Generally speaking, people's mentality can be divided into three stages of development: before the age of 30, most of them are "not growing up"; 30-55 years old is "in urgent need of growth"; After 55, I returned to the psychological state of "not growing up". This is a complicated process of mentality change. Why is this? It mainly depends on whether people have fallen behind in the process of growing up, and the foundation is not firm.
First of all, it is still a family education issue. Children in the city usually use clothes to get enough food before going to school, and usually read only sage books after school. Basically, I have never experienced "delayed training", "frustrated training" or "failed training". Basically 30 years old, or "I am the best in the world" naive thinking; The difference is that children in rural areas, especially children from poor families, have not enjoyed the treatment of urban children since childhood. Maybe you are not as knowledgeable as the children in the city and can't keep up with them. But this kind of person, who enters the society, is better than the children in the city.
Second, after the age of 30, the cruel contradictions between family burden and responsibility, work pressure and social responsibility, market competition and insufficient knowledge reserve, and the idea of getting ahead and social reality come together. Mentality changes with the change of environment, and it is always beyond the pressure of actual age. You must "grow up quickly"
Third, when people are old, they may retire immediately or have retired and become abandoned by society. The power of the past has failed, and the connections of the past have gradually drifted away. When people get old, their hearts get smaller and they become children.
Some people may say that there are so many young people who are anxious and depressed now, doesn't it mean that they are "in a hurry to grow up"? On the contrary, this is the outstanding performance of "not growing up". Self-awareness and self-orientation are not clear, which leads to "hasty growth". At best, it can be summed up as a regret that "the teenager doesn't work hard and the boss is sad". The first mistake is that teenagers are not sensible and have never learned skills; The second mistake is that there is no knowledge reserve and ambition is too great. There is pressure to have motivation, and the principle of moderation can maximize motivation. If it exceeds the endurance, there will be useless anxiety; Too low pressure is a waste of life resources. These are all mistakes that young people often make.
Therefore, on the surface, life is troubled by the pursuit of physiological age and psychological age. In fact, there is no premise to solve the reasonable positioning of different stages of life. People are like spring, summer, autumn and winter. It is a natural law to sow in spring and raise in summer and enjoy in autumn and winter. If you don't follow the law, you will set a trap for yourself and be punished by the laws of nature. Of course, this does not mean that one step is wrong. "Never too old to learn" is a remedial measure, which can make their two ages constantly adjust and achieve harmony. Academician Zhong Nanshan, for example, is now over 80 years old, still working selflessly and has not "grown up". And Shen Yifei, who started to study 5G at the age of 17, became one of the makers of 5G standards, and has not "grown up". Therefore, the physical age and psychological age, who exceeds who, are based on strength, not fantasy. For the average person, it is ideal to realize the synchronization of physiological age and psychological age. In one's life, it is the most difficult, but also the most important, to see oneself clearly and position oneself.
Not necessarily the same, it varies from person to person, because everyone's birth environment, education and environment are different, which leads to differences.
Who knows the actual age? Who knows what it should look like? They are all calculating. Not fixed.
I can tell you seriously that people's psychological age and real age are definitely different. Simply put, real age reflects only appearance. And psychological age is experience. So basically there is a gap between everyone's real age and psychological age.
This problem is only blamed on people, who make us the spirit of all things and the top species in the food chain on this planet! Have you ever heard of this sentence? Everyone is the most unique creation in heaven. Believe it or not, problems related to human individual psychology can only be discussed one by one.
Taking the minority as the whole is an important feature of the current "pseudo-psychology" and it is very popular. Anyway, if my visitors simply tell me something and ask me what to do, I will actually be embarrassed. I only heard a few words from you. How do I know what to do? Counselors are not immortals! I can only tell him the truth. I don't know. This problem is actually the same.
However, if we discuss it as a sexual issue, I do realize that there are some opinions to share.
First of all, the development of our physiological age is determined by time! "The road is ruthless, the sun and the moon run", which is independent of our personal will!
But the psychological age is different. Usually we refer to whether a person's thinking and behavior match his physiological age. That is, what to do at what age. Actually, this is not a technical term in psychology. But we can regard it as the standard and degree of a person's mental health. If you are interested, you can check Professor Guo Nianfeng's top ten mental health standards.
When each of us is born, it can be said that there is a psychological blank, and the psychological age can be regarded as zero. This is not scientific, but it is easy to understand. The growth of psychological age actually develops bit by bit with our life experience. Only when we are burned by fire do we know that this thing will make us feel pain. Do not touch it! After experiencing different rewards and punishments from parents and others, I know what I can and can't do! The psychological age of each newborn baby can be said to grow up bit by bit in the process of interaction between the self and the external objective world, and with important people, and in the process of continuous active exploration and feedback.
So from this perspective, I think the physical age and psychological age of most people are actually not completely matched. But there is no uniform standard.
To give two simple examples, a person who grew up in a hard environment will instinctively force himself to adapt to the environment in order to survive, so that he can grow up smoothly. Then, the development degree of his psychological age will definitely be greater than his physiological age. That is, in the popular sense, more mature or precocious than peers. What can be observed externally is that his social adaptability is very strong.
The other one grew up in a stable growth environment. Usually, his psychological age is slightly lower than his physiological age, that is, no matter what he does or considers, he will appear more naive and simple than his peers. The reason is very simple, because in the process of his growth, there is no need to carry out various adaptive psychological development in advance.
Therefore, we will see that the post-70s, post-80s, post-90s, post-00s, and even post-10 are all different, and each generation has obvious brand of its own time! Behind these imprints is actually the change of social environment and cultural environment! Therefore, we will say that the growth environment is one of the important factors that affect a person's psychological development.
In short, moderation is the best! Too rough growth environment can also lead to various psychological problems, even mental illness and mental illness! A smooth growth environment can't make a person adapt to society and healthy life well!
I hope my answer is helpful to you. The greatest value of psychology lies in our happy life!
Everyone is exposed to different things, and their psychological age is different, but everyone will experience something that can make them grow. For example, a woman feels that a man has broken up psychologically, and this breakup has made him embark on a mature road. Some people are not mature enough because of the mountains behind their parents. When parents are old, they can only learn to mature by themselves. With children, more responsibilities will naturally mature, so experience will make people's inner age mature. ! ! !
Not necessarily. Psychological age is related to experience.
Physiological age is the competitive state of your physical indicators.
The actual age is your age.
psychological age
These are three things.
If you are 40 years old, but your physical condition is still 25 or 6 years old, will you still think like an ordinary 40-year-old?
Certainly not, because your ability is strong and your methods will be stronger.
inconformity
inconformity