So I'm anxious to record my thoughts now.
But after writing, I found that I still have a lot to say, so I decided to make a video, combining the contents of the book, to talk in more detail about how parents should care for and guide their children.
There are also words and videos. From two different dimensions, this book is wonderful.
I hope you can all read it carefully, and I hope you can tell me your inspiration and singing skills.
Recently, there was a film against school bullying called Good Days. Have you seen it?
There is a villain named Wei Lai, pure and beautiful, harmless to people and animals. She is a good girl in the eyes of her parents and has excellent academic performance. It's hard for you to connect her with school bullying.
But she is the one who abused her classmates, took nude photos and even indirectly killed a girl.
Wei's distorted personality is closely related to his parents.
Her father ignored her for a year because he repeated reading.
Later, she died unexpectedly. Her parents didn't show much sadness when they identified the body. Instead, they generally sighed and turned away.
Growing up in a cold and violent family, normal children will become abnormal, which also leads Wei Lai to go astray step by step.
The reason why Xiao Bei and Chen Nianzhong can appreciate each other is also closely related to their family background.
Bay was abandoned by her biological mother at the age of 13, and never recovered. He became an unscrupulous gangster, beaten by others, beaten by others. However, Chen Nian, his father disappeared, his mother worked outside for a long time, and creditors often came to collect debts. She is introverted, doesn't like making friends and feels insecure.
People who live in the gutter have never been loved well.
At the Asian Family Therapy Conference, a famous Japanese family therapist, Mr. Yoshimura Tamura, said, "All school bullying is caused by family problems."
This film not only tells about the campus, but also urges us to think deeply: how to guide children to the right path and become a kind and upright person.
The reason why better days are mentioned is that children's growth path will be influenced by many factors, and parents are their best teachers.
The child is pure in heart and full of yang. As long as they are provided with a good environment, they will naturally be healthy. And we adults are their environment, and our health and emotional state directly affect them.
Do you find that we are in a hurry every day now?
Everything is "the sooner the better". We hope that children can be smarter than others after a few early education classes, and they can get better after taking some medicine when they are sick. They learn swimming, dancing and painting. We hope they can learn everything better. We also hope that they can grow up quickly and save snacks.
We are anxious, irritable and impatient. Because of this, parents spend less time and energy on their children. But is this really good for children?
A child should grow up in a safe place from an early age. He needs to feel enough love and tenderness to establish his own self-esteem system, which school education can't give him, and more importantly, his parents.
If you don't understand your child, have barriers, and impose your ideas on him for a long time, he will certainly resist for a long time.
Just as many parents have a headache about what their children eat, they never think about letting their children eat what they want.
Some parents will force-feed or even scold and punish their children, which will only replace their natural development.
Everything is a rule. If you don't respect the child's rules, his body will fight back.
When a person is physically and mentally exhausted by the pressure of work and life every day, he is incapable of loving children.
You can try to think about it. When you are busy at work recently, the mortgage is waiting for you to pay back, your parents are often ill, and all the "bad things" accumulate together, you must be on the verge of collapse and have a very bad temper.
At this time, if you catch up with an uncomfortable child and want you to hug him, you may find him annoyed and say to him, "Leave me alone and play by yourself."
When you hear him cry, you will feel that he is particularly ignorant and will yell at him and scold him.
However, what did the child do wrong?
He just wants a little warmth and love from you.
When you are anxious, your child will feel uneasy, and your body will be nervous and unable to function normally, which is not a good thing for your child's illness.
But when you are in a comfortable and safe state, your child can feel that he can get rid of fear and anxiety with you.
In the book Children's Health Notes, I like that "the mental state of parents will affect the health of children, especially the mental state and emotions of mothers will be directly passed on to children."
Everyone is an energy body, and the material part of this energy body works. It may be the movement of qi and blood, the beating of the heart and the distribution of body fluid. Then there is another level of energy, which comes from intangible things, such as emotions, will and so on.
For example, if you see that your child is slow-witted, introverted, does not like communication, and often has some anxiety problems, you can probably imagine his state in the family. Maybe there is a lack of communication between parents, and no one listens to him. Some things will accumulate in one place and finally show up in the form of matter, that is, qi and blood block.
Parents' feelings and attitudes will soon be perceived by children, and many children's performances and behaviors are only feedback to parents.
Nowadays, children are mostly deficient in cold, which is also related to their parents.
Parents usually like to eat fruit and drink cold water, and children will naturally follow.
Some mothers are pregnant, don't avoid their mouths, and eat everything. Their spleen and stomach are poor and their function will be weak.
Some children get sick repeatedly, cry easily, sleep badly and have emotional problems.
It's all related to the low energy at home, and it's also influenced by your own mother, who is not easy to decide.
Modern people lack the soothing and quiet spiritual environment of ancient people, and adults are very restless and can't give children a good spiritual environment.
The author Xin Li wrote this book while studying in France. He knows both the world and himself. In his works, you can feel a little peace of impetuous society.
Chinese mothers live too nervously, worrying about whether their children eat well, dress well and feel uncomfortable every day. When their children feel a little sick, they will panic. When they heard sneezing, their hearts began to rise to their throats.
There is a point in the book: "It is normal for people to get sick when they eat whole grains." I agree with this statement, but the author's treatment of some diseases is not desirable.
When the child is ill, we need to do two things. First, learn from every illness, record every illness and treatment process, and help you establish a logical thinking process. Remember it a few times more, and you will probably find a pattern from it.
The second is to have a peaceful mind and a state of meditation. Only in a calm state can we see the truest situation of children.
I can't calm down. Every time my child is ill, I am anxious to deal with the illness and go to the hospital distraught. I will take whatever medicine the doctor prescribes and do whatever the doctor says. I have no idea about the whole illness and treatment process of the child.
Some people think that Chinese medicine is too slow. When the child had a fever, he thought that "the fever must be reduced tonight", so he gave him a lot of western medicine. But after taking the medicine, I will continue to have a fever soon. Is this effect fast or slow?
Fever is a cumulative thing. It will definitely take some time to get back to normal.
If parents are taught this course, no one will teach it. We will need setbacks and difficulties and we can only explore and explore on our own.
On the way to take care of children, the status of parents is very important. You must take good care of yourself and be a healthy pillar of your child's words and deeds.
If the relationship between parents is not good, or the atmosphere at home is cold and hostile, these will have an impact on the child's physique, and it will be very easy to get sick and will not be a very gentle baby.
Just like the children in Children's Health Story who take pleasure in bullying others, their parents have no idea how to be a good person.
Parents should be the confidence of children, the dependence of children and the root of feeling loved.
Finally, I like a sentence in this book: "Disease is the presentation of the overall quality of life. Base yourself on your heart and live a good life. To treat physical diseases, the biggest regulating valve is still in life. "
How to love children more and ask less depends on how to love yourself more, ask less and accept yourself more. Only when you get better can children grow up healthily with you.
The German philosopher Jaspers once said, "Education means that one tree shakes another tree, one cloud pushes another cloud, and one mind shakes another".
May we all be the best parents, children's best doctors and families' staunchest reliance.