Psychologists say that security is not a sense of dependence. If a child needs a warm and stable emotional connection, he also needs to learn to be alone, such as leaving himself in a safe room.
Children don't necessarily need their parents to be present at all times to feel safe. Even if they can't see you, they will know where you are in their hearts.
Experts say that adults need to "respond" to children's needs, not "satisfy" everything.
Second, satisfy children to some extent.
Some boundaries must be set artificially, and children's requirements cannot be met unconditionally.
"Another prerequisite for happiness is that children can withstand the inevitable setbacks and disappointments in life."
"Only when a child understands a truth, can he get inner enrichment and happiness not by desire but by ability."
The sooner a child understands this truth, the less his pain will be.
Don't always satisfy your child's wishes the first time. The right thing to do is to delay it.
For example, if a child is hungry, you can make him wait for a few minutes.
Don't give in to all the children's demands. Refusing some requests will be more helpful for children to get peace of mind.
Accepting this kind of "unsatisfactory reality" training at home will give children enough psychological endurance to face setbacks in their future lives.
Third, when the child is angry, treat it coldly.
The first way for a child to get angry is to distract him and try to make him angry in the room. Without an audience, he will gradually calm down.
Appropriate punishment, and stick to it.
The strategy of saying "no": don't say "no" dryly, but explain to your child why not.
Even if the child doesn't understand, he can understand your patience and respect for him;
Parents should agree, not one says yes and the other says no; Prohibit one thing and give him the freedom to do another.
Fourth, face up to his shortcomings.
If the child is different from other children, such as the child is too fat, has a problem with the shape of his ears, or has extreme personality and behavior,
Parents must not deny these facts, but actively discuss with him to find a solution or accept the reality.
In this regard, it is the best way to find an expert, because children generally take the words of experts (such as doctors) seriously.
Fifth, criticism, not people.
Criticize children according to their merits. For example, the child broke his mother's jewelry, which is right:
"You see, if you play something that you have no right to play, such a bad thing will happen."
It is wrong to say "you are so bad". How can you break my jewelry? You mean not to let mom wear it! "
The first sentence clearly told the child that his mistake was "moving something that should not be moved" and did not deny the child's character.
The second sentence gave the child a gender, which made him very depressed and hit his confidence in being a good child.