How to educate unsociable children? In the process of raising children, parents should not only provide material conditions but also cultivate children's communicative competence, because children always have to face the society. Below I share how to educate unsociable children.
How to educate unsociable children 1 1. Reasons for unsociable children
There are three main reasons why children don't fit in:
1, bad family atmosphere
For example, the relationship between parents is not harmonious, quarreling constantly, or parents are away from home for a long time, lacking parent-child communication. Such a family environment can easily lead to psychological depression of children. Children are eager to communicate with others, but they are afraid of being rejected. In the long run, it is easy to form an inferiority complex, withdrawn, negative and introverted personality.
2. Incorrect parenting style
Bad parenting styles include overindulging children, which leads them to be "responsive"; Always think that "only" one's own children are the best, forming a self-evaluation of children's "virtual height"; Discarding and beating children at will will bring a shadow to their lives.
Spoiling and "vanity" self-evaluation can easily make children form unhealthy qualities or habits such as excessive self-centeredness, excessive dependence, stubbornness and poor adaptability, thus making children lack communication motivation until they are unwilling to communicate. The "big stick policy" does not cultivate children who actively communicate, but it is likely to cause lifelong obstacles to children's communication.
3. The communication environment is single.
Some parents prohibit their children from interacting with other peers because they are worried about their children's "personal safety" and prevent their children from being bitten by their peers, resulting in their children being deprived of the opportunity to interact.
If children lack a normal communication environment since childhood, they will lack basic communication skills, will not discuss, will not be modest, and will not take the initiative to win friends, thus directly affecting the formation of children's communication attitude and the improvement of communication skills.
Second, unsociable solutions.
Being unsociable has become a very common problem for children who grow up in high-rise buildings and are spoiled in modern cities. Some parents think that unsociable children are withdrawn, introverted and even aggressive, and it is difficult to cooperate with others when they grow up, so they are anxious and even pessimistic.
In fact, being unsociable in early childhood can be completely corrected. Modern infant psychology believes that preschool children are in the embryonic and initial stage of personality, so we should seize this critical period to guide children correctly, so that they can form a good personality and the embryonic form of cheerful, optimistic and positive communication.
However, if we miss the best sensitive period of preschool, it is likely to affect the development of social adaptability and the normal play of personal ability in the future.
To cultivate a "gregarious", sociable and sociable child, we must start with eliminating the reasons that lead to the child's unsociable.
1. Create a good family atmosphere and improve the relationship between family members.
The whole family should live in harmony, be considerate of each other and give their children a peaceful and safe family communication environment. Try not to expose too many differences or even disputes between parents in front of children, so as not to bring a shadow to children's psychology.
2. Change the concept of parenting and improve the way of parenting.
It is necessary to respect the personality and rights of children as the main body and avoid arranging instead. Parents should pay attention to cultivating their children's self-care ability and get rid of dependence; Guide children to learn to care about their loved ones, pay attention to their feelings, and prevent excessive "self-centeredness"; Parents don't have to stay with their children all the time. They should consciously give their children the opportunity to play independently, let them explore and solve problems independently, and gradually form a solid self-confidence.
3. Create a real communication environment
Parents should let their children interact with others as much as possible and let them enjoy the freedom to contact unfamiliar environments and strangers; Actively guide children to actively communicate with peers, help children analyze and solve problems encountered in peer communication, and let children consciously make good friends and develop initial friendship through their own efforts.
Third, tips to solve the problem of unsociable family education
1, specially buy story books to cultivate children's social quality, and stimulate children's interest in communication with the help of the successful "cases" of the characters in the book.
2. From an early age, let children do what they can as soon as possible, cultivate children's awareness and ability of self-reliance and self-service, and get rid of dependence on adults.
3. Develop relevant skills and improve children's self-confidence. Children have herd mentality, love to imitate, and are easy to worship capable people. Therefore, teaching children some "unique skills" in advance, such as spelling models, origami, paper-cutting, songs and nursery rhymes, will enhance their appeal to other children.
4. Create opportunities for children to learn to communicate in situations. For example, let children participate in collective activities of kindergartens and community organizations. Living in a peer group since childhood, children will gradually learn how to live and get along. Parents can also take advantage of birthdays or festivals to actively invite others to celebrate together, so as to increase the opportunities for children to communicate with other peers.
5. Contact the teacher, give the children more opportunities to express themselves during the game, and cultivate their ability to speak in public. Teachers should encourage and praise such children more and improve their status among children.
6. Create a communicative environment with complementary advantages through kindergarten teachers. Teachers can group introverted children with extroverted children. The demonstration and influence of peers is of great significance in children's development. Be good at using the influence of peers and let children learn to communicate.
A child's healthy psychology cannot be achieved overnight. Problems in development, such as unsociable, cannot be corrected in a short time. Parents and teachers should be patient enough to guide their children to bid farewell to unsociable groups.
In addition, we should pay attention to the difference between unsociable and "speech disorder" and "autism". For those children who can't work by all means, parents should consult professional mental health workers and medical workers and give scientific intervention in time.
How to educate unsociable children? 2 What if children don't fit in?
1, guide children to associate with others.
Every child has a different temper, and some people are naturally introverted. Introverted children need the encouragement of their parents more, and they can usually give their children the opportunity to communicate with their peers actively. Usually, you can interact with your child at home and exercise your child's language ability. Communication requires skill, and a child who can communicate has no worries about making friends.
2. Be gently aware of the child's social will and seize the opportunity to guide.
Some children obviously want to play with children, but they stand aside and don't know how to join. At this time, parents should keep abreast of their children's social wishes and tell them, "If you want to play with everyone, ask your little brother if he can play with you." If children are afraid to go, parents can help them speak out. More times, the children dare to say it themselves.
A better way is to let children take the initiative to invite children to join, and children of the same age will not resist the invitation. If children have a strong desire to refuse to socialize, parents must guide them slowly and don't intervene rashly, otherwise it may be counterproductive.
3. Parents lead by example
Harmony between parents and other friends is also the best motivation for children. Taking children to participate in various activities can create more opportunities, contact other families to hold some small parties, or take children to participate in some parent-child activities to create various opportunities for children to contact with other children.
4. Encourage children to participate in group activities.
When children tend to be withdrawn and feel inferior, parents can encourage their children to participate in group activities, such as community children's reading contest and kindergarten sports meeting. Children can find pleasure in getting along with others in the group, and it is easy to find a sense of belonging, reducing loneliness and loneliness. However, parents should pay attention to step by step. Parents should not be too reluctant if their children are particularly resistant to participating in a group activity.