First, tell the children the rules.
After children go to kindergarten, parents should tell their children the disciplinary requirements of kindergarten in advance, and parents should also teach their children to use pencils, learn to speak, and form regular work and rest habits.
Second, give them space.
For energetic children, forbidding children's behavior sometimes causes children's resistance. Parents can set up a special area for their children to consume too much energy.
Third, give them autonomy.
Sometimes boys are naughty to their parents, not to make them angry. They just want to do things themselves, explore and try. At this time, parents should give them more autonomy.
First of all, parents should be sunny and positive, and words and deeds speak louder than examples.
Thank you for inviting me!
If you want to cultivate a sunny boy, you need your parents to be sunny first. A narrow-minded, short-sighted, often quarreling with colleagues and neighbors, haggling over every ounce, it is difficult for his children to be positive in the sunshine.
An American scholar, A. E. Winship, made a study at 1900, compared two families and wrote Jukes-Edwards. He followed the reproduction and development of these two families for nearly 200 years. One of them is the Edwards family, with three members, a vice president, 100 university professors, 14 university presidents, 70 lawyers, 70 judges, 60 doctors and 60 writers. Another sign? However, the Joekes family gave birth to 365,438+00 hooligans, 440 with sexually transmitted diseases, 65,438+030 with more than 65,438+03 years in prison, 7 murderers, 65,438+000 drunkards, 60 thieves and 65,438+090 prostitutes. This example fully illustrates the influence of family on children, and children are influenced by the advantages and disadvantages of their parents.
Whether a child is sunny or not cannot be entirely attributed to his parents. Some children are born timid, ugly, short stature, poor family and easy to feel inferior because of poor academic performance. The more they feel inferior, the less they know what to do. The more they lose confidence in life, the more alienated they are from the people around them.
As a parent, you should pay more attention to such children. First of all, you should make him confident. We should discover his merits and let him carry them forward. For example, if a child has strong hands-on ability, even if he is smart, he can be asked to do more manual work, which not only increases his confidence, but also makes plans for the future. If you do it well, you will get unexpected gains.
We have a child here who doesn't study well in the first and second grades of primary school. He looks stupid and talks a little too much. Later, I entered the Go class, and I didn't learn very well at first. After studying for several years (three years), it suddenly broke out. Not only is Go the best, but I also learn it the best. People have become confident and their eyes have become bright.
It's the most important thing to find your self-confidence.
Do you think that's the reason?
Just read a news that a 26-year-old couple in Shijiazhuang was diagnosed with COVID-19 epidemic. The epidemiological results showed that from June 65438+February 19, 20265438+ 10/0, the mother's whereabouts were roughly as follows: taking her son out to see a doctor twice, visiting the nursery and buying fruit. Dad's whereabouts are much simpler: at two o'clock and one line, Internet cafes-at home-at home, go out and ride an electric car to surf the Internet in a nearby Internet cafe at 8 o'clock every day, eat at a nearby Mala Tang at noon, and go home at 5 o'clock in the afternoon.
It's really hard to see this news. This mother is in Shijiazhuang, which is a few degrees below zero. She takes her children to see a doctor alone and takes care of the daily life at home, while this father is completely living a free life as a bachelor. If we just look at his whereabouts, no one believes that he is married.
Family, there are too many such families in real life, just like every time I take Yuanbao to the park to play. Looking around, 80% of the children are brought by my mother. She is responsible for playing, cooking and shopping. My mother is always like a perpetual motion machine that can't stop. When my family Dabao was in primary school, he went to have a parent-teacher conference. There are 54 children in a class, and no more than 5 parents attend the parent-teacher conference. I don't need to say more about the importance of parents' companionship in family education, but why do so many families take care of and accompany their children and become a mother's business? How to make fathers more involved in parenting, especially when there are boys at home? I suggest:
Mom won't be an all-around superman. I remember when my mother was born, my wife had a caesarean section. Because she was old, she didn't recover very well. My mother simply ignored everything and let me worry. When I saw other novice fathers in the hospital, I gave the children to the nursing staff for care. Only my family is responsible for milk powder, changing diapers, washing face, burping, rubbing buttocks cream and sleeping. My wife asked me to accompany her all the time. My Dabao was like this. I stayed alone in the hospital for three days, and I learned a lot of experience before I got used to it.
No matter how well dad does, encourage dad to take an active part. I remember when I just resigned and brought my ingot. I was not very good at making children's food, because I am from Hunan, and I can hardly fry without Chili, but I can't eat spicy ingots. I tried several times and found that children didn't like it, and I was a little discouraged. As a result, my wife kept praising my tortillas, saying that it was the first time for me to eat such delicious food. Fortunately, children eat less. In this way, under the praise of my wife all the way, I became a super daddy, and sometimes I disliked my wife for being too thick and not caring enough for the children.
Confident sunshine boy, it's my father's turn to take me to observe the boys in our Dabao class. Half of the children are quiet children who can only read. They don't have the courage and confidence that boys should have. In order to prevent my Yuanbao from becoming such a child, I encouraged him to climb up and down boldly, play slingshot, ride a bicycle with one hand, climb on the grass, touch snails in the river, catch cicadas in the tree and catch chickens on the farm. These are all things we played when we were young, Yuanbao.
When parents are raising their children, I think two people should learn from each other, learn from each other's strengths and learn lifelong parenting courses to help each other become better parents.
I have two baby sheep, the difference is 12 years old. The boss is a daughter. She has been smart and aura since she was a child. She has a clear love and hate, and has a woman's character. The second child is a boy, because we were older and premature when we gave birth to him, so before we were three years old, we were really afraid of falling into our mouth and holding it in our hands. Since childhood, we have been timid and lazy, and with white and pink eyes and eyelashes, we look like a little princess, which sometimes drives me crazy.
When my baby went to kindergarten at the age of three, I found that he was too delicate, easily sick, afraid to do this and that, and had poor self-care ability. At this time, I stopped my usual interest classes in English, Lego and painting, and changed them to swimming, taekwondo and physical training. I take him out of kindergarten in advance every afternoon to participate in sports interest classes, and my father takes him to outdoor sports on weekends. At first, he couldn't exercise until he was paraplegic. I supplemented him with milk, eggs, bread and so on. After a while, I can finish the whole exercise class slowly. I wonder what dad took him to do at the weekend. Anyone who comes back is covered in mud and sweat. After eating and washing, he basically slept until dawn. His face is round and he is long. Sometimes his father is too busy to spend time with him on weekends, so he rides a balance car and plays in the garden with a ball on his back.
Dabao is now a large kindergarten class. He is no longer the youngest child in the class. All the sports activities in the kindergarten can reach the standard, and the activities held in the class are actively participated. He is full of confidence and vitality in everything.
How can we cultivate a sunny boy? Through the growth process of Bao Xiao, I think that to cultivate a sunny boy, we should do the following:
1. Learn to reserve boys. Don't be afraid to fall or get dirty. As long as it is not dangerous, go with the children.
2. Be sure to let dad participate in the process of raising children. Nowadays, because of the pressure of work, it is often that dad works hard to make money outside and mom takes care of the children at home, which makes it easy for dad, a powerful role, to set an example.
Before boys go to primary school, they must put physical exercise in the first place. With physical strength, children can be confident and concentrate more on their studies.
4. Let boys play with some positive boys who are a little older than one or two years, and children will naturally become sunny and positive.
The most important thing is to teach by example, and one's own mentality has the most direct influence on children's reading.
We can ask ourselves first, am I positive enough and full of positive energy?
If so, then you don't have to worry about your children.
If not, you can only make yourself positive through continuous learning.
Here you need to ask yourself first, what is sunshine boy?
Psychological, academic, physical?
According to our conventional understanding, there is no doubt that it should be defined as psychological, but we often get into trouble in learning this problem, and then because of various wrong methods, children are repeatedly frustrated in this respect and naturally ignore their mental health development, then we can never have a sunny and healthy teenager in the general sense.
Disassemble this problem into psychology, learning and physiology, and we can ask ourselves what we did worst and learn from it.
Learning is very important. Although children are our crystallization, they are also a gift from God. It is also an excellent thing to have the opportunity to grow up with him.
In my opinion, the most important factor is the family environment. If the family atmosphere is harmonious and warm, and the family relationship is harmonious and beautiful, boys will grow up in this environment, and their personality will naturally be sunny, and they will always maintain a positive attitude towards life. In addition, the father's participation is also very important for the boy's growth. During the boy's healthy growth, his father's company cannot be absent. No matter how busy he is at work, our father always finds time to spend with his son. There is also interaction between men and their sons, such as accompanying him to study some scientific and technological inventions and explaining the structural principle of a car. In addition, do outdoor sports with him on weekends, such as playing ball games and running.
This thing is not cultivated. Family atmosphere, parents' words and deeds, ways of doing things, etc. Have a subtle influence on children. If you want to have children, you must first do it yourself, so as to influence the children to develop in their own direction.
If you want to cultivate a sunny and positive boy, you must first have a harmonious family relationship. 1. Chat with children and spend time with them.
Now most parents are busy with work and have little time to spend with their children. After a long time, the parent-child relationship will be alienated. You can chat with your children when you send them to school in the morning, and play games with them after they finish their homework in the evening, so that they can feel how happy their parents are.
2. Encourage children more.
Every child wants to be affirmed by his parents. Although sometimes some things are not done so well, I still hope that parents can blame less and encourage more. Encouraging children more will make them confident and willing to share things with their parents.
Respect for the child
No matter how young children are, they also have their own ideas and choices. As parents, don't blindly deny that children help their children make choices, listen to their opinions properly, respect their ideas and let them have their own choices.
4. Let children grow up in a loving environment.
The relationship between parents will affect children's character. A happy and beautiful family environment will make children have a sound personality, and good family relationships will also make children feel a loving life in their later years.
First of all, there must be a pair of parents who are really sunny and positive.
I emphasize the word "truth" because there is no shortage of people pretending to be sunshine in this world.
Pretending to be sunny sometimes leads to excessive pursuit of positive energy, normality, correctness and positive emotions. Therefore, negative energy, mistakes, shadows and negative emotions cannot be tolerated in life.
Therefore, children can't make mistakes, can't be wronged, be brave, can't be sunny, can't be strong, can't lose, can't give up, can't work hard, can't laugh!
Children who meet such conditions can only be fake children.
Real children will cry, be sad, make mistakes, be imperfect, be afraid, be jealous, be angry and be lazy.
However, after crying, you can laugh more happily. After sadness, anger, fear and jealousy, you can learn to manage your emotions instead of suppressing or indulging. After making mistakes and discovering areas that you are not good at, you can concentrate and stick to your preferences and responsibilities.
And these less sunny and less perfect parts need the acceptance and companionship of parents.
It is not easy to cultivate a sunny and positive boy.
Parents should have wisdom and courage to face the real world.
Roman Roland said that there is only one kind of heroism in life, and that is to love life after recognizing the truth of life.
If there are such parents, the child's sunshine is the real sunshine. Sunshine that is not empty, frivolous, vain and exaggerated. Warm, resilient, generous and strong!