Teach children to use the strategy of "red face and white face", okay? The inconsistent attitude of parents will greatly reduce the effect.
If both husband and wife, whether father or mother, are educating their children, the other will always say something in the opposite direction.
Then it is easy to create obstacles for children to recognize things.
In fact, children's learning and cognition of things are initially guided by their parents. If parents' ideas cannot be unified, then children's cognition of things will definitely have some confusion and obstacles.
In this case, our educational effect on children will be greatly reduced, or it will have little effect.
What is the impact of the education model of "red face and white face" Many times, when parents adopt the "double spring" education model of "singing red face and bad face", it is easy to see that the party responsible for the blame is too excited.
Under the influence of this exaggerated bad atmosphere, children's fear of their parents will deepen and they have to bow their heads and admit their mistakes.
The problem is that this kind of education can't really make children realize their mistakes and the direction of correction in the future. Many times, they are just afraid of their parents looking particularly angry or exaggerated.
Therefore, this kind of education is really not a good and recommended way to raise children.
What consistency should parents pay attention to when educating their children is to act with a reliable and consistent concept, so that children can understand what parents expect of them and what they can get from us.
Children need this consistency. They need to know what their parents expect, so that they can feel that their parents are reliable. It can make children understand what their world can expect and do, and make them feel safe. This predictable, subtle and close attention has created children's safe attachment.
Consistency allows parents to provide a "safety mechanism" for their children, that is, even if the children do something wrong, they will understand why parents are angry. Consistency will give children a safe fortress and a clear behavioral boundary to guide them when they are emotionally broken.
When teachers and parents are too strict and control their children, children can't cultivate a sense of responsibility. Only when children's sense of responsibility is kind and firm, dignified and respected, can children have the opportunity to learn.
In short, singing "red and white faces" is not conducive to the healthy personality and mental development of children, and may even lead to children's wrong values and "double-sided" personality.