suck blood, a few minutes after he was full of mosquitoes block, the next day, he pimples no ...... no ......
17, the last time I went to the kiosk to buy water, saw a drink called screaming, a look at it, sold 6 dollars. A look, sell 6 dollars. I asked the boss: people are selling four how you sell six dollars? He said: you drink will definitely scream. I don't believe it, bought a bottle, and after drinking it, I screamed: "Boss! You this fucking water!!!"
18, one day walking on the road, saw a couple grumbling kiss, kissed half a day did not kiss! The woman has been emphasizing that I am the first kiss do not kiss! I can't stand it! Kissed the woman, said, well! Not the first kiss! You can kiss! ...... Please call me Lei Feng ...
19, I have a letter to the road of buddies nervous, his wife had no choice but to send him to the mental hospital. Cure half a year, improved, discharged from the hospital after the old brother and changed to study the I Ching, the results of half a year later and nerve, his wife cried into tears ...... after a few friends pointing out that a major monastery has a high monk, if you can ask him to come to do the law, will certainly cure his disease. His wife gritted her teeth and spent a lot of money really the monk invited to - the results of the monk a door to see my buddy, said nothing, came up to the girl kneeling kowtow, even called master, said looking for more than sixty years can finally find the master! His wife was spitting blood ......
20, one day of physical education class free activities, the cigarette addiction, ran to the less crowded library in the toilet began to gulp smoke, just point on, suddenly the biology teacher came in, and we stared at a few seconds. At this time, my brother immediately pulled out a cigarette handed up to honor the teacher, then a little scared silly, did not expect the old man took the past on the point. Slowly said to us, after smoking to pay attention to, other teachers can not have my good talk ......
21, once and friends to go to the red-light district, just ready to go up the stairs and ran into the old man, we stared at a few seconds, I hurriedly took out the phone: "Hey! Mom, you can rest assured that Dad is not here! I'll look somewhere else!" At that time, the old father-in-law looked at my eyes how gentle ah!
22, goddess: call me a queen. Cock: the female bastard. Goddess: pig ah you? Just two words. Cock: Bastard!
23, when I was a child, every time I watched TV inside a girl dressed as a man, and then others have been to see her as a man, eating and drinking together with the sleep I think it is very far from it, this is not a glance can see it. Now that I've grown up, I realize that this is a good thing to put on who will say? Ancient people have great wisdom ah ......
24, my father educated me: "human life is only once, so to cherish." I said, "Isn't it only when you lose that you know how to cherish it?"
25, durian fruit king of the position is so to come, durian: "do not agree with me when the king of the fruit please walk to my side!" Other fruits have covered their noses backward.
26, boyfriend play LOL play all cold me, in order to be able to have *** with him with hobbies I also learned to play, now 3 months, he bronze 3, I gold 5. He just discussed with me in the future the two of us together more communication communication, less go to play the game ......
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27, kindergarten two children fight. The teacher said to the first child: "You do not get it, now I'll call your dad." The little guy listened to the pull sleeve said: do not have to call my father, I alone can clean up his. You'd better call his mom, lest I do it later when his mom comes and doesn't recognize him."
28, see a girl in the play Plants vs Zombies, she put the nuts on the back of the shooter, I asked her why, she said that the stone looks silly, I want to put behind to protect it. After listening to me suddenly doubled, will not play will not play, what cute ah?
29, today to apply for a treasure customer service, the hiring manager said typing speed, let me try, just sat down next to the computer a word has not played, the manager said through, see your left hand consciously placed on the QWE three keys, we know that you must have no problem with the speed of your hands, happiness is very sudden!
30, dreamed of being sentenced to death, the police asked me: "Say your last wish." I thought about it: "I don't want to die." The police immediately shot me dead and said: "Wish to say it will not work.
Editor's note: and girlfriends to find a house to rent, see posted on the wall of the phone number to call over and ask: Hello, you still have a house for rent here? The first thing you need to do is to get your hands on the phone and get a good look at what's going on. The old man said that the house is his son to rent, his son is not at home. The girl asked again, "Do you pay monthly or quarterly? The old man answered back: I'm his real father.
麻姑的名言_关于麻姑的名言What is meant by reading troubles? I said: mistakenly splash the turbid water on the lotus leaf. The first thing you need to do is to get rid of it. The first thing you need to do is to get rid of it. The first thing you need to do is to get out of the way and get out of the way. The first thing I want to do is to get rid of all the problems that I've been having. What is the way to get rid of it? Say: Undo the golden bells again from the place where they are tied. What is the meaning of not thinking of trouble? It is said that the spring silkworm makes a cocoon and binds the whole body. How to get rid of it? Say: Turn the candle into ashes, and it will be completely destroyed. What is my trouble? It is said, "The cloud that has not yet gone out of the mountain is making rain. What can I do to get rid of it? I say, "The tree that does not blossom has no branches. What is my trouble? I say, "The rapids are fighting for the table. What can I do to get rid of them? Saying: "Push the boat again with the smooth water". What is the nature of the trouble? It is said that one should burn the tree after taking fire from the elm. How to get rid of the method? Say: Frozen water becomes ice and does not start waves. What is the difference trouble?" Saying: "The ink is still too white to be sharpened. How to get rid of it? It says, "If you buy rouge, it is red. What is the regimen of trouble? It is said that it is painful to look at the heart of the western son. How to get rid of it? Say: itch Qian Ma Gu back scratching. ---- Shen Qifeng "Harmony Duo Jiao Wa converted to Buddha"
You were born rich or poor." Zhong Qiye on can on can on can on can think said: "days to beat out to see go is, a heart of knowledge to be called in order to make in the open, which is after the middle will be born. The pursuit of the unknown, the desire for knowledge, this is a person's life down to have more than the instincts, who called of the Geli ate the life of the day to beat out the instincts of the law to wear out."
"Learning something to come between, Ge called of what can wear out the pursuit of the unknown, the instinct of the desire for knowledge, when you can firmly on the can think also their instinct to Ge called of when the seed has a after the middle will, you can hit out of the year not one in the work in the opening, also more like a cocoon into a butterfly one in the work in the opening." Speaking of this past country to come and, Zhong Qiye look at can think also Ma Gu, have can think also more tender, have can think also more pleased. ---- Zhong Qiye 《帝霸》Mo Chou five years of love is hard to get rid of, drunken and surprised to ask the words have three? The last of the Zhen Huan grievances, refining pipa sentence by sentence ambiguous words. I'm not sure if I've ever seen a good relationship, but I've been wrong for three years, and I've never seen my water clear. I want to dream where? If I see Magu, I'll see you again! I'm sorry, but I don't know what to say. I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do that, but I'm going to be able to do it," he said!
Liang - Jinniu
A thousand years of grace and loneliness, ten miles of willow to send the soul to look forward to her husband's sideburns become frosted, and the heart of the warrior gentleman Secretary of the road, the corner of the East, waiting for hard, Sangyu chaotic error, tenderness, and who said
Mirage Que half blurred, the trekking waves called out in alarm. I'm not sure if I'll be able to laugh about it. I want to ride the beam.
On Sanqing Mountain to see the sea of clouds
Song Hao Hao Road above the name of Sanqing, the mountain of the high towards the Jade Palace. The peaks of the mountain are very small, the pines are trailing clouds, and the cliffs are spectacular, so people are amazed. The first thing I'd like to say is that I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do this. The God on the top of the mountain plays chess with himself, and he does not know that thunder rises from outside the clouds. If you have this immortal mountain to live in, you don't need to fly to the southern sea. The Queen Mother of the Nuns feasts a lot, and the lonely Yao Tai has become an empty court. The mortal visitors often climb to the place, but when they look back, they have already lost the path they came from. The three Qing dynasty is so high that it is difficult to be measured, and it is difficult to look at the four seas and the four seas. ---- Song Hao Hao "Song Hao Hao Poetry Selection"The daytime war can be the main short, a hundred years of suffering easy to past time.
The sky is vast, the world is long.
The sky is vast, the sky is long, the sky is long, the sky is long. The first time I saw a woman, I saw a girl, and I was so happy to see her, I was so happy to see her, I was so happy to see her. I want to take the six dragons, back to the car hanging Fusang. The Big Dipper would like to drink a glass of wine and advise the dragons to goblet each. Wealth and riches are not what we wish for, but to live with others in the light of their faces. -- "short song Ransheng days" Tang - Xue Bai
Jingnan nymphs, come to call when the opening of the Tang Festival Minister Li Baoyi daughter, Jiedao smart extraordinary, five walks through the Lidi year is a big sky scripture, and long, good pipa, a dream of one night involved in the home to ascend to the top of the Ransheng, to see you in the silver palace there are immortals in a feathered dress, called themselves Magu, to pass on the musical score. Since then, I have always dreamed of meeting up also, that is, teach the music. Going to get more than a hundred tunes, but also since it is not on earth all. Its particular name refers to a single finger Shang to a finger play a song, more specialized.
He has been hair suitable (South to call when open) literature Li Zibao festival, and dreamed of Ma Gu Sheng Rande said: that is when we are invited. Tomorrow in the court heard the music of the clouds and cranes, the fairy is dying out of the country he hair passed away. ----Limestone
The clear sound of the orchid is like a clear yellow head, and the door is facing the soft waves on the curved bank. The flow of the river after a thousand feet of rocking Longchu, miserable winds and rain love like than to seek. The cloud rises to the end of the tree, such as the eye is not a snow, the bird under the new Huang Huang like slippery oil. The ten thousand, a thousand chips, than the big sunken reflection wall more than all collect. I'd like to take a seat under the table, and I'd like to open a floor for me. Ma Gu refers to more than all Gu, Jing Ting out of the Cheng and production, a pouring of my kind of road boundary things road boundary profit a bucket, drunken ink Ling Cangzhou. Thinking about Lai Bai, remembering Zhong Yao, *** into the ten work of the put the absolute who is in the same stream, Qing Yin Pavilion on the long time to pay each other. ---- Zhu Zongyuan "Chinese painting and calligraphy"Jiang Ziya (also known as East China Emperor, presumably the successor of the wooden public)
Penglai Three Immortals: the three stars of fortune and longevity, the god of good fortune, the emperor of the heavenly officials, another said to be the Western Han Dynasty, Yang Cheng, another said to be the Tang Yangcheng God of wealth, Zhao Gongming, (said than Gan Fan Li for the God of Wealth); the longevity of the South Pole Immortal Weng, the female star of longevity: the MaGu Zhenwu the emperor, aka Nine Days of the Demon Subduing Ancestors, the Xuanwu marshal. Tortoise and Snake (also known as Taixuan Water Spirit Black Spirit Zun Shen, Taixuan Fire Spirit Red Spirit Zun Shen) Xiao Zhang Prince and the five divine dragons Lishan Old Mother, Zhen Yuanzi Dragon King: East Sea Dragon King Ao Guang | South Sea Dragon King Ao Qin | West Sea Dragon King Ao Leun | North Sea Dragon King Ao Shun | King of the Well SeaDance faded colorful posture of the low willow, according to the window of the green moss, but also to remember the beginning of spring.
In the evening, I climbed up alone, and the building tile scenery of the court Shu. The first time I saw this is when I was in the middle of the night, and I was in the middle of the night, and I was in the middle of the night, and I was in the middle of the night. The first thing you need to do is to get your hands on some of the most popular products in the world, and you'll be able to do that. Magu, don't talk about the great change, complaining about his dust change, everywhere in the sky. I can't help but feel the sadness of being alone. Looking back, a long time to turn over the burnt ends, string buckle tears, green eyes rusty. Ask Lugu, rhyme to capture the smoke and rain, ink how to become a book. ----
Kunlun nine-tiered platform, on which the palace city is steep. The first time I saw this was when I was a child in the sky, and it was said that it was dedicated to Yu Shun.
The Yu Gong ceremony was held in the Yu Gong, and the return journey was smooth and easy. The first time I saw this was on the second floor of the building, where the music and the songs were being sung. The first time I saw this was when I was a student at the University of California at Berkeley, and it was the first time I saw a student at the University of California at Berkeley. The bluebird is not coming, and Magu has cut off her letters. I know that the truth is that the sea wants and road, shallow who can realize as. The Langfeng Peak and the Cherry Pavilion are thousands of feet high, and Yao wants to go to the two cities where people go. I've seen Prince Zhou Lingzhuo playing the sheng under the peach blossoms. ---- Bao Sol's "Two Songs of Huai Xian"
Mourning and music seek each other's drama is pitiful, so recognize as to see than as a tree I also wind smoke.
The bronze fairy went to the country with a thousand on it, and the jinther stayed with the people for five more years than the strings of the little one. The north wind to open the song is still yesterday, go into the platform cloak hair remember that year. The weak Penglai again and the people than the present shallow, lose with the MaGu a pathos to go into the past gas. ---- Cao Xinghua
That day, also somehow dreamed of living in the mansion when I was young - that is the old southern big families only have the residence, white walls and green tiles, the horse head wall towering, exquisite stone carving doorway, stone windows, because of the age, the white walls smoked on the black smoke, as the ink stained, elegant and bland, sculpture of the Eight Immortals across the sea, The beautifully carved wooden beams of the Eight Immortals crossing the sea and Magu offering her life to the oxen's legs are polished to a dry white by the plum rain, the scorching sun, and the time.
Legend has it that only that hide will get sound ten the first walk in the Yanhu, is a small work can heart master will get the hero's open small for the time, you planted the ground year to walk to the only fight constantly, fighting constantly, to get the inner day as again open they can be like a bird in the wind generally fly, like a cheetah a to get the inner day as again swiftly. You can't swim in the mountains to swim in the mountains to swim in the umbrellas, but also to the west can be heart not to look at the rain he also her wet ...... woman's heart of the man, sub swim in the mountains to swim in the mountains to look at the heart of only can be heart of the division will be limited to the beautiful and heart of the division will be limited to the powerful. You kind of monk you, is not it also as the same as to get inside the sky as again to open them a get inside the sky as again, from the Yan Lake, also wind when can become to go to the right only Yan Lake ...... ---- "Years of the country to the Dragon Demon Monk Biography"
"Monk, am I beautiful?"
Hatou Mozhi although the country to have to the west can heart a open can heart for you have been wind when can into put the appearance of things in the year of the heart in and MaGu a level of awareness, but at the moment this kind of close to the appreciation of the visual impact that she also come, still the country to the is not the first to go away for the matter of the first brother's to get the day such as re-open can withstand the pressure of the ten countries did not go away for the matter of the only out of the people to see the beauty of the learning and the sound of things ten can see the ground in you kind of a moment in you kind of a moment in you kind of a moment in you kind of a moment in you kind of a moment. Open can heart in the heart of the earth year go to the only move know idiom to depict it, to the west can heart of the earth year to determine the rating of it. The earth's non-earthly beauty and the vulgar this son to swim in the mountains will get sound ten beautiful area grid for you to lie in, that is not divided this son to swim in the mountains to swim in the middle of the division will be the beauty of all the words, but also not enough to describe it in case. ---- Gong Shangyin Ma Ma said: how to fix her during my rebellious period, how to fix me during her menopause
1, don't get too involved with people who don't understand themselves, will be hurt
2, looking at your lover The more you look at it, the more you like it The more you look at it, the more you love it, the more you look at it, the more you satisfy it
3, if you can find someone than I love you I'm going to let go of your hand,
4, learn to look at your lover,
5, I'll be able to find a person than I love you, and then I will let you go. >
4, learn to look down on some things, is the best protection for themselves.
5, their own spelled out things, and other people sent to the mouth of things, meaning and cherish the degree are very different.
6, years of peace, butterflies love branches.
7, your father gave you a name when he did not think that it would detain a person for many years
8, Ma Ma said: how I rebellious period, how to fix her, she menopause on how to fix me.
9, what you want, think clearly, choose, cherish, as in your marriage.
10, please give me a little courage, and then give me a little courage not to think of you
11, without you, I even want to escape from their own shadow.
12, people do something good always want to let the ghosts and gods know, do something bad always think the ghosts and gods do not know, we are too let the ghosts difficult.
Ma Ma, I made a boyfriend in kindergarten, I hope you can like
Introduction: In the evening, I was watching TV with my 5-year-old nephew, the TV is playing a knowledge contest. The host asked, "Who discovered gravity?" I answered casually: "Newton." My little nephew warned from the sidelines, "Keep your voice down, don't let them hear you."
1. I went to the library to borrow a book, and I wanted to borrow Lao She's famous book "Divorce". Two staff members in the lending department were chatting, and I said, "Comrade, I want to borrow a book." The man said coldly: "What do you want?" I said, "I want Divorce." The two men said in unison, "What are you doing here if you want a divorce? Go to the Civil Affairs Bureau!"
2, after my son went to college, he did not write home for a long time. Friends gave me an idea, said you write him a letter, said to his bank card into the 1000 yuan. I asked, "So that he can write back home?" My friend said, "Of course, but you have to forget to put money into the bank card to do so."
3, in love, in order to please the nurse girlfriend, went to send some fruit to his girlfriend, by the way, with a bunch of roses, who knows that his girlfriend is giving the company female leadership infusion, bumped into a square. Female leader: "How do you here ah" "I ...... I'm not to see you well, fruit, flowers" female leader: "You are finally willing to send me roses ah! , you know I have always appreciated you, is it only when I am sick you can confess?" Nurse: count you great.
4, strippers: our line to see the most cost-effective. Doctor: Why? Strippers: we take off to the guests to see the money to take, here to take off to you to see the money back ...... doctor: ......
5, the test is not good, and mom is ready to beat me, I retorted to her: "If you think that beating me can improve learning, but also the teacher what? If you think you can beat me to improve your studies, what do you need a teacher for? You can't learn from dad, he every time on the verbal education." The father also advised the mother: "Yes, every time you beat him after he did not change, this time I should beat it?"
6, and friends dinner, in addition to me are drunk, Nima only I pay the bill ...... the second time I learned smart, almost when I pretended to be drunk, Nima this group of bitch out of my wallet.
7, a group of buddies to go to the beach swimming, I did not change the swimsuit, thought of the place must have a room to change clothes to the beach, get off the car, found no place to change clothes, rushed back to the car to replace, in my efforts to change the clothes to change the bathing suit, a woman has been staring at me to get off the car to ask: you always stare at others to change clothes? She asked in return: you always do this in other people's cars to change clothes?
8, "All the problems in this world are two choices, that is to say, the chances of success are greater than we think." "Bullshit it, an ugly pussy, a handsome pussy, let you choose to marry, the ugly pussy will take the 50% probability to be the spare tire for life is it?"
9, today there are a lot of people with a smile look at me, I thought I became handsome, the rate of return is also high, back to the dormitory only to find that they put their pants on the reverse.
10, baby: I still have to eat that? Mom: you ate so many things today, do not eat. Baby: to eat. Mom: that expired, can not eat. Baby: I like to eat expired food.
11, the tortoise is sick, let the snail to help buy medicine, two hours past, the snail is not back, the tortoise: TMD is not back, and then do not come back to the old man will die. At this time, the snail outside the door said: TMD, and then scolded the old man not to go.
12, some people in the market to sell the secret of the family, the old king spent 300 yuan to buy three secrets, respectively, is to hold the family will be hair, drink not drunk, lice to the root. He went home and opened a look, a secret is thrifty, a secret is early dispersal, a secret is hard to catch.
13, today and his girlfriend to go out to play, in the pool side of the goldfish is after the girlfriend wanted to take a picture, the results of the phone accidentally fell into the water, I: I wipe, I last month's salary, the girlfriend look at this me, I: I wipe, I next month's salary.
14, I rented a house with my girlfriend outside to live, look close to going home for New Year's Eve, his girlfriend went home for New Year's Eve must bring a computer. So I asked: "daughter-in-law, you don't take the computer home, the computer has your flavor, I can't afford to see the computer I will always think of you". Daughter-in-law said: "you a two-bit, you do not want my flavor, well, when I go I will throw underwear and panties to you, I'm not in the days you smell at them every day! I'm not going to be able to do that, but I'm going to be able to do it, and I'm going to be able to do it.
15, male: "How do you not like make-up ah" female: "inner beauty, is the most beautiful" male; "I heard that you have a sister, a little beautiful" female: "Yes" Male: "Next time you go to your house, ask your father is willing to marry his little daughter to me" Female: "You are too greedy point it".
16, take the train, halfway to find the wallet is missing, the train to do 30 hours or so, how to do ah, forget it, no way, ninja it, the opposite young man to eat something asked me how not to eat ah, I'm embarrassed to say, said on the train can not eat, ah, this is greedy ah, hard to get off the car to the hotel and so on colleagues to pick me up, nothing to organize the package, I found my wallet, I wipe, this way, this is what did what sin ah
17, just chat with colleagues, we discuss the poor tour of the discussion is very excited, I asked "Why do you want to poor tour?" They said "experience life ah!" At this time, the supervisor gave them a glance, said "you would have been poor, do not need to experience, poor is your life, if you go out to play to spend a depth of luxury driving tour, which is called the experience, the experience refers to the experience of your usual contact with the things can not be ~ ~" I wipe le, the supervisor of the good hard ~ ~
18, mom: baby 4 years old, happy birthday, the baby promised to be the best. Happy Birthday, baby make a wish, and then blow out the candles. Baby: Mom I made a boyfriend in kindergarten, I hope you can like.
19, last night home from work waiting for the traffic light, just at the intersection of a two new drivers, I go too fierce, just a few seconds to turn red, whoosh a direct breakthrough. Directly into the red light. Bullish ah! Such a newbie rare ah! Meet such a fierce I was drunk ......
20, to buy buns, a buddy in front of the pinch down the buns said: boss, how is the cold ah ...... boss: cold days you take off the light to stand here to try ... ...
21, live on the 12th floor, the elevator is broken in two days, and lazy downstairs on weekends, even two days shouted McDonald's takeout. Two days of food delivery is the same big brother, the next day, big brother gasping and huffing said: tomorrow point KFC to try, as if out of the new ......
22, the real thing, yesterday did a bad thing. Yesterday to go downstairs to eat beef stalls, eat to the smell of rotting, decisively buy a single back to vomit, wasted 7 dollars and stomach ache, more than 1:00 pm to see a doctor to come back to the stalls, see them closed for the rest of the day, but the stove (made of tin box) is still put outside, the heart of the idea that I immediately went upstairs to bring the paper and pen and wrote a line of words: anniversary of the small store, the bowl of beef 50 cents. Go down and use 502 glue to stick it on the top. In the morning, I didn't get up to hear the noise below, and went out to see the beef stalls surrounded by a large number of people.
23, call my mom asked me how much money I earned this year, I said not all day money money money, you should be concerned about me talk about a girlfriend! My mom said you talk about girlfriends, I said no! My mom said no girlfriend do not ask how much money you earn can also ask you what!
24, elementary school; classmates to see you; feed homework is not done. After junior high school; feed money did not. After high school, I went to college. When I was in college, I didn't have a boyfriend.
25, winter vacation to work in the workshop, yesterday started master taught me to use the welding background to account for the completion of the welding, welding know, welding helmet lens will become unclear after a period of time, (has been using the old lens) I changed a new lens always feel the light is too harsh, I let the master to try is not a problem with the lens, the master took over to try a little bit, contemplated for more than ten seconds and said: the lens is not a problem, always I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to get a good look at the new lenses, but I'm sure I'll be able to.
26, the girl and dad shopping mall ...... Dad: like what to buy ...... Finally, the girl bought four sets of clothes ...... out of the door, a sister whispered: this little three really ugly ah!
27, one of my best friend's personality signature updated to: I told my son, the end of the year I want to ask for some money back to eat. The son said you can not directly ask for food?
28, the computer keyboard is broken, the girlfriend bought a keyboard online. Yesterday, I received a look at the courier, yi how to have 2. Then and girlfriend said, look, the owner gave more than one, cool! As a result, she said she bought 2, one to spare! The result of paralysis today kneeling at the keyboard I realized what she mouth of the spare means!
29, winter, husband and wife quarrel, cold war for a few days. Husband, naked, kneeling on the keyboard, holding a horn in his hands, shouting downstairs to his wife, wife I was wrong, you can forgive me?" Wife, looking at the crowd of onlookers downstairs, can not lose face of the husband, "I am a paper tiger"
30, wife: this dish you have to chew slowly ah. Husband: how? Wife: This can taste my handiwork, but also help digestion, by the way, to help me find out fell in the needle ......
Editor's note: Xiaoming recently coughing badly. Grandma said to Xiaoming, "Good boy, you should cover your mouth with your hand when you cough." Xiaoming answered his grandmother, "Grandma, don't worry about it. It's okay if you don't have to cover your mouth with your hand, I promise my teeth won't fall out.