Guard 1: General, let's go in.
Lian Po: Don't worry, dial a harassing call first!
Lin Xiangru: Hello, this is the anti-fraud hotline. I am an old fan who has been cheated by myself. With years of experience, I can make a clear judgment on whether you are fooled or not. ~ ~ ~ Please press 1 for abductions, 2 for cars, 3 for brain teasers and1/kloc-0 for stretchers!
Lian Po: Hello!
Lin Xiangru: Hello!
Lian Po: Excuse me, are you Premier Lin?
Lin Xiangru: Ah ~ Who are you?
Lian Po: This is ~ ~ ~ I have a question to ask you directly.
Lin Xiangru: Ah, you say it!
Lian Po: We have an old sow with white flowers in the dark. She got up in the morning, opened the door and ran at 80 mph. She hit a tree and died!
Lin Xiangru: Killed? Is there anything wrong with the pig's eyesight?
Lian Po: Both eyes are 1.5!
Lin Xiangru: Any mental illness?
Lian Po: I am mentally healthy!
Lin Xiangru: Then how could he be killed?
Lian Po: Because that pig can't think fast!
Lin Xiangru: I said you are not particular. You don't play by the rules. Press 3 for a brain teaser. In that case, I also ask a question!
Lian Po: Say it!
Lin Xiangru: After the Spring Festival, our family didn't buy new year's goods, only a pig and a donkey were left. Do you think I should kill the pig or the donkey first?
Lian Po: Then kill ~ ~ first and give you two chances!
Guard 1: Donkey meat is delicious! Kill the donkey first!
Lian Po: Kill the donkey first!
Lin Xiangru: Congratulations on your correct answer. So is the pig! ~ ~ ~ demo, ~ ~ hum!
Lian Po: Sadness, I really sympathize with you. I plan to travel alone. How can this reassure me?
Guard 2: General, kill the pig first!
Lian Po: That donkey thought the same thing! I'm telling you, it's not good for you to kill anyone first on this issue! Why didn't I answer, just because I thought he had a problem! ~ ~ Eh, see? He has grown from a neck in those days to two calves now!
Guard 1: General, he is too powerful. I think we should go back!
Lian Po: No, the kidnapper tricked him into limping, and the seller tricked him. If I don't get rid of him in 10 minutes, I can't be a teacher with you two!
Guard 1, guard 2: general leads the door, fool someone!
Lian Po: OK, look me in the eye and go in! Beautiful him, look, aha, he ran away, where to run!
Guard 1: Is Prime Minister Fan there?
Lin Xiangru: Hello, who are you? You ask ~ ~ ~ er, er, er, er, er, er, er, er, er, er, er, er, er, er, the pig hit the tree. You hit a pig, didn't you? Did you rear-end the car? Why did you change it to 3 again?
Lian Po: I have missed you for three years!
Lin Xiangru: Fool!
Lian Po: I've come to confess to you!
Lin Xiangru: Keep fooling!
Lian Po: My apprentice is my witness!
Guard 1, Guard 2: Hmm!
Lin Xiangru: I fooled me by organizing a group. It's hard to fool me. As long as we good people are alert to you, what can you do? Huh? Just a few brain teasers! There are/kloc-0 monkeys on the ground, and there are 7 monkeys on the tree, which are both two monkeys and eight monkeys!
Lian Po: Maybe three monkeys, maybe nine monkeys!
Lin Xiangru: Why has it changed again?
Lian Po: Pregnant with a monkey!
Lin Xiangru: Is it interesting?
Lian Po: It's boring. I won't give you a brain teaser. I'm here to apologize! In the past three years, the most sorry person in this world is Prime Minister Fan. What a nice guy, I always tell you, why do you think I lied to him? How honest and honest! You hit me twice, you can't, you scold me, you can't open your mouth, so, anyway, you forgive me, I will, forgive or not, I will come with sincerity!
Lin Xiangru: Yes, yes, yes, it's still paved!
Lian Po: Help me up!
Lin Xiangru: Yes, I can stand up. There's nothing wrong with it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Take two steps. Take two steps, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh? Everyone is watching, and everything has nothing to do with me! Why do you always hang around like this? Get up! What's the matter? Will you speak quickly?
Lian Po: Do you want to hear it?
Lin Xiangru: I want to hear it!
Lian Po: Did you get your letter?
Lin Xiangru: I believe you as long as you stand up!
Lian Po: Go away, I can stand up!
Lin Xiangru: Say it!
Lian Po: It's a long story. I remember it was the first snow in 2003, a little later than in 2002!
Lin Xiangru: What do you do with the lyrics? If you have something to say, just say it!
Lian Po: I won't play with you. I will apologize to you today. Get the goods! Look familiar?
Lin Xiangru: Is this the hundreds of dollars you cheated me of?
Lian Po: Not a penny!
Lin Xiangru: Which watch is this?
Lian Po: I haven't seen it yet!
Lin Xiangru: Big Brother! ! ~~
Lian Po: It's time to end the feud between us, and. The culprit is Vitex negundo, which has delayed our feelings in recent years. Today, I must smash it in front of you!
Guard 2: Generally, it can't be broken!
Guard 1: General, this thorn is a witness to the reunion of your old brothers!
Lian Po: Don't talk nonsense, I, you can't stop me!
Lin Xiangru: Brother, you want to hit me, so sincere. The children are right! It is not only a testimony to our reconciliation, but also a reminder to me to avoid being fooled again in the future. I have collected it!
Lian Po: No, how do you accept the money the child gave me?
Lin Xiangru: I will pay for it!
Lian Po: How much is it?
Guard 1: two thousand!
Lin Xiangru: I'll give you two thousand!
Lian Po: I'll give 2500!
Lin Xiangru: I'm three thousand!
Lian Po: I'm 3,500!
Lin Xiangru: I'm four thousand!
Lian Po: I'm five thousand!
Lin Xiangru: Deal!
Lian Po: Put it on Prime Minister Fan.
Lin Xiangru: You shout five thousand, and I'll carry a hammer. Deal!
Lian Po: No! You remember wrong. How did you shout?
Guard 1: I heard that it was called by Prime Minister Fan!
Guard 2: No! It's the general
Lin Xiangru: Look!
Lian Po: What a mess! What a mess! Well, it doesn't matter who shouts! Look at us. Who shouted first?
Lin Xiangru: I called first!
Lian Po: How much did you shout?
Lin Xiangru: I'm two thousand!
Lian Po: I'm 2500!
Lin Xiangru: 3000!
Lian Po: 3500!
Lin Xiangru: 4000!
Lian Po: 4500!
Lin Xiangru: 5000!
Lian Po: Look!
Lin Xiangru: No, I am a wisp myself!
Lian Po: Then you are in a mess!
Lin Xiangru: Forget it, 2000 2500 3000 3500 4000 4500 5000!
Lian Po: Yes!
Lin Xiangru: Eh,
Guard 2: I remember wrong, it was called by the general!
Lin Xiangru: No, no, big brother, I called 4000, and you directly called 5000, right? Right?
Audience: Yes! ! ~~~~~~~~~~
Lian Po: Well, it's a mess. Since my brother and I agreed to accept it, let's shout it again and find out who is shouting this 5000. That! ~ ~ What's the starting price?
Guard 1: 2000!
Lin Xiangru: I'm 2000!
Lian Po: Deal! It's not messy this time!
Lin Xiangru: No, didn't you call?
Lian Po: Yes, I'm afraid I'm confused!
Lin Xiangru: Ah! Don't move, this thorn is mine!
Lian Po: I'm telling you, bro, you shouldn't ask you for money. You are still very proud. You have to take care of people, but ~ ~
Lin Xiangru: But I was fooled by giving it to you!
Lian Po: I tell you, I didn't think about it at first ~ ~
Lin Xiangru: Eh, eh, rob it instead?
Lian Po: You are mistaken!
Lin Xiangru: Come on. From the moment you entered the room, you used a bitter plan. When you were caught, you used many tricks. Master and apprentice cooperated with the plan to smash the car and suddenly dropped the mallet. I only used one plan!
Lian Po: Let's play!
Lin Xiangru: Here's a plan for you!
Lian Po: Walking is the best policy!
Lin Xiangru: No!
Lian Po: It failed. Do you know why I failed? He is a prime minister who only reads the art of war without reading the menu. Get out!
Guard 1, Guard 2: General! ! ! ~~~~~~~~~
Lian Po: What are you doing? Where are you kneeling? I'm here!
General, I'm sorry. Your IQ is too low to learn anything from you!
Guard 1: What are you doing? Let's go You won't catch the No.2 bus for a while!
Lian Po: Sad!
Guard 1, Guard 2: General acceded to the throne, disciple bye!
Lian Po: Yes, yes, yes! The world is crazy. Rats are the bridesmaids of cats! Oh, my God!
Guard 1, Guard 2: General, please accept us!
Lin Xiangru: Aye, aye, aye, son, you can't finish reading the book. Just learn it well. Give you a red envelope in the New Year, ah, a red envelope!
Lian Po: Can you take this money? Didn't I pay you both last month? Sad, really sad!
Lin Xiangru: Come on, everybody, hold it!
Guard 1, Guard 2: General Xie!
Guard 1, Guard 2: General, take it down!
Lian Po: Ha ha ha, anti-hegemony!
Lin Xiangru: Alas, it is impossible to prevent! But if you lie to me, I will not accept you. Don't fool me. I'm still making thorns?
Lian Po: What do you want?
Lin Xiangru: What about your promise? Where is your stretcher?
Lian Po: Develop it yourself!
Lin Xiangru: Eh!
Lian Po: This is customized for you. If it is short, it can be lengthened!
Lin Xiangru: Yes, you took great pains for me. Thanks to my superior plan, I opened the red envelope!
Lian Po: Huh?
Lin Xiangru: During the Spring Festival, I send you a pair of couplets: "Turn around for a year, shake your destiny for a year. Thank you! "
Lian Po: I'll give you another rhetorical question: "Self-taught"!