Some people are particularly afraid to participate in social activities and communicate with strangers, so when there are many people, they will feel uncomfortable and have a strong social phobia. This situation is simply called social disorder, which is unhealthy.
Socialization is our social activity. Broadly speaking, socializing includes making phone calls and greeting strangers. In a narrow sense, socializing refers to attending parties, socializing, dances and other social activities. People have a strong social attribute, and it is impossible to live safely alone without knowing anyone. You always have to know several people, including relatives, girlfriends, partners and brothers. The essence of social communication is the exchange of values between people. If you help him, he will help you. You learn to appreciate him, he likes to talk and laugh with you; You like listening to her, and she likes watching you smile. Everyone is a lonely individual and needs to get in touch with the outside world through social interaction.
The reason why many of us feel unhappy in social activities, even produce depression and psychological burden, or vilify each other or even fight is because we have not mastered the principles and standards of health in social activities. No one can cover everything, but if you are liked by everyone around you, there are always a few people who don't like you. You are not RMB, why does everyone like you? In fact, in social activities, if you know in advance that people you hate or people who hate you are present, you'd better decline politely. If you go to such social activities, firstly, you feel uncomfortable, and secondly, the other person feels uncomfortable. The exchange of social values must be impossible, and it is meaningless to participate. Why bother?
We say that the essence of social communication is the exchange of values. The so-called value, not only refers to the actual interests, but also allows you to learn knowledge, make you happy and keep smiling. These are all values. When there is no positive value in the process of communication, not only the social activities fail, but also the psychological burden in the process of interpersonal communication will increase invisibly, and even resentment will arise.
Therefore, in order to ensure that we have a healthy and comfortable social relationship, we must pay attention to social boundaries. What is "social boundary"? For example, Zhang San has set several social boundaries for himself: first, he will not participate in social activities with a large number of people; Second, social activities that are too far apart at the circle level do not go; Third, people who don't like social activities don't go;
Everyone's adaptability is different, so everyone's "social boundary" is different. Some people are born with things and are keen on making friends; Some people only associate with friends at the same circle level; And some people are only keen on making friends with the opposite sex. Therefore, as long as everyone sets their own social boundaries, social interaction can be valuable and comfortable.