Patient doctor, please listen to me carefully. What's going on here? It always gets stuck.
There is no need to listen to what doctors (and patients) listen to. You go for an X-ray and CT scan. I'll show it to you when I get back.
Patient ... How much is the fluoroscopy?
Doctor, 250. CT 888。
Patient (standing up and sitting down in shock)?
Why did the doctor sit down again? Let's go
Patient (stands up) Ah ... Ah, that's expensive.
Nurse (what do you want to say to the patient, see him leave and turn to the doctor) He is not ill. Why do you want him to have a fluoroscopy?
How can a doctor buy a laptop for his grandson if he doesn't see through it? How can I earn money to buy a mobile phone for my second grandson without CT? (Shouting) Next!
Nurse (shouting) Come in on the 3rd!
[The patient enters the room outside the door. Cui Yongyuan poked his head out of the consulting room.
The nurse sat down (looking at the patient).
The patient sat down.
Doctor, what's the matter with you? What's the matter?
The patient has a toothache.
Doctor, toothache is not a disease, but it hurts badly. Open your mouth and let me see ... nothing! Nice mouth!
How does the patient hurt?
Doctor, a good mouth doesn't mean you're not sick. Two molars were bitten by insects!
Patient? Is it serious?
The doctor is not serious. What are you doing here?
Patient? That's right. Doctor, what are you doing?
There seems to be a hole on both sides of the doctor ...
Patient hole? How big is this hole?
The doctor is quite big, ah, I can't see clearly. You go for fluoroscopy first, and then do CT.
Nurse, he has a toothache. Just prescribe some medicine!
Patient: Yes, I'll prescribe some painkillers for you.
Doctors (and nurses) what do you know! Can you see where the bug is without perspective? Can you find out other diseases on him without CT? I suspect that he has other diseases. Say it (to the patient)! Come back! You'd better have a B-ultrasound.
Patient?
Nurse, you let people do B-ultrasound, and they are not pregnant!
The patient is. I am a man. There is a mistake.
What's wrong with the doctor! You can see clearly by B-ultrasound. Even the male and female can see it. I mean the bug on your teeth!
[The patient leaves in doubt. Cui Yongyuan came into the room.
Nurse (to the doctor) I said relax!
What is the doctor doing? Shout!
Nurse (turns around and shouts) Next! (Seeing Cui Yongyuan already standing at the door) What are you doing here? Why do you look so familiar? Old man, he looks like Cui Yongyuan!
Doctors are nothing!
Cui Yongyuan, if it isn't uncle! I'm Cui Yongyuan!
Doctors and nurses? Are you really trav?
[The nurse takes off her mask.
Aunt Cui Yongyuan, what are you doing here?
Nurse, I am your uncle's assistant! Sit down!
Cui Yongyuan (sits down and asks) Aunt and uncle, how did you become doctors?
You don't know about the doctor? It's been over a month!
Nurse, I asked you to tell Trav, but you wouldn't let me.
Cui Yongyuan, why? I didn't offend uncle!
Mammy, he said, I'll tell you when I'm done. So I can surprise you!
Cui Yongyuan, don't surprise me. Uncle, this doctor has been working for more than a month.
Doctor, 50 days, to be exact.
Cui Yongyuan (looking at the clinic) This has changed a lot. I remember the last time I interviewed you was six years ago, and that was in-
The nurse is in CCTV, and you invited us. It's been more than six years. I miss you so much!
Cui Yongyuan, I miss you, too. I don't understand how you became a doctor. Look at aunt, like a nurse.
Nurse, you have a good eye.
The doctor (told the nurse) went to turn over the sign and said that he would not make house calls today. I want to make out with trav. Just chatting.
Cui Yongyuan gave me a fright.
[The nurse went out to look at the sign of all diseases clinic and came back.
Cui Yongyuan: I saw a sign on the door that said "All Diseases Clinic". Uncle, you can always cure all diseases. Why didn't you tell me last time?
Nurse, he can't cure all diseases He is bluffing!
Doctor, what are you talking about? Nonsense in front of trav! I can't cure it. Can somebody else's health center hire me? Can you let me put up the sign of universal clinic? I'm not bragging. This multifunctional clinic is the only one in China. Who dares to hang up?
Nobody dares to hang up in Cui Yongyuan.
Doctor, this is the result of the reform!
Cui Yongyuan is still the fruit of reform. This hospital was reformed in this way. Uncle and aunt, I want to ask, how did you become doctors and nurses in the hospital?
Doctor (nurse), you let him talk!
Nurses are engaged in the reform of health centers and open tenders.
Cui Yongyuan, it's for doctors and nurses.
Nurses are contracted clinics of various departments in hospitals. The news reached us and I came as soon as I got together with your uncle.
Cui Yongyuan recruits doctors and nurses. Why did you get hired?
Doctors are good doctors. Who will come to the township health center? The rest are 255 doctors. Just don't tie the living to death. That's why we need to recruit openly.
Cui Yongyuan: So you're hired? I still don't understand. Why do you have to be a doctor and a nurse after graduation? Do you have a certificate?
Doctor's certificate? What certificate?
Cui Yongyuan is a certificate, a certificate or something that allows him to practice medicine.
Doctor, I have proof.
Nurse, he does have a certificate.
Cui Yongyuan? Well, if you have a certificate, you can apply.
Nurse, his certificate is a veterinary certificate.
Cui Yongyuan? Is it a veterinary license?
It's good that a doctor has a veterinary license. In our place, undocumented people are still on duty.
Cui Yongyuan, they have a lot of nerve here. The competition must have been fierce at that time, uncles and aunts. How did you get hired?
I also went to the nurse recruitment. The fight.-Oh, my God! All red eyes! That man is coming! It's like taking Shenzhou 10 for nothing.
Aunt Cui Yongyuan, Shenzhou 10 hasn't been built yet.
The last interview for nurses, don't you want me to think about tomorrow? As soon as the Spring Festival Gala program was broadcast, we had a good imagination with such a knot in our heart. After the success of Shenzhou 5 and Shenzhou VI, it was circulated that our country would build a moon city on the moon, saying that Shenzhou VII would send rabbits to the moon first, Shenzhou VIII would send our astronauts to the moon, and Shenzhou IX would build a city on the moon. When God 10 arrived, he took people to Moon City to play.
Cui Yongyuan, they really dare to imagine. Aunt, tell me about the job fair at that time.
The doctor's situation is that the hospital has proposed to contract various departments. Like selling animals, the reserve price is 50 thousand.
Cui Yongyuan, I know this. Contracting a department will give the hospital 50 thousand.
Doctor, 50 thousand is the least. Like obstetrics and gynecology, surgery has to pay 654.38+ 10,000.
Why is Cui Yongyuan so different?
There are many doctors in obstetrics and gynecology and surgery. There are many children in rural areas and many people who come into contact with work, so the income of these two subjects is more. There are also many reserve prices.
Cui Yongyuan is like this. There is nothing wrong with charging more.
Doctor, so from the beginning, everyone has been working hard on these two subjects. Put forward a plan, talk about ideas, talk about ideas. I broke it at first sight. Look at this posture, it is simply rude to the furious! I'm afraid I can't compete with others unless I show my unique skills!
And a sketch! ! ! ! ! ! ! ：
Narrator: In a rural health center. A and B are students who have just come to the hospital for internship. Director Xu, the only doctor of acupuncture.
In the morning, the director and B are in the clinic. The director asked B: Do you know what to pay attention to when seeing a doctor? B shook his head, and the director said, be sure to pay attention to the preferences of patients. B nodded and looked down at the book. At this time, Party A yawned with a schoolbag under his arm, carrying a bag of breakfast, and stretched for countless times (note that during the performance, Party A kept yawning, giving people a feeling of laziness), while Party B was immersed in reading)
Master: Xiao Jia, why are you late again today? Did you go to see Zhang Zhongjing again last night?
No. I don't know any Zhang Zhongjing.
Master: Didn't you say last week that you had to ask for leave from an old Chinese doctor named Zhang Zhongjing every night?
A: This * * * this * * * * *
Master: Have you written the medical record?
A: (Bowing his head) Not yet, but soon.
What the hell did you do last night?
A: Yesterday ... Yesterday ... [thoughtful]
Lord: Ah! Don't you remember? Probably playing games and chatting with MM on the Internet again, huh? ! Busy. No time to write medical records!
Then the phone rang (narrator) and the director answered the phone: "Hello. Hmm. All right, all right. I'll be right there. "
[God shakes his head and sighs] Yes. Students now! Either don't read or study. I'm going to consult now. The patient will come later. Tell him to wait. You two are fooling around. [Next] (B has been reading for a long time, and it seems that I didn't hear the conversation between A and B at all)
(The green word means in advance, followed by the dialogue between A and B ... It gives people the feeling that the director has been gone for some time. )
You have seen acupuncture therapy for nearly five times.
B: Only seven times. [Continue reading]
What a nerd.
[A takes out a small gray white coat, puts it on, pours water, takes a newspaper and eats breakfast]
Narrator: Just as A was eating breakfast and watching sports news with relish, a patient came. [Hands clenched, frowning, pale, rising slowly]
Doctor, I had diarrhea last night. I have diarrhea all night. Please have a look.
[A continues to read the newspaper, looking in high spirits]
D:[ increasing the volume, but still vibrato] Doctor, I had diarrhea last night. I've been pulling all night, and I'm soft. Please have a look.
A: [Don't look up, continue reading the newspaper] The weak market can only explain one problem: the team's poor performance. If you don't get good grades, naturally no one will watch the ball. It is strange that the market is not weak.
D:[ puzzled] Doctor, I'm not talking about the weakness of the ball market, I'm talking about my physical weakness.
A: [A keeps reading the newspaper without looking up] What's the matter?
I had diarrhea last night. I have diarrhea all night. Please have a look.
A: [A and B look up at the same time] Have loose bowels and see the acupuncture department. They must be nerds.
A: Put out your paws and let me feel your pulse. [talking and holding out his hand]
Ding; What do you mean by claws? That's a hand.
A: [It doesn't matter] It's all the same. Change that thing (that thing into a front paw? ) take it out.
A: [pressing on the edge of the ruler, touching it for a long time, talking to himself] Gee, strange, why doesn't this guy have a pulse? Pulse heartbroken ~ ~ ~ Your pulse potential is also blindly booing with the ball potential.
There is no hope.
B:
Come on, do you think the ulnar side can also cause * * * vibration?
Doctor: (puzzled) That's the back of my hand! Everyone takes this place (referring to the radial side)
A: [I suddenly realized, trying to hide] People are people, and I am me. I'm used to going around here first. Do you care? Are you a doctor or am I a doctor? "No shame, with a domineering look"
D: [Sorry] Of course you are. I was just asking. Go ahead.
Is it uncomfortable there?
D:[ a little annoyed] I thought you just said that! I have a stomachache. I want to pull it all night, but I can't. My back is so hot that my ass is sticking to the toilet.
A: [No fire]
___________________________________________________________________________
a； How many days have you been pulling?
Didn't you just say that? Since last night, and then bloody stool. If we wait any longer, people will die. Doctor, please help me.
a； [A presses C's stomach hard, and C yells in pain] Why did you pull so loudly all night? Not seriously ill. Bloody stool? What color is that?
D: bright red. That's terrible, doctor. Do you think I'm dying?
A: Bright red? Could be hemorrhoids. I'll give you some hemorrhoids suppository, and it will work if you plug it in.
Really? Thank you, doctor. I will take the medicine on time. How many times a day?
At this point, B looked up: A, he had diarrhea all night, and it didn't look like hemorrhoids. Ask him what he ate last night. What do you like to eat? Look at his tongue coating and pulse.
Nerd, you are very careful. [To Ding] Open your mouth.
C: Ah ~ ~ ~ [one mouth, one, I'll learn soon]
Oh, my God. Do you open your mouth or take off your shoes? It's delicious. (Hands waving in front of nose)
D: what? I must take off my shoes.
[A, B stop] No need.
What did you eat last night? 【 Inquire and feel the pulse 】
D: I didn't eat anything special either. Just yesterday, I saw a dead pig at the entrance of the village. I think it's a pity to throw it away. Picked it up and went home to eat a roast suckling pig. I'm still unfinished ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
A: Ah! This is not special? People like B usually don't know exactly what to eat. Definitely not good! ! ! Pay attention next time.
D: (suddenly realizing, patting his thigh) So that's it! Then the next time I pick a dead pig, I will definitely * * *
A and B: [in unison] No more!
D: I must wash it before eating.
A: Cough.
A: Is that all right? But our hospital likes you as a self-funded patient. Come often when you are sick. I'll give you a VIP card and enjoy a 5% discount.
b； A, I think he has bad breath, burning anus, bright red blood in his stool, yellow greasy fur and slippery pulse. All this in the book means a fever. And hurry first and then heavy. It should be damp and hot. The book says that the prescriptions should be Shu Tian, Shangjuxu, Sanyinjiao, Dazhui, Hegu, Taichong and Weizhong.
A: I came back again. Are you thirsty? Do you want some water?
B: How can a person like you who has no theory practice? {ten thousand rolled up his sleeves and took out his silver needle} ~ ~ ~ talking to himself ~ ~ ~ all over his body are calluses. I wonder if such a thin silver needle can handle it.
{Stabbing Dazhui ~} Ding turned around frequently, and he was very upset ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
B: Don't move. If you move like this, I can't aim at the needle correctly ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
{B When aiming at the acupoint, the needle tip butted against Ding's skin many times ~ ~ ~ ~ making him fidgety.
A: Still moving. Why are there nails on the stool? You also want me to give you something mandatory, {then strike the table}
Doctor, are you giving an injection or transplanting rice? Doctor, how many injections have you had?
B: I'm still giving a stitch and a thread ~ ~ ~ I'm ashamed to say that it's all your fault for not cooperating.
D: I'm dizzy ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
B: It says in the book that one stitch is missing from one hundred stitches ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ That's great.
A: Since you can't do it, stand still.
(B takes out a long needle) Ding yells, My God, it's so long. Are you for people or donkeys?
{B gestured left and right and hit a dart} {Ding saw that the situation was not good and ran away immediately} At this time, the master just hit his wrist with his hand}
A: Wow, it's the first time I've passed through Neiguan and Waiguan. What a coincidence.
B: Director ~ ~ ~ ~ I'm really sorry ~ ~ I'm sorry.
(The Lord roars at Party A and Party B) What are you doing!
Narrator: Party A and Party B pulled the director aside. Reported the situation just now.
Director: Alas, Soul Pivot. The phrase "Ask questions when you enter the country, ask questions when you are in class, and ask questions when you are near the patient" in Teacher Biography is to treat according to the preferences reflected by the patient. You have to understand deeply.
A: Please demonstrate, teacher.
Director: OK. Look carefully. (Roll up your sleeves and insert the needle)
D: ouch. Ouch. (takes a breath) Yeah. That's much better. Thank you, doctor. Thank you, doctor.
a； Teachers are just different. We totally convinced you today. I worship you like a rolling river.
H: All right, all right. (Yes) You did a good job. Pay special attention to patients' preferences when seeing a doctor. Symptoms may deceive people, but patients' preferences can often reflect the nature of the disease. All right, you and I practice injections. (1) You write a medical history.
It's done.
..... I'm exhausted