The expectation of health is not to give up expectations, nor to keep expectations, but to
Reasonable expectations.
When this expectation makes you miserable, letting go means letting go of yourself, which means loving your performance.
Some people will think, what should we do, not to expect him?
Of course not.
Intimate relationships without expectations are meaningless.
What all don't need him, don't expect him, don't expect him, still fall in love and get married? Find someone who is angry with himself? Do you think your life is too long, or is it too comfortable?
If you expect too little, you won't feel the benefits of intimacy. If you expect too much, you will always fall into disappointment and anger.
Health expectation is not giving up expectation, nor keeping expectation, but reasonable expectation.
Is to adjust your expectations according to reality.
First of all, you can expect what he can do. For example, many things he does every day. Go home with you during the Spring Festival and occasionally take care of the children. Fix a light bulb toilet, give some money, and so on. Every family is different;
Second, where you can change him, you can expect. You can change him by blaming, flattering, communicating, reasoning, threatening, making demands, etc. When you have this ability, you can expect it.
Then, you can't change his position, so put down your expectations. Even if you really need it, you still have to put it down. Because-
When this expectation makes you miserable, letting go of it means letting go of yourself and loving your performance.
But it's hard. Because the benefits of maintaining high expectations are just one track-minded. Screaming like a baby, simple and easy.
To adjust expectations flexibly, we need to judge and adjust ourselves according to reality.
This is the basic self-function of adults, which is very troublesome and headache.