Wrestling cup for the number, Zhang Xiaoguang's skit
Do not props funny a little bit not too long three little girls acted skit or comedy I remember once, on the way home, I experienced countless temptations! A group of hair salon shampoo girl waved to me, I turned a blind eye; a group of foot massage health care girl threw her eyebrows at me, I was indifferent; a beggar's disciple asked me for help, I crossed my eyes! I sighed y at this world of red lights: "I TM pocket money more good ah!
A Spring Festival Gala in the 90s, Ma Ji brought his disciples together to perform the comic "Five Officials Competing for Merit" is a classic, and it happens to be performed by five people Most of the young people have never seen it before, so you can watch the video, which is hilarious and satirical, and the meaning of the expression is very clear, not to mention that it's an old work, which you'll be able to adapt a little.
The five men in our freshman dormitory are going to perform as funny as possible and not too long
Poor happy: others happy is really happy, I'm happy really poor happy, no matter what, happy teahouse to find happy, quasi-happy, you say is not it!
Audience: Yes.
Second, part of the scenario
Poor happy hand holding a fake hundred dollar bill monologue: you say that people are unlucky to come to the salt shaker, drinking water, teeth, farting hurt, walking twisted feet, when mixed into a fake coin it freeze freeze (100).
The poor happy with a palm hit his face scolded: white open a pair of goldfish leopard eyes.
The poor and happy to show a cunning smile: Dao high feet, the devil is high, there is a method.
The old happy on, the old happy standing on the service platform smiling face to greet the poor happy, poor happy sitting on the tea table, stretched legs.
Old happy: little sister on the tea.
Poor happy: on the best Biluochun, plus a plate of pistachios.
The little happy with the tea on the end: boss, happy teahouse, drink Biluochun, chewing pistachio, happy, happy today, happy tomorrow, happy every day, happy month, happy year, happy to eat happy, drink happy, happy to sleep happy, happy to play happy, happy things happy, happy forever.
The poor happy hand touched the small happy hand: happy! I'm not going to be able to do that, but I'm going to be able to do it! I have a little sister (Mi) with drink is more happy plus happy.
The little happy angry away: indecent assault aunt milk, open your head.
The poor happy to come forward for the poor happy to pour tea: boss I accompany you.
Poor happy: you accompany, bark face, withered grass head, grasshopper waist, fiddle belly, iron pickpocket, but also happy teahouse, disgusting.
The old happy feel self-conscious face, look at their own hands, patting their own belly: not vice heart you, then you slow use it.
Poor happy: checkout. （The first thing you need to do is to find the best way to get the most out of your money.
The old happy nodded and waisted to take over the 100 yuan turn around ready to find money, poor happy very proud face.
Old happy: sorry, this money is fake.
The poor happy: I said you are open-eyed blind, daydreaming, no teeth to say drama, obviously give a true jelly jelly (100), is your transfer, cut stolen, framed.
The old happy: I took the money didn't move feet didn't turn around didn't enter the drawer, I'm not the Mojushi master change the magic, not to mention the Monkey King can seventy-two changes.
Poor happy: I do not care, I give you the real money, have to find eighty dollars. (The poor happy grabbed the old happy) find not find, find not find.
Old happy: not to find not to find.
The first thing you need to do is to get the money to pay for it.
The old happy: you do not want me to find you eighty, I do not charge, counting you drink for nothing.
Poor happy: Hey! You underestimate me, you despise me, I am a big boss, a head of the people with status, how to say drink for nothing, looking for not looking for eighty dollars.
Small happy: you are eating a bear heart leopard gall, dare to mix fake money here. The first thing you need to do is to get the money to pay for it.
Poor happy: alarm good, alarm good, alarm good, I say you happy teahouse what happy, is there prostitution happy, marketing fake money to make money happy.
The old happy: forget it, little sister, for a piece of frozen jelly (100), called the police more trouble, at least to accompany the guests on the smoke on the tea, please sit down, please eat, forget it, back to the money to avoid disaster to find him eighty dollars, lest delayed business.
Poor happy: this is the best policy. (Take eighty dollars and leave proudly.)
Little Happy: We can't be fooled for nothing. (Little happy pretending fake 100. backpack, dressed as the street to take a "cab".)
Poor Happy drove a cab over, and Little Happy greeted and got into the "cab."
The poor happy: little sister to go there.
Little happy: drive forward, go where I want to go.
The poor happy: little sister (dense) really funny, you want to go to the place, how do I know ah.
This is the first time I've ever seen a movie that I've been to!
The small happy with lipstick to the mirror to pretend, poor happy from time to time to the mirror to look back at the small happy: small sister really beautiful, closed moon and shy flowers, sunken fish and geese, is not to the teahouse bar hall *** room that.
Small happy: the dog's mouth lifted the curtain, cock pecked rats, open your car, earn your money. I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do that! The front parking. (Little happy hands inserted in the two purse, hesitation is to take out the real money or take out the fake money. Little Happy blushes and is so nervous, and finally takes out a real coin. Poor Happy looks for the money without looking at anything. The first thing you need to do is to get a good deal of money, and then you'll have to pay for it.
The driver's license is not valid, and the driver's license is not valid for any of the following reasons.
A small happy driver to organize the driver to find change, surprised to find the driver to find a fake five zero, angry teeth.
The first time I saw this, I was so happy to see it.
The old happy: business does not go there.
The first thing you need to do is to get your hands on a fake one, and then mix it with a fake one.
The old happy: I said you have enough to eat but, not just 100 yuan, self-recognition of bad luck.
Little happy: this mold why we pour, people are not good me, I am not good people, people if I am wrong, I will be wrong people.
Little happy to leave: right! I have a way.
The old happy shake his head: alas! The fake money is harmful to people.
(On the stage set up a mahjong table, two men and two women are playing mahjong. A "hu" sound, a small happy shaking his head, the big mom Cui out of money) small happy lost money out of the fake 100 to the opposite side of the big mom, the big mom side of the shuffle don't find the change, a small happy smile.
At this time there is a movement, the door is almost open, all the people collected the money on the table, the big mom can not wait to the money to the waist of the pants under a stuffing, the belly before the bulge of a small lump.
Two policemen came forward: don't move! The crowd is set to gamble and wrestle.
A small happy: police uncle, we did not come to money, together with the poor happy.
The police pointed to the big mom: take out the money, quickly.
Another police officer took out a fine receipt. The small happy eyes from time to time looked at the belly of the big mom, the big mom embarrassed red face.
Police: Each person is fined five hundred.
The police: I have no money, really.
Police: no money, really. (The policeman pointed to his girlfriend's stomach) What's that.
Auntie: That's the belly.
Police: I know it's the belly, what's stuffed outside the belly.
The police: I know it is the stomach, what is stuffed outside the stomach.
Little happy: police uncle, she is pregnant, I also accompanied her to the hospital in the afternoon to do B ultrasound.
Police: she is pregnant, the rooster can lay eggs, do B ultrasound, boys and girls.
Auntie: I did not reach menopause, you!
Police: She is pregnant, the rooster can lay eggs.
The police: the sex identification is against the law, you induce us to break the law ah.
The police roared: I saw the money into the stomach, not honest.
The girlfriend slowly searched the money from the lower abdomen.
The police finger licked saliva and counted the money.
The small happy in a hurry to play ghost face: the woman's lower body searched out the money, licked in the mouth what flavor, sour, sweet, flavor, or rancid taste.
The police put away the money and spit on the ground snapping. The cop walks away.
The big mom is very discouraged: bad luck, just won some money today, and then became a Yang Bailao.
Little happy: the police are still not angry today, I gave you fake money.
Big mom: what, you really bad, that comes.
Little happy: know is that drinking water choking, eating through the stomach, walking heel, car overturned, boat sinking, take the plane crashed into my mix.
Big mom: you are cursing yourself, you do not also mix to me.
Little happy: that you also scolded, you are not mixed to the police.
Little happy, big mom laughed: Ha!
Small happy: then you also get scolded, you are not mixed to the police! Ha! The fake money is harmful to people, should be found a cancel a.
The old happy, the old happy, the old happy.
The old happy up: you are right, this task to the police.
Little happy: that we are not today to the police tipped off.
The old happy: you should be happy, because of the disaster, do a good thing.
The police on: you are at just the right time, in your fines found two fake money, recently fake money in circulation in our city rampant, please return to the police station to assist in the investigation.
All the people looked at little happy, big mom.
Little Happy, Big Mom said to Old Happy: we are innocent victims.
Old Happy: Hey!
The old man said: "We are innocent victims.
Old happy face all the audience: sitting in the boss, master, big brother, big sister, little sister, little brother good evening.
The audience applauded!
The old happy here today to hold a voluntary identification of real and fake coins publicity activities, the activities of the prize, welcome everyone to participate.
The first time I saw this, I was very happy to see that I was able to get my hands on some of these coins.
The old happy dumbfounded: how you back.
Small happy: I how it is, I am a victim, the victim to be protected by the people's police.
The old happy: your conscience does not have a little reprimand.
The first time I saw this, it was a very good thing that I was able to get it right, because it was a very good thing that I was able to get it right.
Small happy: sitting grandparents, uncle and aunt, big brother and sister, little brother and sister, you have suffered from the pitfalls of fake money, please and together to participate in the fight against counterfeiting activities, the following identification of real and fake money prize quiz. 100 tickets to identify the real and fake signs, the answer to a prize of ten yuan, the answer to two prizes of $ 20, the right prize of 100, I wish us this activity to improve the ability to identify real and fake money, let the fake like the street, the ability to identify the real and fake, the ability to identify the real and fake. The first is to let the fake money like a street rat everyone shouting, so that the real money to earn more into our pockets.
A little happy on the scene to ask a few different levels of male and female guests: Mou jelly jelly from the parts of the identification of real and fake.
The audience raised their hands to answer the question:
The old happy site awards.
Finally, a small happy: today the audience to get the prize to earn money, did not get the prize of the audience to learn knowledge, happy happy.
The audience: happy.
Small happy: happy teahouse, happy smile to welcome the world happy guests.
Poor Kaixin on the stage, the audience shouted catch him, catch him. The audience shouted "Catch him, catch him".
Is there a skit for three girls, nine boys, funny. The lines should not be too many, and the props should not be too much.
Snow White and the seven dwarfs, a princess and a queen, seven dwarfs, a prince, and the parents of the dwarfs, well so it is very funny
A short skit for 3-4 people, to be funny, but not too longUnlucky
White: a certain year and a certain date, a certain two people each driving a 10-ton truck in a small alley met.
A (shouting to driver B) the ancients said "what a moment, the wind is calm, back 10 meters, let others go."
B thought: let me let no door!
B: right, then you let it.
A thought: you are pretending to be stupid or really stupid, tube you you are pretending to be stupid or really stupid, I certainly do not let!
A: you let it
B: you let
A: you let
B: you let
A: you let
A: you let
......
White: these two drivers do not give way to each other, the two with his seven-inch tongue and iron teeth fought
The two drivers were not able to win.
A: (listless) I go around the road
B: (energetic) I won
The next day
White: really a pair of children, the two met again in this alley.
A: last time I went around, this time you go around
B thought: no way, let me go around, think quite beautiful.
B: the strongest of the weak understand? See who can consume who
A: I was prepared, look at the compressed cookies
B: I am also prepared.
After 4800 hours
A: I'm done with the compressed cookies, I'll take a detour, but you have to tell me where you got your Pisa?
B: Pizza Home Delivery, delivered.
A: really "Road high feet, the devil high ten feet"
The next day
A: this time I brought: TV, computer, refrigerator, washing machine, closet, single bed, 1000 pounds of rice, rice cooker, solar cooker, solar energy storage appliances, PSP3, NDSi I'm tired of saying this one.
B: What did you bring this time.
A: (horror) The Killer Squad
B: (sardonic smile) Sorry, I brought the SWAT team. Hahahahaha!
The end of the play
Junior high school performances need a seven-person skit simple funny, do not need to be too longDad, I feel that I bias subjects is too serious, I language test 50 points. I got a 50 on the language test. I need to work harder on the language.
Our class has a class meeting We have three people want to perform a skit to drama to be funny Can not be too long, is three men.Happy childhood
five people simple funny skit short a little not too long New Year's Day performance Thank you ahFools go to school
A: Class is in session, class is in session.
B: Eh, class is in session, class is in session, hurry up hurry up class is in session.
A: Good day, class president.
B: Hello, eh, I heard that our class has a new class teacher, or a woman.
A: I don't care if it's a man or a woman, I'll just throw her out.
B: Uh-huh.
C: Eh, good for you two.
AB: Good morning!
C: so early to come, eh, have not heard of our class and change the class teacher.
AB: I know, I know, I knew it already.
C: Eh, and also a woman.
AB: also know, also know.
C: Eh, why don't we stay and fix her. Give her a nickname.
A: Eh, not bad, not a bad idea. I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do that, but I'm going to be able to do it.
C: Eh, called trumpet flower.
A: trumpet flower, too vulgar too vulgar too vulgar.
B: How about this? Let's nickname her Old Mother Hen.
A: Ah, old hen.
B: Uh-huh.
A: Now the bird flu is very serious. And still, still dare to call the old hen.
C: Yes.
B: that call, eh, simply so well, called her spinster.
AC: Good, good, good
A: This is good, this is good, this is good.
B: This is a good idea. So you're going to call it later? (pointing to C)
C: I'm not calling.
B: Then you do it (pointing to A)
A: I won't do it either.
B: Then you don't call either, she doesn't call either, who calls?
C: Eh, there is, stay a fool to come, let him call.
B: Eh, good idea, good idea.
A: That's a good idea.
B: Silly, class is in session, class is in session, class is in session.
D: Come on. (Dance a lap dance out) ~~ laugh what laugh ah? Have not seen handsome ah
A: eh, eh, fool.
D: Uh-huh.
A: There's a new homeroom teacher in our class. We nicknamed her spinster. When she comes, you call Oh.
D: I do not call.
A: Why?
D: You always lie to me, every time I open my mouth, you all shut it.
A: No, I won't lie to you this time.
BC: Right.
A: Let's all scream together.
BC: Uh-huh.
D: Not fooling me this time?
ABC: Uh, yeah, not this time. Call together.
D: Okay, call together.
E: Hello everyone, I am the new class teacher. I heard that the students in this class are particularly difficult to teach, but I'm very loving, and I will put my love, to sensitize them. Good day, classmates!
ABCD: Old.
D: Virgin good.
E: Which one of the young students shouted that the teacher is an old maid, please step forward. (ABC step back together) Young student, please stand up.
D: Uh-huh.
E: Little student, you stand firmly.
D: Teacher: Your ground is not level.
E: Little students, you know what is called a spinster.
D: My father said that people who have not been dealt with are called spinsters.
E: I have confidence, I have patience. Young student, please go to the office with your teacher for a moment.
D: What for?
E: The teacher invites you to eat chocolate.
D: Really?
E: Really, come.
D: Yeah, eat chocolate.
B: Eh, this is called a spinster still eat chocolate?
C: That is, I should have known that we also called which.
A: That's right.
E: I invite you to eat chocolate, Dove's, Goldie's, eat ah eat, you eat full ah. (walk out) I never physically punish my students. Little students you can come out.
D: coming (dancing lap dance).
B: Eh, what's wrong with you? Idiot.
C: Silly, are you okay?
D: The teacher hit someone.
ABC: Let's see, let's see.
A: Alas, not badly hurt ah?
B: Not a bad beating?
E: Next, the teacher gives you the 1st lesson, come on, little students, please stand up.
D: Why me again?
E: to you out of a couplet, which students can answer please raise your hand to answer. Please listen carefully, the couplet is: South Tongzhou North Tongzhou, North and South Tongzhou can be north and south. Which young student can answer? Okay, you're the girl who can answer it?
A: East pawnshops and west pawnshops, east and west pawnshops when east and west.
E: eh, good answer, and which students can raise their hands to answer? Little student, you raised your hand can answer. Come on, please stand up and answer.
D: Answer what?
E: Answer the couplet.
D: What couplet?
E: The first couplet is: South Tongzhou and North Tongzhou, North and South Tongzhou can go north and south.
D: male students female students, male and female students born male and female.
E: 挻 rhyme, good answer. The teacher asked you another one? Fragrant flowers are not red, red flowers are not fragrant, roses are red and fragrant.
D: A loud fart does not stink, a stinky fart does not sound, a chain of farts stinks and sounds.
E: Class president, no farting.
D: Good man, thank you.
E: Oh, I don't believe it's hard for you. The teacher asked you one more? Big fish eat small fish, small fish eat scared rice, scared rice eat water, water fall out.
D: huh! Your husband presses you, you press the bed, the bed presses the ground, the ground shakes. (E hit D) I have answered correctly, you still hit me?
E: what students ah? E: class president, you see the school festival is coming, our class prepared what program?
B: We prepared a recitation for the teacher.
E: Then first we will recite one.
B: Well, first we recite for the teacher is Spring Dawn. Spring sleep.
A: Crowing birds are heard everywhere.
C: The sound of wind and rain at night.
D: A young girl becomes a sister-in-law.
E: (beat D) change, see you still change?
E: Who taught you that?
D: The class president taught me.
D: Why do you keep hitting me?
E: Whenever you make a mistake?
ABC: Teacher, don't hit me, the principal is here.
E: The principal is coming.
ABC: fools run. (End)
Seek a funny skit lines. Requirements are not too longThe style is Mastermind Algebra Jr.